Being more open

Me and my OH were with a group of friends the other night having a few drinks. Now most of my friends are female that I have grown up with through school and beyond. We are all now 35. When we were younger (around 21) we were drinking and the topic of masturbation came up with practically all the females accepting their men did it but none of them admitting it themselves. Two of them were almost disgusted that women 'did it'. Fast-forward to the other night and the topic of LH came up in conversation as one of the girls recommended it to another woman with us. Low and behold the topic of masturbation came up and everyone admitted to doing it, some more than others. It was then said that it is more acceptable in society now to do it or be known to doing it due to Sex and the City and other programs. Do you guys think its true that its much less of a taboo these days than it used to be? My friends all seem to be fully open about the topic now, and not just because of alcohol imvolved

Its because its 2019 and not 1919 , the world is a better place now lol

Granted it is 2019, but seemingly things have gotten more relaxed since the change in the millennium don't you think?

It could be that your group of friends has mellowed with age. 🙂

Edit: Interestingly, Sex and the City aired from 1998-2004, which would put it right at the time of your first conversation about it when you were all 21 ish.

Ian Chimp wrote:

It could be that your group of friends has mellowed with age. 🙂

Edit: Interestingly, Sex and the City aired from 1998-2004, which would put it right at the time of your first conversation about it when you were all 21 ish.

I think technology is also something that has helped people feel its more the norm rather than something that is taboo. Technology has massively advanced over the last 2 decades with YouTube channels, social media and the likes getting info out to the masses

And even great websites and forums like LH 👍

I’d say we’re generally moving in the right direction in terms of being more sex positive these days, and it’s worth celebrating. There’s tons of cultural ‘baggage’ though. Women in this part of the world used to feel more pressure to portray themselves as virginal, demure, and so on. Sex before marriage was frowned on & the idea of enjoying your own body was portrayed as sinful by huge numbers of people. I think the fear of being slut-shamed used to be way higher.

To be honest, I don’t know if things have changed. Back in the Eighties when I first started drinking with my mates, we never discussed sexual things, discussions were mainly about drink and football. I haven’t seen them in many years, but if we did meet up we wouldn’t be talking about sexual issues. None of us would share personal issues, we would just try and deal with them on our own.

I think all the posts are correct, we are getting more open and relaxed generally across the last 1-2 generations I feel. Not all the time and some alcohol helps generally loosen things up on a night out but I've talked with a number of other ladies about masturbating and sex toys. We have even made jokes about it when one of the husbands has been away for a week or two so I think things are becoming more progressive and open.

As each generation gets more open the taboos become less taboo. Growing up my mother was not at all open about sex, masturbation etc but I had 'the talk' with my daughter quite early on and we are far closer and more open about things. Its not something we discuss regularly but we did discuss if she started to have sex or masturbate when the time came and I do know she has a vibrator that I had talked to her about.

In most ways regarding sex, yes. We can remember the sexual revolution / "summer of love" era of the 70s when the pill had just become available for single women (before then it was only given to married women, amazingly). Maybe it's not quite as free and easy now, but our children seem to be very liberated sexually. There are also swinger clubs in most large towns now, some have several. And of course sex toys freely available (thank you, Lovehoney!) My ex had to buy me my first vibrator from a seedy sex shop as they were not available anywhere else then.

But there's also a 'new prudishness' around - I used to go topless on non-nudist beaches in the 80s and 90s but you rarely see any toplessness these days, even in France, where almost all women went topless on beaches in the 80s. Naturism is not having an easy time either, with clubs now more or less used only by mature people, not the young.