Difficulties reaching orgasm.

How many of you have difficulties cumming? Do you know the reasons? How are/have you overcoming/overcome this issue?

Sorry, I just have so many questions. I am starting to get rather frustrated because it's become hard for me to orgasm and I reckon it's because of the pill (Microgynon). Before taking it, I was able to cum through wanking about 3-5 times if I wanted to. Now it's a struggle to even do it once but I still try.

This problem often makes me feel unsatisfied during sex as my partner tries very hard to help me reach climax but has been straining himself too much lately and has done his back in. This makes me feel pretty bad and I don't want it to continue ):

I haven't really explored other methods of contraception but I am going to soon.

Thanks! :D

Are you stress?

I am on the yasmin pill it doesnt really effect me in ie hormones ect I was on the microgynon and i was horrible on it I have PMT weight gain ect that is the cheapest pill that the NHS offer hence why once people are on it first .

I would suggest you try the best to relax and enjoy maybe have some alone time with a vibrator and try and find what turns you on ,

My OH uses Yasmin too which seems to be very good for her. She reaches orgasm best by using her Humdinger vibe (sold here http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=21149 ) or by my rubbing myself along and over her clit at a fast pace... This usually does it for her!

As K.F said... You will need to explore yourself, perhaps alone first... After all, if you don't know yourself then how will someone else ever get to know you. :)

Good luck!

The microgynon pill destroyed my sex drive! It made me moody and I put on so much weight, I tried a different pill (can't remember the name), the depo injections and the implant and they all made me a hormonal mess. After seeing a contraception advisor she said something with as less hormones as possible would be best for me. So I went for the coil, I have the marina coil that does release hormones, but there's another one you can get that doesn't affect your hormones at all. I chose the marina coil because I get heavy periods and very bad cramp, but that's all gone now, I don't get cramp at all, and the chemicals that are released don't travel through your system and are focused in the uterus.

I hope that helps a bit, it might be worth seeing an advisor and seeing what's best for you. Welcome to the forum :)

Hiya and welcome.
So have you tried a range of toys and or various positions?
Personally I find clitoral orgasms eassier to achieve and using a small bullet vibe on my clit helps. Also for penetration. Certain positions make. It deeper and easier to orgaasm, for me doggy or putting my legs over my OH's shoulders. Just wondered what you've tried so far.

I've done plently of exploring with myself, hahaa ;) and my boyfriend and I have tried out many positions. He's the best I've ever had and i've slept with 8 people.

I do have some of my own toys as well (two bullets and a g-spot vibe), I love masturbating and I believe it's very healthy so i've had no worries about exploring myself.

I guess I should change what pill I use then but even without the pill, I struggle from time to time. With the coil, i'm worried about it getting nudged out of place or moved but I'll make an appointment with my GP discussing these.

I've just been browsing and I think I'm gonna try this out http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=24568 :D

dOphilia wrote:

I guess I should change what pill I use then but even without the pill, I struggle from time to time. With the coil, i'm worried about it getting nudged out of place or moved but I'll make an appointment with my GP discussing these.

I had the same concerns and my GP put my mind at rest completely so definitely book an appointment. I'm on the Minera coil now which has been a life changer. I had my first pain free period last month which actually bought tears of joy! I used to have crippling debilitating pain before now. It's also great if you’re not good in a routine. Although the fitting can be a bit painful.

I was switched from Microgynon because I ended up having loads of complications with it unrelated to period pain. One of the side effects listed is a lower libido so that could be a reason you’re having difficulty climaxing if your state of arousal is lower. So I'd say go and talk to your GP. May be embarrassing at first but trust me they've seen and heard it all before! I was on the Cilest pill before the Minera and that was a good pill too so if you don't want to switch to a long acting contraceptive then there are other great pills out there. Take time to think about what would best suit you and do some research before taking the plunge.

You can always try an orgasm booster in the mean time like this http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=24568 or I personally love this http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=19945 Xx

sometimes I struggle if im not feeling relaxed or comfortable. Sometimes my partner varies his thrusts at precisley the wrong moment! sometimes he will finish and we will then start on helping me and the break means I struggle. Sometimes i'ts simply because too much stuff is happening at once and I get sensory overload.

There's lots of reasons, but the best advice is to take your time and not rush things and try to scedule times when you can both be relaxed and have good energy levels

Do you think it's partly to do with feeling pressured by yourself to orgasm, or not relaxing completely or feeling in the moment? Perhaps you and your partner could have some long exploring sessions where there is no focus on orgasm.

relax, get comfortable, and take your time, there is no time limit, sometimes with me can happend in minutes other times over half hr, depends on mood your are in

I've just been prescribed Femodene, are any of you ladies on it? what do you think of it?

Do you think it's partly to do with feeling pressured by yourself to orgasm, or not relaxing completely or feeling in the moment? Perhaps you and your partner could have some long exploring sessions where there is no focus on orgasm.

We already do that ): We often have hour long sessions of just rolling about and doing whatever we like. Amazing thing is that my boyfriend can cum multiple times and stay hard as well, I give him a lot of credit for that.