I received a friends request from a guy who dumped me 14 years ago and I was heart broken at the time so guess who got ignored? Now I can understand searching for an ex if you had been dumped but not when you were the dumper. So what would you do in this situation? Would you ignore it or would you befriend someone who hurt you years ago? Would you yourself go looking for someone you had dumped or would you leave it be?
I'm not on Facebook and generally find people an annoyance so No to most of the above questions.
Some people do things like that hoping to make things right, I know a lad who got a friend expelled after an accident and he tried to contact him, say sorry etc...
Some people are also just stupid and not aware of what damage they have done or think people will forget.
Id delete and ignore straight away..............dont get that at all.....they dumped you...which is hard for anyone to deal with......now years later..they want to be 'just friends'...................sod off i say......either that or he probably did a 'curiosity search' of old flames...(come on we've all done it)........found you, realised how damn stunning you were.......and wanted to perhaps try his luck....
i say....'jog on'..............you had your chance matey!!!
Hmm, he probably thought that you'd have gotten over it after 14 years, and maybe he was just innocently searching on fb for people he knows (or knew)
Personally I really don't know how I would react if an ex that broke my heart tried to friend me on fb... I'd probably accept out of curiosity to be honest! It doesn't sound like it would be beneficial for you to get back in contact with him though, judging from your post it seems like you're still hurting from way back when he ended things.
FB is a strange world isn't it? - Best of luck dealing with this situation doll. xxx
Like WandA facebook isn't my cup of tea. Ignore him. End of story. Simples! Wouldn't ever go looking for anyone either. I'm an antisocial fucker me! :-) SG x
I'd definitely ignore him. Accepting him would give him the impression that you're still bothered about him! You should just show him that you've moved on with your life. Perhaps he added you to see what he's missing? x
Suze it's funny that you brought this up. Last week or the week before my ex sent me a friends request on FB. It got ignored. I really don't think he actually wants to be friends. This is the guy who cheated on me, and has had almost no contact with my son for the best part of 3 years. Not even a message asking how his son is. As far as I am concerned he can go take a flying fuck to himself.
I think if people are in your past, that is where they should stay, after all they are in your past for a reason. x
sexy little minx wrote:
Suze it's funny that you brought this up. Last week or the week before my ex sent me a friends request on FB. It got ignored. I really don't think he actually wants to be friends. This is the guy who cheated on me, and has had almost no contact with my son for the best part of 3 years. Not even a message asking how his son is. As far as I am concerned he can go take a flying fuck to himself.
I think if people are in your past, that is where they should stay, after all they are in your past for a reason. x
So he's more bothered about his ex's relationship status and mutual friends list than his son...
What a bellend.
I suppose that if you want to catch up with him, have a chat, see how he is doing, then accept the request. I don't see the Facebook point of having a billion friends. I think, if you are going to be friends with him then by all means accept him. But if you will never chat to him, then there is no point.
I had an ex (and mutual friend of lots of friends) friend request me, there were no residual feelings there (aside from annoyance) so I accepted. Now he just spams me all the time with adverts for his band, their gigs and crap like that. I might un-friend him.
I only see the point of being friends with people you actually chat to....
im a great believer in "forgive and forget".
when i left college in 2008 there was a lot of bad blood between me and another person ( a male who we'd both wanted sex together, but he then messed me around)
when he tried to add me i permitted it. when he comes looking for sex or trying to play games i just egnore it
no one is perfect, but he's nice enough and i get on with him in other ways.
Kitty_McPlunder wrote:
Hmm, he probably thought that you'd have gotten over it after 14 years, and maybe he was just innocently searching on fb for people he knows (or knew)
Personally I really don't know how I would react if an ex that broke my heart tried to friend me on fb... I'd probably accept out of curiosity to be honest! It doesn't sound like it would be beneficial for you to get back in contact with him though, judging from your post it seems like you're still hurting from way back when he ended things.
FB is a strange world isn't it? - Best of luck dealing with this situation doll. xxx
No not hurting at all just confused as to why!!! I was young and had just started a new job so had plenty of nights out to help forget about him and less than a year later met the man I married so didn't really give him a second thought untill this morning.
