There's only three years between me and the bloke (I feel like I'm in a minority here lol) but I can't imagine not dating him if he were much older. At the end of the day it's personality and if you click that counts. It can look a bit odd visually for age gap couples, but then people will always find something to judge others for, so why care?!
Glad to hear you bucked off the negative relatives. As much for your relationship as for your son. :)
well to drag an old thread up
a bloke ive been *hoping* it may happen with is 7 years older than me (24) i'm 18
hes thinking hes too old, ad i dont know what i can do or say to change his mind, though i know that may never happen
Nexas wrote:
He's not too old. I'd probably get together with a woman twice my age if I felt she was right for me. He needs to realise that he's LUCKY a woman 7 years younger is interested LOL
yeah but somehow i know im not going to be able to change his mind :(
i mean i personally would go to twice my age as well and seven years in the grand scheme of tings is nothing
sweetlove666 wrote:
a bloke ive been *hoping* it may happen with is 7 years older than me (24) i'm 18
hes thinking hes too old, ad i dont know what i can do or say to change his mind, though i know that may never happen
I think that if he thinks he's too old, then he probably is. If he doesn't, then he isn't.
My kvetch is 10 years younger than I am, and I've got another potential partner who is scarily younger than me, but since the age doesn't bother any of us, then it isn't an issue. My potential partner's previous was concerned about age. That wasn't why they split, but I'm sure it was a factor.
I think age matters only when any of the participants think it does.
Lubyanka wrote:
sweetlove666 wrote:
a bloke ive been *hoping* it may happen with is 7 years older than me (24) i'm 18
hes thinking hes too old, ad i dont know what i can do or say to change his mind, though i know that may never happen
I think that if he thinks he's too old, then he probably is. If he doesn't, then he isn't.
My kvetch is 10 years younger than I am, and I've got another potential partner who is scarily younger than me, but since the age doesn't bother any of us, then it isn't an issue. My potential partner's previous was concerned about age. That wasn't why they split, but I'm sure it was a factor.
I think age matters only when any of the participants think it does.
thanks lubyanka. i kinda came to the conclusion that he thought he was too old when he said "youre still young". its a fantastic excuse, to say the least!. for me seven years is nothing, but for him it is obviously a lot. i tend to go for older, more mature people as it is
I agree about the breaking laws part, I forgot to include it. :)
And in my experience, age is one of the excuses people use when they can't handle relationships and want to blame it on the other person. So many choose that one because it's not like you can change it! A big giveaway for me was that you say he says "you're so young" instead of something more like "I'm too old for you".
I mean, yes, if he thinks you're young, and if that's an issue for him, then he should just say so and move on. I'm sure we'd all appreciate a whole lot less of all of this dicking about and pretending it's your fault for being the wrong age.
Ok, rant over. :p
yep, that very true lubyanka!
again saying age is nothig but a number ect only really works for those who want to hear it
The thing is, I strongly disagree that "age is just a number". My experience is that age, like hair colour or height, is a feature of a person. Age tells me what experiences that person is likely to have had, and likely not to have had. Age tells me they're likely to have more experience of certain things, and less experience of certain other things. Age tells me what they're likely to have learnt or not yet learnt from their experiences. Age tells me something about what experiences they're likely to have had or not had with their friends. Many of my peers agree with me that age, whilst not a deal breaker, is certainly an important feature of a person.
So for me, if a person says "age is just a number", then I know that the person saying it is likely to be a young person.
For a really basic example, I must keep in mind that kvetch won't know some of the things I know, such as being a teenager in the 70's and early 80's. Then again, I won't ever know about being a teenager in the 90's. And those are both features of our ages. Important? Yes. Enough to impair relationships? No.
That's my take on it anyhow.
i agree to a point, it is important part of a characheter, but i'm 18. okay ive lived for only a decade but i often find that i am more mature and have more of a grip than most people my age. I tend to identify with people older than me "adults" if it were, always have. i cant stany certain idiosnycracies of people who use their age as an excuse and it happens with any age of people i guess!
