My husband had erection problems when on anti-depressants and was given Cialis which helped. Not sure what it can do for orgasms but worth speaking to your doctor.
I had the same issue with not getting an orgasm when on SSRIs so feel your pain! It was so frustrating. When I went off them it was like all my senses came alive. I was ultra horny and just constantly wanted sex and masturbated a lot
Speak to your GP and see if there are any other medications that you could try that are not SSRIs? Do you get on with them other than the effect on your sex life? I didn’t get on with them, the side effects were awful and they didn’t really work very well either. I now take something else which I feel much better on. If they are helping you then it would be a bit risky changing them, that would be up to you and your doctor.
I used to find porn and erotic fiction helpful to really get my head in the right frame of mind.
A big hug to you. Both my husband and I had sexual performance issues on SSRIs so you definitely aren’t alone there.
My honest advice? Wean off of the SSRI’s (do not go cold turkey, it can be dangerous) and ask to try therapy instead. Even try AI-assisted therapy (there are some great free apps in the app stores). It was the best thing I ever did for myself and I hope it will be for you too.
If you’ve tried at least 2 and didn’t get on with them, you’re allowed to say no and ask for something else if that’s your preference. SSRIs are all similar (slight differences are noticed by some people but not all), so if you haven’t got on with the ones you’ve tried there’s not much point staying on them or trying another one. If there are other options, push to try them if that’s what you want. When it comes to mental health care, I’m afraid you have to strongly advocate for yourself, which it awful given that when someone is struggling with their mental health, the last thing they want to do is stand up for themselves! I’ll admit that I went privately after trying 3 SSRIs and getting fed up with feeling like a depressed zombie with horrible side effects. I was given something different that I immediately felt better with. I came off it a couple of years ago but have since restarted it, this time on the NHS, I had to specifically ask for it and say that I wouldn’t consider anything else but they did agree to it without too much fuss.
Sorry, I should say, this is just my opinion and experience. I’m not a doctor, just someone with experience of mental health issues. Obviously everything should be done with help from a doctor.
Oh bless you, I do understand. I have (harm) OCD myself; I started getting violent thoughts just before my wedding and I panicked because I thought I must want to act on them. I started getting contamination thoughts too because I was worried about leaving evidence. It’s a horrible condition to live with, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
@SirShagALot My husband has been on SSRI’s a couple of times for anxiety and the last time was in Covid, he’s been off them for the last year or so now.
We saw the same issues as you and they definitely affected his sex drive and seemed to basically turn off his ability to have an orgasm after being on them for 2-3 months. He could masturbate for an hour and still not get there and his urge to do that also went away.
I do have to say that the sex was the most satisfying and best we have ever had though as he could just go on and on without cumming, so for me, it was actually great.
I’ve been on the meds for years and know that exactly the frustration as I can’t climax in front of anyone and even on my own it takes a good hour or two to reach climax but of recent since I’ve had my meds upped I’m not even getting urges or sustained erections!
oddly though I’ve noticed over the years there’s been points where I’ve become more horny than usual like there’s been a spike in mood getting through.
Ultimately, I’m not sure there’s much what can be done as anything to increase hormones or that will probably counteract the medication… doctors usually will just prescribe viagra as a fix but that won’t solve the cumming issue or the feelings with it.
At first I found it empowering! I could go on and on and on. My wife has had the best time
When you consider that 25mg Sertraline is prescribed for PE and you’re taking 200mg, well…
I’m back down to 100mg now so I can manage to achieve orgasm but really only by hand.
My goal is to get the Sertraline down to 50mg. I’m hoping that my mental state can handle it.
I have been on most anti depressants over the years and agree with you especially regarding citalopram, made my head feel like a big ball off cotton wool. Climaxing also took ages.
Its a difficult situation because unless you are receiving medication, a lot of the times you aren’t a candidate for therapy, a therapist will say they cant ‘work’ with you while un medicated, well that’s what I found. I would push for more therapy, talking therapy especially, it may take 4, 5, 6 goes but it really will help, in the meantime think of the anti depressants as a your crutch, same if you’ve broken your leg, you use a crutch until you heal, they don’t need to be life long and taking back control of your mind will be the best thing, could you maybe use a lower dose? Just to see you out the other end.
I weaned off mine years ago and while I still suffer from bouts of depression, I know the signs and use strategies to help instead.
Would you consider role play or something visual to help set the mood? I don’t want to say porn as that brings its own problems but I know visual effects can be helpful.
I thought it would be extremely frustrating for my husband but surprisingly he said he kind of got used to it and didn’t feel particularly frustrated sexually.
He said that being aroused was still very pleasurable and that being able to last during sex and being able to wank himself for as long as he wanted without cumming was actually very not bad at all!
Yeah I think it’s a mix of both as you don’t really get sexual frustration yet it’s nice to just play and enjoy the moments. Although currently for me I’ve not had any sexual urges at all, but in the back of my mind I keep thinking about it
