I'm just pondering over this issue. Before starting to post at this forum do you read the rules that is spelled out here? Let's see the numbers.
1) YES
2) NO
I sort of did 🙂, but I've picked up quite a lot of actual examples of what is and isn't acceptable from things cropping up on the forum and members kindly pointing out when someone has accidentally broken the rules. I think most people try and be polite about it, and it seems to work well as long as the rule-breaker doesn't get too shitty about it. 🙂 It's always more about education rather than any punishment, as most of us just want to keep this place as friendly and inclusive as possible. There are plenty of other places on the internet that would be better suited for some of the most common transgressions (flirting, attempted hook ups, sharing contact details, sex chat, naughty pictures, graphic stories, etc) so I think it's fair to ask people to use those places for that kind of thing, and just stick within the forum rules when posting on here. 👍
No It is mainly common sense. There are few posts which have been removed that I thought a little odd, they were captured under the too graphic rules. I was assuming that under 18 would not be present and therefore could not seem the harm in those. Other rules I completely agree with and would not like the forums to become a dating app. In the main people comply and it makes it a nice environment in which to exchange views and comments. I agree with the approach cited by Ian Chimp.
I am the same as Mr Chimp, I had read the rules but not as thoroughly as perhaps I should have.
I am personally guilty of breaching the forum rules on more than one occasion, usually due to my dirty mouth being somewhat overly explicit in details in my posts although I guess this could be slightly open to different interpretations of what would be overly explicit.
Either way my common sense, or lack of it, should have been employed more and since then I will be thinking twice about what and how I write. I will now take into consideration the naughty content of all my future posts and tame myself.
I personally think that this site is the one place filled with naughty like minded people, a lot of who find pleasure in being rule breakers so to speak, me included most of all probably. But rules are rules and we should all read and follow them religiously.
💁🏼♀️❤️
I have read the rules, but it was so long ago, you forget certain ones, in the same way i forgot how to post a pic in the pics thread. As already said, it`s common sense, but as this is an adult orientated site, i guess it`s easy to get carried away.
Married-learners wrote:
But rules are rules and we should all read and follow them religiously.
💁🏼♀️❤️
I'm not sure I'd say anyone needs to be religious about it. 🙂 But posting within the rules is definitely the way forward. 👍🙂
There's a good thread that outlines the difference between explicit and graphic language here:
https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/community/forums/sex-tips-and-talk/700919-new-rules/
I think it's helpful to remember that the forums are a really good intro to sex toys and kinks, and many new members may be a bit nervous posting for the first time (to ask advice, or just to join in) if it's all a bit full on. 🙂 So I think that's why it's nice to keep it as friendly and inclusive as possible. 👍
Were you flagged with "2 yellow and a red cards?.... and you are classified as suspended user? I think it's much common sense but I learnt as I violated the rules. I've got 2 yellow cards now, and if you don't see me posting here it's b'cos (I'm issued with a red card) and I fell into the category of a suspended user. Good luck posting.
When you are flagged with "2 yellow and a red cards?." ... and you became a suspended user, right? Like most, it's much common sense posting but I learnt as I violated the rules. I've got 2 yellow cards now, and if you don't see me posting here it's b'cos (I'm issued with a red card) and I have fell into the category of a suspended user.
Good luck posting.
Apology, although it's within the 5 minutes I edited my post but couldn't change my posting.
Yeah I scanned the rules with the first couple of days of joining and then I have just picked up and understood the rules further as I go about my normal business. They are pretty basic and easy to understand rules so i haven't been given any warnings as yet.
Can't honestly remember if I looked when I joined. If I read a post and for some reason it just doesn't 'feel' right then normally if I scan through the rules it becomes apparent why it's ringing alarm bells for me. I think it would save the Mods a bit of time and hassle if you had to tick a box to say you have read the rules prior to joining/ being able to post. It's not like there's reams of it to wade through. Then everyone knows what is/ isn't acceptable. This forum is, as far as I can tell, a fairly unique safe space online to be able to discuss sex without it turning into wank-chat. That is to be celebrated as far as I'm concerned, and long may it continue.
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Tried to post this earlier but the web site 'rules' decided I hadn't typed enough so refused to post it.
Even if you read the rules when you join, they change so often you may find yourself on the wrong side of the 'law' unintentionally - and then how they interpreted seems to depend on who is policing that year.
I would agree with BigishBen, over the past 4 or 5 years it all seems to have disolved into a very confined space. I came onto the forum to ask about sex toys and people's experiences of them, back then people could discuss the relative pros of a LoveHoney toy over what they could buy on the High Street at Ann Summers (who knows if I have just broken the rules by using that name), now - it is all so censored.
Just like LoveHoney's return policy, everything changes - not always for the better.
I did, but my memory isn't the best in the world. The ones that stuck were not being too graphic and not linking to external sites. Specifically ones that sell similar products to LH.
I did. I also watched the forums before I started taking part. To be honest, I've forgotten them now but I think I remember the key ones.