WandA wrote:
sexy little minx wrote:
Suze it's funny that you brought this up. Last week or the week before my ex sent me a friends request on FB. It got ignored. I really don't think he actually wants to be friends. This is the guy who cheated on me, and has had almost no contact with my son for the best part of 3 years. Not even a message asking how his son is. As far as I am concerned he can go take a flying fuck to himself.
I think if people are in your past, that is where they should stay, after all they are in your past for a reason. x
So he's more bothered about his ex's relationship status and mutual friends list than his son...
What a bellend.
Got it in one WandA.
sexy little minx wrote:
WandA wrote:
sexy little minx wrote:
Suze it's funny that you brought this up. Last week or the week before my ex sent me a friends request on FB. It got ignored. I really don't think he actually wants to be friends. This is the guy who cheated on me, and has had almost no contact with my son for the best part of 3 years. Not even a message asking how his son is. As far as I am concerned he can go take a flying fuck to himself.
I think if people are in your past, that is where they should stay, after all they are in your past for a reason. x
So he's more bothered about his ex's relationship status and mutual friends list than his son...
What a bellend.
Got it in one WandA.
I second WandA here. You are both better off without him xxx
suze9 wrote:
Kitty_McPlunder wrote:
Hmm, he probably thought that you'd have gotten over it after 14 years, and maybe he was just innocently searching on fb for people he knows (or knew)
Personally I really don't know how I would react if an ex that broke my heart tried to friend me on fb... I'd probably accept out of curiosity to be honest! It doesn't sound like it would be beneficial for you to get back in contact with him though, judging from your post it seems like you're still hurting from way back when he ended things.
FB is a strange world isn't it? - Best of luck dealing with this situation doll. xxx
No not hurting at all just confused as to why!!! I was young and had just started a new job so had plenty of nights out to help forget about him and less than a year later met the man I married so didn't really give him a second thought untill this morning.
Oh i see, sorry for the missunderstanding! It is confusing as to why he would try and friend you after all this time, and after so much has happened.?
I would have ignored him too, and blocked him for good measure in case he tried it again. I'm a hard hearted cow at times, but if he hurt you so much, he doesn't deserve to have you, even as a friend.
x
suze9 wrote:
I received a friends request from a guy who dumped me 14 years ago and I was heart broken at the time so guess who got ignored? Now I can understand searching for an ex if you had been dumped but not when you were the dumper. So what would you do in this situation? Would you ignore it or would you befriend someone who hurt you years ago? Would you yourself go looking for someone you had dumped or would you leave it be?
I have recently tracked down someone who dumped me many years ago. She did it for her own best reasons- career and fortune. Having achieved both, unbeknown to me, we have all but resumed where we left off.....
You never know!!!!!!!!!!!
TB
tallboy247 wrote:
I have recently tracked down someone who dumped me many years ago. She did it for her own best reasons- career and fortune. Having achieved both, unbeknown to me, we have all but resumed where we left off.....
You never know!!!!!!!!!!!
TB
|Money grabbing sod... External Media
Hope you can enjoy how things go quite pressure free now and it works out TB!
Hmmm thanks WandA but l fear it will not be as simple as l portray!!!
Cheers though
TB
my ex did that i accepted so he could view my profile see i was happy and then deleated him. i still get messeges from him asking to meet up but its not worth it. have you had a messege or anything? if not then dont even bother accepting. xxx
Well, its difficult to know why your ex sent you that request. As Kitty said, he probably thought after 14 years that you'd have gotten over it. I know I'm way too forgiving as a person, but if you're happy then I don't see too much harm in adding him, remembering that you can always delete him later if need be.
@SLM - Same again, you don't know why he sent you that request. You said he hasn't had any contact with your son for three years, but perhaps this was his way of getting to talk to you without the scariness of doing it face to face or on the phone, testing the waters so to speak. Of course you know the situation better than I do, but I do feel that in both yours and Suze's case, it's easy to assume the worst of someone who's hurt you in the past. In Suze's case, it could be quite innocent, and in SLM's case it could be a means of establishing contact again.
I'm with SL, I'm a big forgive and forget person.