Fantasy

Hi all.

After 21yrs being together, my oh (wife) has revealed her fantasy is to be met by a strange at a bar or hotel. have drinks with him then go with him for sexy fun. then later on come back to me. not sure how to deal with this. need advice!!!

Del

Why not role-play with it, with you pretending to be the stranger. Especially if you spend the day apart so each of you can get dolled up, then bump into each other at a hotel bar, have a couple drinks and flirt as if you've just met then invite her to your room.

If it's only a fantasy, she doesn't actually expect to have sex with a stranger, but this could be a fun way of entertaining the idea.

innocent-fun wrote:

Why not role-play with it, with you pretending to be the stranger. Especially if you spend the day apart so each of you can get dolled up, then bump into each other at a hotel bar, have a couple drinks and flirt as if you've just met then invite her to your room.

If it's only a fantasy, she doesn't actually expect to have sex with a stranger, but this could be a fun way of entertaining the idea.

Just what I was going to suggest!

Yes, try the roleplay. We've done it, and it's fun!

I think you need to chat to her about whether this is something that she's just happy to have as a fantasy or if she's serious about taking it beyond her imagination.

That will giive you a steer about how to (or not take it forward). If she would like to act it out then the suggestions above are an avenue that might be worth exploring or of course if she really wants another man then there's a whole other range of options.

I am quite sure it's just a fantasy and nothing else to worry about. Aa the other have suggested it's a brilliant role play to act out.

This is a very common fantasy for women ( and probably a lot of men too! )
Have fun with roleplay :)

On the way to work I have had time to think more about this since my original post which is a bit short and sweet as It was posted on my new Tab of which I am slowly getting used to. Anyway now on the works PC with a proper keyboard .

A few ideas for you to consider and the reasons for them .

1) Chose a neutral venue . Don't use your local as you are bound to be interrupted by people who know you. Pick the venue carefully and use your local knowledge as to suitability of a woman going there alone .

2) Consider your dress . Its best done if both of you are wearing clothes that are unfamiliar to you both. This fantasy is probably the type I would leave to winter as a sexy dress could be worn under an overcoat . Not really appropriae for summer

3) Make sure for safety reasons that you are already in the pub before you OH enters. You really don't want to leave her too long on her own as you will not want unwelcomed advances/approaches from other guys . Otherwise this may be acted out for real!

4) An hotel stay over would be better as it would add to the occasion.

5) Pretend that you have never met each other before and allow plenty of fore play petting and snogging before getting down to the business end .Ie really treat it as a first date .

6) just in case, make sure you both have your mobiles switched on before you meet up .

7) Most important enjoy and tell us all how it went ![](upload://h7LJ67OOrR57VDYrj5ZEwwHAfLG.gif)

i think she wants to act it out.

has anyone done this, and if so what was the out come?

Stranger role play is definitely fun we did this for my clothing scent fetish fantasy,We played it out in a town not near us so we wouldn't bump into anyone we knew.

If you're not comfortable with it, then it's a no go. It doesn't matter how big a fantasy it is for her, if there's any doubt in your head then it WILL lead to problems in your marriage. I'm sure she understands this, and I hope you do too. Sharing a fantasy doesn't involve any obligation to make it come true! As long as you don't put her down over it or make it into an issue, simply saying no to this is not unreasonable.

I'd suggest talking to her about it, just to be absolutely clear on what her intentions were with sharing that with you. If she didn't explicitly say to you that she wants to do it, there is no need to panic and wonder how you could cope with it. She could just have been sharing, she could have been testing the waters to see how you'd react, she could be just as unable to cope with the idea of going through with it as you are, you won't know until you ask her really. Just keep the conversation calm and ask her how serious she was, what her motivations were, is she aware of the effects it could have on you both etc.

It could be that the role play route would be enough for her-again, talk with her and see what she thinks. If she wants more, and you're comfortble to let it happen, you can make it very impersonal by hiring someone to play the part of the 'other man'. It would be expensive, but peace of mind has no price really and that way you'd know that there would be no further contact between them, no personal affection developed, nothing but acting out the fantasy. It's a better option than letting her meet a random man or a friend, who won't be in on the act.