Yes it does. :)
I used to date older guys, considering I'm only 19, that's not hard, but it was under the premise that with age comes a certain degree of maturity, and it just doesn't. I met a 17 year old who, to begin with, lied to me about his age because he knew I wouldn't have paid him any attention if I'd known, he told me he was 21. And he has to be the most intelligent, mature, collected person I've met. Ages 15 to 50. So age really is nothing but a number, unless you're talking about under 16s, cause let's face it, whether they're mature or not, it's still illegal.
I go for older guys......generally
i dont know why i just do- in long term relationships. i think age is just a number and as long as youre not breaking any laws or hurting anyone then i dont see the problem have been out with someone 20+years older than me and theyve been just as immature as a 16 year old. If you like each other i dont see why age is an issue
i think the real problem lies with the people who have the problem!!!! (you know what i mean!)
PPB
x
I think the taboo over age gaps is something recent, if you look back over history, even to your grandparents era then it was common for men to wed women much younger. It was the Norm.
If the youngest party is emotionally mature enough to make the necessary descions then what does it matter.
Obviously there are considerations for the distant future when the older party start to fade with old age (if the gap is so great) but if the relationship is strong enough endure then it could be a beautiful thing.
pinkprincessbarton wrote:
I go for older guys......generally
i dont know why i just do- in long term relationships. i think age is just a number and as long as youre not breaking any laws or hurting anyone then i dont see the problem have been out with someone 20+years older than me and theyve been just as immature as a 16 year old. If you like each other i dont see why age is an issue
i think the real problem lies with the people who have the problem!!!! (you know what i mean!)
PPB
x
Very true most of the time.
Royo = awesome by the way.
The problem!! not a Scooby what the problem is Danielle, spill the beans do !!
Talloy
The problem!! not a Scooby what the problem is Danielle, spill the beans do !!
Talloy
Andserkiel wrote:
Nexas wrote:
I prefer older women, but I would never say that it's morally wrong for someone to date someone who's 4 years younger than you as long as they're over 16.
I personally think the age of consent should be raised to 18 so that's mainly why I wouldn't go for anyone below that age. I mean although I don't really drink I wouldn't be able to go out with them to pubs or clubs or to the cinema to see an 18 certificate film and it would make me feel old haha! Although of course I'm aware people mature at different ages I'm just not comfortable being with anyone younger that 18.
to be honest no one pays a flying monkeys to the age of consent anyway. i know plenty of people wo lost their virginity before the age ( personaly i didnt) it has also been shown that countries that have a lower age of consent tend to have older first timers
to be honset at the moment i would go five to eight years older and only about 2 younger. it is startling that i am 18 and could be legitimatley datintg someone could not drink with!
sweetlove666 wrote:
Andserkiel wrote:
Nexas wrote:
I prefer older women, but I would never say that it's morally wrong for someone to date someone who's 4 years younger than you as long as they're over 16.
I personally think the age of consent should be raised to 18 so that's mainly why I wouldn't go for anyone below that age. I mean although I don't really drink I wouldn't be able to go out with them to pubs or clubs or to the cinema to see an 18 certificate film and it would make me feel old haha! Although of course I'm aware people mature at different ages I'm just not comfortable being with anyone younger that 18.
to be honest no one pays a flying monkeys to the age of consent anyway. i know plenty of people wo lost their virginity before the age ( personaly i didnt) it has also been shown that countries that have a lower age of consent tend to have older first timers
to be honset at the moment i would go five to eight years older and only about 2 younger. it is startling that i am 18 and could be legitimatley datintg someone could not drink with!
Eek perish the thought !!! How scarey is that- no not really but damned odd!!
TB
tallboy247 wrote:
The problem!! not a Scooby what the problem is Danielle, spill the beans do !!
Talloy
So lost by this. Lol.
well as sum1 in a relationship with a v large age gap i personally think theres nothing wrong with it my OH is 28 yrs older thn me we been 2gether ova 3 yrs with no probs and r very well matched if it wrks then go 4 it...