I thought about writing this in the sperm donation thread but feared it might get lost or be slightly off topic.
I am thinking about donating eggs to help women and couples that cant have children themselves, I have done some research and am aware ofsome of what happens and some of the drawbacks to egg donation, I was wondering if anybody had some personal experience with it or why/ why not do it?
My partner is impartial about it and says it doesnt bother him either way and its my decision to make with my body and I feel like its something id really love to do though have been advised to do some more research and not make any hasty decisions. Does anybody have any insight?
I would be interested in this too. I'm unsure of egg donation can result in the biological mother being liable for child support which is the case with sperm donation now I believe. I wouldn't mind donating eggs, or even being a surrogate, at some point in my life.
I am afraid i have no advice I simply wanted to say it is an amazing thing to do. One set of friends is using an egg doner and the other is using a suragate, both are amazing couples and would make brilliant parents unfortunatly nature is against them. You could bring so much joy to some people and so much love too. It is lovely you are even considering it. x
this website seems pretty good http://aquarius.futurewebspace.co.uk/ngdt.co.uk/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=66:becoming-an-egg-donor&catid=1:becoming-a-donor&Itemid=14
That's lovely. It worries me though with all the couples who find out they're siblings due to things like this.
Obviously you are going to think very carefully before you decide.
I think surrogate mothers do a beautiful job as well. I was thinking about that as a solution to my partner wanting children in the future. I have tokophobia. Tbh I think I will just stick to fostering other peoples children and hope he is satisfied with that!
Do you give blood too? I wish I could but I am prone to fainting. I'm an organ donor though so lets hope I die in hospital! Xx
thanks all for your input :)
I dont currently give blood- I did sign up for it but the collection service is while im at work so need to arrange it for a more convenient time.
I am wondering about the potential of a child seeking me out later in life and contributing towards it (CSA etc)?
I read the website Lilac, it has some good info though I was wondering, do the couple wanting a child meet me? Is information about me kept on 'the system' such as my hair, eye and skin colour and do the future parents choose eggs based on this info or is it a non choice thing? Of course if I were to go on and have kids of my own I would inform them that they may have siblings, Id feel it was their right to know.
Just wondering if you went ahead with this?
I know it's a while back now but does anyone else have any personal experience since this thread started?
I am currently starting the counselling part of the donation and would be good to hear from others that have experienced this.
Will be following this, as it's something I have considered in the past :)
Well, I can comment on the start of the process.
It has started with blood tests for the usual STIs, HIV that kind fo thing and an FSH blood test.
I then had a consultation (needs to be within 3 months of blood tests) and discussed the options with the doc at the fertility clinic. He then performed an internal scan to check egg count etc on day 21 of the cycle.
So I am now booked for counselling as they do counselling sessions to ensure you are certain you wish to do it as you can not be anon. You have to give over your information, which the child has access to at the age of 18. At 16 they can know minimal details too. But you have no parental responsibility.
Next (all being well) is more bloods for chromosome checks and medical history consultation.
You ladies are changing people lives! Truly amazing!
Thanks, CLTSTU.
Many clinics have had some bad press around egg sharing/donation recently. Literally the day of my consultation an article came out about it all.
Has this affected anyone's decision that may have been thinking about doing it at all?
Leanne it's so cool you're doing this. I've been thinking for a while I'd like to do it but part of me is concerned that I'd be liable for the child. Financially and if anything happened to the parents would services want me to have the child?
Young and fun95 wrote:
Leanne it's so cool you're doing this. I've been thinking for a while I'd like to do it but part of me is concerned that I'd be liable for the child. Financially and if anything happened to the parents would services want me to have the child?
Thank you :)
From the info I have, you have no parental responsibility for the child, even if they choose to locate you later in life.
I guess that would be personal to you and circumstances if you wanted to take on a parental role (if allowed)
But I assume it would standard like usual set up- whoever is in the will, immediate family, godparents etc.
It's a good question and I will be asking this on my next appointment. Personally, I wouldn't mind if they did reach out to me but I also understand I wouldn't be their mum as such. So many ins and outs!
I guess it's one of those things that's so personal that it's really got to be decided on an individual basis. Do you know if you meet the couple or if they just choose from a file? How many times do you think you'd like to do it? It reminds me of a film where a guy donated sperm throughout his college years and ended up with over 100 kids or something and they all went searching for him.
Yes, I watched that film... Delivery man with Vince Vaughn! haha
They have a waiting list that they will match me up with (cycle wise, data etc) and they will do it fresh on the day. So they will be there at the same or around the same time as me but I am not sure that we actually meet.
If I am able to as in all comes back ok (as I am just at the beginning of all the tests and counselling) I think I would like to do it again.
I get the most horrendous periods and sadly me and the OH can not conceive naturally, so it would be nice to know that after the pain I go through someone may be able to make a family from it.
Do you think you will go for a consultation? I start the next part of the process at the end of the month so I am sure I can let you know more then too.
Yes thats the one! Solid film, thought provoking and hilarious!
Oh right, do they have to give you the IVF type injections? I think that'd be the worst bit tbh
That's a lovely reason to want to donate.
Just researching it a bit now. Just read that you can leave a message for the kid for if they come to find you which is quite cute.
I will be having the IVF style injections. I hate needles so I will get the OH to do it haha!
Yes, you can and leave an explanation as to why you decided to donate :)
I'm sorry to say I have a pretty negative story to tell. I'm not trying to put anyone off egg donation, it is a very noble thing to do and there are plenty of couples out there who rely on it to get pregnant. However, there are serious risks involved.
My friend and her partner had been trying to get pregnant through IVF, which they had to pay for themselves. They had already failed to get pregnant twice from the IVF and it was getting very expensive. The clinic would offer a significant discount if my friend agreed to donate some of her eggs to the clinic. She agreed both because they were struggling to pay for the IVF and she wanted to help other people. Anyway, a long story short, she Developed severe Ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome. This meant she was in hospital for weeks and almost died at one point. It also meant that although she had managed to donate eggs for other couples, she was too sick to be implanted with her own fertilized egg. As you can imagine this was very distressing for her.
She has since been too traumatized to try the IVF again, even though she desperately wants a child. I think she feels like the risks were not fully explained to her and the financial incentive was really stressed to her by the clinic. They made it sound like it wouldn't be any bother at all. Never did it cross any of our minds that this was potentially lethal.
Now, having said that, the risks of severe life threatening OHSS are very rare (I think around 1%), but it is a possibility and should be taken into consideration. When I think about it it makes me so angry at the clinic, and I get very emotional. I'm not trying to upset anyone though, I'm sorry if I have, I know how important egg donation is, I just don't want anyone to ever feel traumatized and like they were tricked like my friend did. Enter into it being fully aware of all the risks.
I think it's such a selfless thing to do. It's something I don't think I could ever do and I have the upmost respect for those who do this.
That's super sad jezebella.
Good luck on your journeys guys. Wish you all the best of luck 😘
Another scare story but my friend decided to donate her eggs too and she got bad ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome and was in horrible pain. Not trying to put anyone off as lots of people do this with no problems but it's important to know the risks and side effects.