If you google you can find some very enlightening blog posts on this or similar scenarios, unfortunately the emotional effect on the relationship takes a toll and more often than not one partner ends up hurt and regretting the choice to let it happen. You (and your wife) have to weigh up is one night of sleeping with a stranger good enough to risk anything happening to damage your relationship. Chances are it's not a strong enough fantasy to be worth it. Not to mention that it will never play out exactly how she imagines it, and in reality it could just end up being an awkward as hell fumble with another man! Sometimes the worst thing you can do with a fantasy is try to make it come true as it just won't live up to the expectations.

I hope you can talk this out with her and set your mind at ease.

Lovebirds_x wrote:

If you're not comfortable with it, then it's a no go. It doesn't matter how big a fantasy it is for her, if there's any doubt in your head then it WILL lead to problems in your marriage. I'm sure she understands this, and I hope you do too. Sharing a fantasy doesn't involve any obligation to make it come true! As long as you don't put her down over it or make it into an issue, simply saying no to this is not unreasonable.

I'd suggest talking to her about it, just to be absolutely clear on what her intentions were with sharing that with you. If she didn't explicitly say to you that she wants to do it, there is no need to panic and wonder how you could cope with it. She could just have been sharing, she could have been testing the waters to see how you'd react, she could be just as unable to cope with the idea of going through with it as you are, you won't know until you ask her really. Just keep the conversation calm and ask her how serious she was, what her motivations were, is she aware of the effects it could have on you both etc.

It could be that the role play route would be enough for her-again, talk with her and see what she thinks. If she wants more, and you're comfortble to let it happen, you can make it very impersonal by hiring someone to play the part of the 'other man'. It would be expensive, but peace of mind has no price really and that way you'd know that there would be no further contact between them, no personal affection developed, nothing but acting out the fantasy. It's a better option than letting her meet a random man or a friend, who won't be in on the act.

If you google you can find some very enlightening blog posts on this or similar scenarios, unfortunately the emotional effect on the relationship takes a toll and more often than not one partner ends up hurt and regretting the choice to let it happen. You (and your wife) have to weigh up is one night of sleeping with a stranger good enough to risk anything happening to damage your relationship. Chances are it's not a strong enough fantasy to be worth it. Not to mention that it will never play out exactly how she imagines it, and in reality it could just end up being an awkward as hell fumble with another man! Sometimes the worst thing you can do with a fantasy is try to make it come true as it just won't live up to the expectations.

I hope you can talk this out with her and set your mind at ease.

+1 I agree .

Roleplaying is a 2 party game . Both parties must be happy for it to work . Roleplaying isn't for everyone otherwise we would have whole forums dedicated to it and costume shops wouldn't be able to keep up with demand. It really is a minority kink( although I don't like using this word)but it can be very enjoyable and be part of a fulfilling sex life.

thank you all for your posts. Roleplay sounds good. Talking to do!

Good on you.I am sure that your OH will enjoy it and appreciate the effort you will have to employ for it to work. Try to enjoy it as welI'll, it could be a new and exciting avenue for you both.

Good luck

Having watched porn together for yrs we arived at the shemale genre & never realy drifted far from it. This led to my wifes fantasy of us going to a venue where shemales hang out, then she wants me to wander off in search of a sexy tgirl to chat to & see her flirting with me. (thats to put it mildly! if anyone wants her gory details ask me n ill talk). Any other wives out there who have a liking to shemales? or is it just my wife being a total perve??

ask her how she feels abput it would she act upon it? is it just something she dreams avbbout but wouldnt do irl? i wouldnt worry too much as 21 years is a long time and i expect that you two have a strong bond. i would talk it though with her to see how she feels about it and then tell her your opinion and how you feel

We've talked about this kind of thing and come up with a scenario we intend to act out. We go to a hotel and have some drinks in the bar, me dressed pretty prevocatively so as to attract some appreciative glances. We go up to our room and he ties me to the bed, blindfolds me and gives me oral to the brink of orgasm but then stops. He leaves the room. A short while later the door opens again and the next thing I know I'm being taken roughly, no preliminaries. He doesn't speak at all. When both satisfied he leaves the room, all without having spoken a word. I'm never sure whether it was my OH or a stranger.

Maybe something like that could work for you guys?

That sounds good as long as the person tied to the bed and blindfolded isn't left on their own too long and maybe from a role play point of view there ought to be a reason for tieing somebody up in the first place .May be abduction, kindnapping forced etc.

Hi guys. An update😊
we tried role play in a pub. Which was good. But she was chatted up by another guy. Nothing happened, but we both found it a big turn on. Where do we go from here!
Del.