Okay, slightly misleading title but I’m asking for advice on two points.
1. When I first had sex with my OH (over 10 years ago) I had no problem with him inserting his full length (approx 8-9”), we separated for a few years and reconnected in the last year. Since then I am having a lot of pain when he is fully inside. Do you know possible reasons for this? It’s pretty much every time we have sex, nothing to do with times of the month, and I’m in my late 20’s.
2. Any ideas what I can do to fix it? He isn’t great at ‘being gentle’ and can’t control himself as far as only going partially in (this is another issue entirely and I’m not asking for advice on how to improve that) but is there anything I can do? Toys that might help? Exercises I can do? Does anyone else have experience of this?
Thanks!
Alicia4Ever wrote:
1 have either or both of you lost weight, it wouldn't take much, if he used to be close to hitting your cervix,if that's what you are saying he now does. Or are you using different positions, now to then; some postions allow for deeper penetration. I can't think off anything else.
2 try different positions, that don't allow for deep penetration, or which give you control of how deep such as cow girl. You could try using 1 or 2 cock rings, to stop him getting in as deep, but as you say he gets carried away, he could end up giving your vulva a bashing instead. You could get this, and it's on sale, https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=36502
cut the front off it and use it as a giant cock ring, which is much wider so less likely to bash your vulva. Cut it off longer and see how you go, you can always cut a bit more off.
If anything I’ll have put weight on, definitely not lost it (sadly!). As far as positions go, no change there. I already angle myself differently so he can’t go all the way in 😕.
I’ve tried suggesting big cock rings before but he’s not too keen. His past experience with cock rings hasn’t been great because they’ve been too tight (his penis is also very girthy). Any that are made for extra girthy members?
Bit of a personal/ triggering question, no need to answer. But children, childbirth may be a factor, if that is something that has occurred in the meantime.
The cervix goes through changes with childbirth and will often go back after 6 weeks, but it could also move...
Lovehoney - Leanne wrote:
Bit of a personal/ triggering question, no need to answer. But children, childbirth may be a factor, if that is something that has occurred in the meantime.
The cervix goes through changes with childbirth and will often go back after 6 weeks, but it could also move...
It’s been happening for a lot of months now so I certainly hope not 😳, I also have an implant so I double hope not! Might take a test just to be sure though! Thanks!
Oh no, sorry. What I mean is... If you have given birth already, then the cervix can move and cause painful sex. By the sounds of things that is not the case.
Lovehoney - Leanne wrote:
Oh no, sorry. What I mean is... If you have given birth already, then the cervix can move and cause painful sex. By the sounds of things that is not the case.
Ah, I get you! No, no babies!
Alicia4Ever wrote:
Liquidsugar wrote:
If anything I’ll have put weight on, definitely not lost it (sadly!). As far as positions go, no change there. I already angle myself differently so he can’t go all the way in 😕.
I’ve tried suggesting big cock rings before but he’s not too keen. His past experience with cock rings hasn’t been great because they’ve been too tight (his penis is also very girthy). Any that are made for extra girthy members?
There are some really soft stretchy cock rings, https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=28366
you can get this around both wrists at the same time, so; the masturbator I linked before will be really soft too, for the price it would be worth a go. He should be willing to try if sex is painful for you.
Is it definately his length that's the issue ? if he's going up to 9 inches in length I'm supprised you didn't used to have issues.
I don't really know if it's possible but your uterus could still have moved lower, even if you haven't had a baby. I think you should speak to your gp about this, as something has changed in your body.
Yeah it’s super strange that I never used to have issues, we’d f***k like rabbits with no problems at all!
I’ve been thinking I should probably go to the GP but wondered if anyone else had experience with anything similar. 😢
I’ll definitely give one of the toys a go, hopefully he’ll work with it!
My cervix is at a funny angle so anything too long I really struggle with, its very painfull and certain positions are too as well as using tampons if I dont get the correct angle. Luckily for me my husband is not that well endowed, I recently brought an 8" toy but it was too painful, I ended up putting a stroker on the shaft just like Alicia 4 Ever said, this helped a lot with it not going in too deep.You say that this hasn't been a problem before so maybe a trip to the GP may help. Good luck.
Has he acquired a curve or anything where even in the same positions he’s hitting you in a slightly different spot? I’ve found even a slight change makes a huge difference. (My bf picked up a bit of curve when we tried one cock ring and it really changed things for me.) Also, just taking enough time for your body to be prepared could make that difference too. If my body isn’t in line with everything else things are ouchy even though I’m on board. Sometimes we have to stop and wait and give my body time and then start again and then it’s fine.