😀😀😇😇 positive thinking 👍
I'd like to add into the mix. If he's on a tour of duty, Iraq, Iran, Libya or Syria or the like, then I think really that your fury should have waited until he's home! I know only full well having had a hub as a serving soldier just how stessful the job is. Other's may be depending on his ability to think on his feet and have a clear head, their lives may depend on that fact!
So please think on, there's a bigger picture right now going on and you I'm sure would like him back safely!
How did skyping go?
I don't really see it as "harmless fun", he's gone out of his way to message somebody in such a way, and it's hurt you, that isn't right. As someone said, just because you are due to get married, it doesn't mean it is too late to walk away, and trust is a funny thing. It can take years to build and a second to break.
Try and get this cleared up as soon as possible, and then you can focus on enjoying your time together when he is home for holiday x
I'm with sugarboobies on this one. I don't see it as harmless fun, how would you feel if it happened again? For me personally this would be a deal breaker, especially if I was about to commit to spending the rest of my life with them and they had been sexting an ex. You need to have this out with him and make it clear that it's unacceptable and not to happen again.sugarboobies2232 wrote:
How did skyping go?
I don't really see it as "harmless fun", he's gone out of his way to message somebody in such a way, and it's hurt you, that isn't right. As someone said, just because you are due to get married, it doesn't mean it is too late to walk away, and trust is a funny thing. It can take years to build and a second to break.
Try and get this cleared up as soon as possible, and then you can focus on enjoying your time together when he is home for holiday x
So is Twitter not harmful? Just asking!!
That would depend on the person using it and what they're using it for. If it's an open door policy within the relationship and both parties know what is going on or what is being posted and it's all public then it doesn't need to be harmful.Ozz wrote:
So is Twitter not harmful? Just asking!!
I have to agree. Every relationship is different. Ok, I acknowledge that he didn't physical cheat, but he was reminiscing with a previous partner about their sex, both parties knowing full well that he would likely arouse the other. If this conversation happened while he's been away, chances are he pleasured himself while reminiscing. Ultimately it has caused upset, as it's not within the relationship's boundaries; and I imagine he was aware at the time that it would upset you, but didn't think you'd ever know. Understandably you're upset and your trust has been knocked. You definitely need to talk about it when he gets home, you need to be confident if your trust can be rebuilt in time for the wedding, particularly as he's away for a good while. Personally, I think I'd be tempted to postpone the wedding until I was sure, I wouldn't want the pressure of having a deadline to know if I can trust him again.Jessicaleon11 wrote:
That would depend on the person using it and what they're using it for. If it's an open door policy within the relationship and both parties know what is going on or what is being posted and it's all public then it doesn't need to be harmful.Ozz wrote:
So is Twitter not harmful? Just asking!!
Ozz wrote:
So is Twitter not harmful? Just asking!!
It can be, depending on how it is used.
Depending on how things are between you, I would personally either call the wedding off and reschedule it if you are so hurt and now you are questionning your feelings for him, I don't think it would be right to go ahead with things how they are. But, it's not my relationship.
I know he is away and is under immense pressure, he also has a duty of care to you to reassure you and do all he can to show you his love and feelings for you. I don't think that is showing you that when he is sexting an ex. Fair enough he hasn't suggest anything or arranged a meetup that you are aware of, but in my opinion if he can do this while on tour thousands of miles away, than surely it wouldn't stop him while he is home? I dated a guy for a while, while he was in Afganistan, and it is so hard on both parts. But perhaps he is only sorry he got caught. How long would this have gone on for if you didn't find out?
I keep checking back on this to see if there are any updates. Can't imagine what you're going through.
LittleSwitchBitch wrote:
Would u still be at mad if he was beside you coz the distance thing could be contributing to how hurt you are?!
Me personally, considering you have mentioned he doesn't talk like that with you... I'd be pissed off but reverse it- do you talk like that with him?! Do.you encourage him to?! Maybe turn this into a positive... Now u have seen this side to him, encourage him to talk like that with you. Explain it would help u while he's away.
He's only home for two weeks... Fuck him like never before and make him forget his ex existed 😂😂😂
Keep us updated xx
Thanks for the responses everyone. The skype conversation went well. And afterwards we talked dirty for the first time and it was so so good!
I'm not saying I'm okay with what he did but I think it was just a moment of weakness. He seems genuinely sorry. We will talk about it when he gets home but I'm not going to keep talking about it over the next couple of weeks.
I'm not postponing the wedding. I love him. Even though I'm mad about what happened, in the end it has allowed us to open up to one another.
I hope this doesn't make me sound weak. It's not like I'm going to forget about it and I will be more wary. But he's deleted her on facebook and has said it won't happen again. He will need to earn my trust back but to me it's not a dealbreaker.
As LSB says- I will fuck him for two weeks straight and send him back with only me on his mind! xx
Really pleased you are feeling better and can put this behind you. Every situation and relationship is different, I personally couldn't do it, but hats off to you both. Hope you can work past this x
+1 It's nice that you can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I couldn't do it just as quick either, but I admit I am a crazy jealous person.sugarboobies2232 wrote:
Really pleased you are feeling better and can put this behind you. Every situation and relationship is different, I personally couldn't do it, but hats off to you both. Hope you can work past this x
dotdashdot wrote:
LittleSwitchBitch wrote:
Would u still be at mad if he was beside you coz the distance thing could be contributing to how hurt you are?!
Me personally, considering you have mentioned he doesn't talk like that with you... I'd be pissed off but reverse it- do you talk like that with him?! Do.you encourage him to?! Maybe turn this into a positive... Now u have seen this side to him, encourage him to talk like that with you. Explain it would help u while he's away.
He's only home for two weeks... Fuck him like never before and make him forget his ex existed 😂😂😂
Keep us updated xx
Thanks for the responses everyone. The skype conversation went well. And afterwards we talked dirty for the first time and it was so so good!
I'm not saying I'm okay with what he did but I think it was just a moment of weakness. He seems genuinely sorry. We will talk about it when he gets home but I'm not going to keep talking about it over the next couple of weeks.
I'm not postponing the wedding. I love him. Even though I'm mad about what happened, in the end it has allowed us to open up to one another.
I hope this doesn't make me sound weak. It's not like I'm going to forget about it and I will be more wary. But he's deleted her on facebook and has said it won't happen again. He will need to earn my trust back but to me it's not a dealbreaker.
As LSB says- I will fuck him for two weeks straight and send him back with only me on his mind! xx
Yep I think you are being very mature and sensible. Talking about it as I and others have recommended is the best way forward .There is no need for a knee jerk reaction .You are both sensible adults at end of the day. Talk about it when he gets back and then if it's no worse than what you suspected then forgive him as I am a firm believer that every one deserves a second chance .
Trust can be repaired but that will take time .
Good luck