The 'no overly graphic language' seems to be the most contentious one, judging by the comments so far. 🙂
My two cents (for what it's worth 🙂) is that I think just because someone is over 18 and likes lingerie/sex toys doesn't automatically mean they're going to enjoy overly explicit descriptions of what people do with their purchases/partners. That's not to say that you shouldn't indulge yourself somewhere else. The internet is jammed full of places you can do that, and you can even pop pretty much anything you like in your own blog and link to it here if you want to share it. But I think having this one place where people can chat about sex and sex toys in as open and friendly environment as possible is a really great thing.
You might even find that after a couple of months of this place new members who were at first reluctant to discuss topics of such an intimate nature gain the confidence to write a blog themselves. 🙂
Yes I did and I agree with all of them, I certainly wouldn't have stayed here as long as I have if they weren't as well as they have been. It's a safe place to get advice play some silly, fun games and get/offer support.
Whilst I understand that some of the rules can be misunderstood or open to interpretation and am alway sympathetic to new joiners, I do get a little irritated if there are are longer term members joining in and with regard to explicit/graphic language I do feel that the majority of 'offenders' are looking for something better catered for elsewhere (e.g a similar response, reaction, ongoing/escalating commmunication or appreciation of their storytelling/creative writing skills) and if not language and vocabulary is easily moderated to ask your question or give your response without making anyone uncomfortable or breaking the rules.
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I can't remember if I did or didn't read the rules, but I apply my own basic test to posts. Would I be happy reading what I am trying to write? Does it go into more detail than it needs to?
Sometimes, no matter how big of a hammer you use, you can't beat common sense into some people. The rules seem to be there to at least provide guidance on where lines are crossed.
I'm 100% with you and the moderator should read this post and give us your respond..Private_member wrote:
Tried to post this earlier but the web site 'rules' decided I hadn't typed enough so refused to post it.
Even if you read the rules when you join, they change so often you may find yourself on the wrong side of the 'law' unintentionally - and then how they interpreted seems to depend on who is policing that year.
I would agree with BigishBen, over the past 4 or 5 years it all seems to have disolved into a very confined space. I came onto the forum to ask about sex toys and people's experiences of them, back then people could discuss the relative pros of a LoveHoney toy over what they could buy on the High Street at Ann Summers (who knows if I have just broken the rules by using that name), now - it is all so censored.
Just like LoveHoney's return policy, everything changes - not always for the better.
I used to be quite happy buying from LH and at the same time enjoying the fourm. For a while, a year ago, I beginning to feel that their slogan "happy people" is diminishing, firstly from my "violated" posts getting deleted, and I agree that I'm at fault. Being at fault I became an unhappy customer.BigishBen wrote:
Just feel there is a lack of consistency. I I've seen threads taking down for being sexually explicit then I see one with 13 pages titled "how big is your cock" and that's fine for folk to talk in detail about the size of their manhood. Just saying. If your old enough to purchase and use the products on the site you should be able to read or not read forums at your discretion.
BigishBen wrote:
Just feel there is a lack of consistency. I I've seen threads taking down for being sexually explicit then I see one with 13 pages titled "how big is your cock" and that's fine for folk to talk in detail about the size of their manhood.
No worries. 🙂 I'll quote the examples from Jess's thread if anyone is still having trouble telling the difference:
Jess wrote:
It's not so much a case of 'too much detail' if the detail is required, I'm referring more to when the person posting chooses to use harsh / expletive language to describe something when it really wasn't required and the information passed on would have been equally as useful without it. For the sake of offering an example, I will break my own rule!
NO- "I rammed my asshole with my new anal dong last night - I can still feel myself throbbing and gaping as I write this. I smothered myself, the toy and my whole house in lube and squeezed it in, feeling my a-hole stretch over the tip. I can't wait to use it again and watch myself cum over and over again. Next time I'm going to frantically frig myself off at the same time to see how much I can cum...."
YES- "I tried out my new anal dildo last night - it was amazing!! I made sure I used plenty of water-based lube and was impressed by how stretched it made me feel. Certain positions were better than others and I personally found inserting in a squatted position easiest. The orgasms were fantastic and I think it could be my new favourite toy! When I come to use it next time I think I'll try using it alongside my bullet for clit stim as well."
These two paragraphs basically say the same thing, but the choice of language is completely different - going back to the age old saying "It's not what you say, but the way you say it".
Hope this helps. 👍🙂
Hello Ian Champ, I chose to differ. My 2nd deleted post by moderator has nothing to play with the choice of words. It was a simple Chinese New Year greetings. I learnt that there are customers from Singapore, Malaysia, and others and I assumed majority are Chinese (not China Chinese - there's a diff. ) . They may not participate in the forum but I'm sure they read the forum. Even if they don't, my post is totally non offensive at all got removed. Other times I agree my posts violated the rules with no ill intention to offend LH or the members of the forum.