Dad's porn collection and a vibrator in someone's house.
when i was about 11 i was looking through a drawer in my parents bedroom while they were out and found: porn polaroids, playboy mags, vibrating eggs, cock rings, lace and metal chain outfits and a small vibrator. didnt think much of it then but now when i look back i wince.
LoveHoney - Hella Rouge wrote:
Found my mother's realistic vibrator under her bed and pornographic polaroids in her jewellery box. Lols!
lol! Awkward!!
Never found anyone elses, But when we were in our flat, We had all the family over for christmas eve -
My brother and sister in law, My inlaws, Jade, Her brother, My mum and dad and my uncle and his wife...
Our little man who was 3 at the time came running in the front room waving around a totum pole ( ann summers rabbit from like years ago ) and a large dildo in the air saying ' look what i found mummy! ' with a big smile on his face. To say we were both mortified is a major understatement!
What made it worse was my step-aunty asking whee we shopped, Which prompted my mum to get on her proodish high horse and start saying how discusting it/she/us was/were and promptly told my dad they were going home, As I was getting my mums coat, she made sure to tell me how deeply dissapointed in me she was, And that she thought J was a 'decent' girl!
Kinda reminds me aswell, The time when our boy was still a baby and pulled my sister in laws tits out in the front room on crimbo day in front of everyone! Good job my nan was in the kitchen lol!
Oh dear, that does sound highly embarrassing!
Worst was when staying with a male friend.
He was out on night shift, so I was allowed to use his bedroom to crash in, but when I went in he'd left the top drawer of his bedside unit open.
Inside was a plethora of butplugs and dildos. This really wasn't so bad within itself as I think toys are part of a healthy sex life.
What was unhealthy and disturbing was the general condition of them, a number of them looked and smelled like they had never known the touch of soap and water :(
I tried hard not to vom and closed the drawer, never talking about it as it was just too revolting to mention.
He still at times leaves some of the but plugs on top of his bedside unit and I just try to ignore them when I visit.
We had just moved into our first home. We were decorating the bedroom and got a little carried away, used a toy whilst we were at it. We got interuppted (Isn't that always the way!) and the vibrator was just shoved under the pillow and forgotten about.
Anyhoo - fast forward a little, the sister was helping paint the bedroom with my wife and mother-in-law. She flopped onto the bed - streched her arms out, and came back holding the vibrator.
I thought it was hilarious, the sister in law saw the funny side, but the mother in law thinks we are sex crazed perverts:-)
she just jealous it wasn't hers lmao
lickmadick wrote:
she just jealous it wasn't hers lmaoExternal Media
Thats what I said at the time!
Another time
My son (5) came downstairs when we had a house full of friends with a rabbit and asked if he could play with it - that was quite funny. Luckily this time the people were a little more open minded.
LoveHoney - Hella Rouge wrote:
Found my mother's realistic vibrator under her bed and pornographic polaroids in her jewellery box. Lols!
Oh god you win *cringe*
so happy ive never found something of someone elses and far as i know no one has found any of my stuff :P
Dxx
Never founds anyones toys but my ex did have a stash of porn mags he thought I didn't know about. When we split up I took the pleasure of going over to his place with the pile of mags, handed them to him and said something like "did you really think I didn't know about these" He was mortified and didn't know where to look! I had a right good laugh on my way home!
Never found anything myself - i knew where my girlfriend kept heres for sometime, so the occasional pointed comment and casual glance used to get her a bit worried, Especially in company!
I found my mum and dads strap on before now.... and butt plugs.... actually made me LOL!!
Only a very small proportion of the sexually active population don't have secret stashes of 'something' - some people are just much better at hiding them than others! When I was a teenager way back, a long long time ago, under my mother's pillow was the enamelled handle from an old breadknife which she used as a dildo. I even remember when it was actually part of the breadknife!!! (Jeez!)
It was in the days when you bought one condom - washable and as thick as a cycle innertube - and kept it in a large tin of French chalk (in my mother's top drawer) !
Nowadays our not inconsiderable collection of bondage gear and and lesser-used toys are kept in one of those small lockable metal trunks that Lidl have on offer from time to time - a good investment! The more frequently used items sit in a large handbag under my partner's side of the bed, not very original I know, but we no longer have inquisitive children or horny young adults wandering about! the place!
Books of porn have been replaced by computer files in hidden folders and if anyone is given access to the house whilst we are away, the computers are securely passworded and the day-to-day toys are locked in the Lidl trunk! Terrible spoilsports, aren't we?
Very good points sospiri, throughout history people have secretly stashed stuff while tutting at the other people who get caught for having stashed stuff.
yes ive found one. Dunno whos it was. But i was working in a charity shop and put my hand in one of the bags that someone brought in and i took out this big purple vibrator! I have never gone to wash my hands so quick in my life! lol!
I found my mums...
What a shock (I was 17)
lol
I was at a friends house preparing for a charity night with a few older ladies and her 4 yrs old entered the room with a rabbit she had managed to switch on and thought it was a rocket lol
I have never seen my friend go so red or move so quick.
The funniest thing was the old dear who made a comment about how amazing toys were now a days lol