I'm seeking some advice/pointers for buying my/our first toy and how to approach the subject with my partner.
A little about us: My partner and I have been together for 5 years and are both 25. I was his first, and to put it bluntly he was quite a few after my first. At the beginning our sex life was fun and healthy, as expected with any young new couple. As the years have gone on our usual 5 times in one night has dwindled down to once/twice a month due to hectic work schedules. When we are intimate there are no problems apart from it's a little vanilla and I usually have to finish my self off whilst he cleans up. This is equally both of our fault. It is rare he likes to partake in any foreplay, and for me I suffer from depression so my appetite in the bedroom is not always there.
My issue now: I have tried talking about spicing things up a little and he is aware I'm a little more adventurous than him but the subject of toys is always a no. We spoke very briefly again about this yesterday and he laughed it off and said I can get what ever I want but he doesn't want to be involved with it. At first I thought it was because he was scared a would get something quite large and use it on him but it's come apprant now he feels like I don't think he can do the job. I have reassured him but he isn't a great talker at the best of times.
My plan: I have always fantasied about having a rabbit used on me whilst I give him a blow job. Yesterday he breifly mentioned that he liked playing with me bent over him and sucking him. I thought this would be the percent time to mention the idea again but alas no was the answer. I plan on buying one for solo time anyway but has anyone just surprised their man during sex with a toy after they've said no?