Finding it hard to orgasm

Sex Tips & Talk
23

Loves huni wrote:

im glad im not alone i start to get really stressed if i come come after a while especially if hes goin down on me and it just wont happen i start to feel really selfish and paranoid i think i may introduce sex toys more, infact i may have myself alitlle love honey shopping spree and then have to give everything a bit of a "try" :) thanks for all the help x

LH.... I would like to share with you what I have tried in the past and am about to do again due to its sucess!! ;)

this can work for various reasons i should think....

well one thing I did in the past that I noticed was when I bought a few items from LH... but kept them secretly unopened in the box in the cupboard until bedtime and until the time felt right... ie in the mood etc...

then out came the box... it was like a lucky bag I gave it to him all unopened.. his face was a picture and he was so excited it was like watching a kid at xmas... but he was also inspecting the toys/items in great detail and was quite enthusiastic about it too....

brightened both our days in more ways than one!!!

Iv got another load coming soon (pun lol!!) and cant wait this time i have lots more items with more daring things... (as im quite new to this toy thing... infact 1 year new....) iv got male masturbator and g spot teaser with lube.. iv got somesexy dress up and love eggs....

its gonna be like a hamper for him lol I cant wait...

give it a go you never know... i find it as exciting watching him open as he does using them... its mind blowing really it is...

24

Hmm difficulties orgasming... just touched briefly on this in the 'squirting' thread but I'm not as relaxed during sex as I used to be. Masturbation isn't a problem, no pressure on me so it's fine, especially with my fantastic Tracey Cox bullet! mmm loving the bullet.

I definitely get off on the clitoral stimulation rather than purely penetration, although, I can be quite greedy and like everything being stimulated at once!

With a partner I only orgasm when I let myself, I need to mentally give myself permission to 'let go'. It's a shame really as sometimes it would be quite nice to lose that control and have to cum regardless.

Maybe its a case of having to retrain myself. I did go through various stages in life which have shaped my attitudes to sex and orgasming in particular: I did think I would not have a male partner again and trained to just cum using rabbits and toys, then after a child my body changed again. ie lubrication levels, body issues etc all these have to be taken into consideration.

I find it harder to cum after I've had alcohol, i get girly brewer's droop! lol

It's easiest to cum after a long slow relaxed time of no pressure enjoyment, whether that is foreplay, massage, just chat, dirty or innocent, innuendo, teasing, feeling generally confident and built up about myself, that I have all the time in the world (time constraints just add pressure, so no sighing impatiently, partners!) and in a low lit but 'Im still visible' setting. I can cum with a bright light on but I find candles/lava lamp/floor lamp so much sexier for the right ambient setting.

Try exploring with a waterproof toy in the bath, I have my rub my ducky on the bathroom shelf for just such occasions, also small rubber butt plug and waterproof bullets. The hot water is naturally relaxing and in such a private environment it should be easier to feel comfortable enough to take your time building to a climax. In time you can invite your partner in and show them how you want it done!

xxx