Girl on girl sex

Sorry for the stupid question but it just crossed my mind for some reason.

What do you class as 'sex' when it comes to girl on girl?

Like obviously if a man went down on a girl or used sex toys on her I still wouldn't class that as 'sex'

Sorry if I sound dull :)

Many people class other things as sex, which aren't penis to vagina.

It depends on person to person. But for example I know a person who can't have sex with their penis due to medical reasons, so touching and massaging in certain ways, holds just as much importance for them.

I also know many who just don't get-off on having things inside them, regardless of these being inserted anally or vaginally.

Sex how days isn't purely focused on the genitals. Even when I did my sex educator training, we focused on other ways peope may enjoy it. Educators and teachers were taught to explain to students that it isn't just about reproduction but also thatthe pleasure side is important and that these feelings differ greatly from person to person - if it feels good and right to you, then that's god, and could be classed as sex depending on preference.

Please also note though that some girl on girl encounters are with people who don't really see themselves as a girl. I know someone who is F2M without surgery so far, but they desire to have a male penis. For them contact sexually with their partner is sex even without them having a penis currewntly.

xxxbaby wrote:

Sorry for the stupid question but it just crossed my mind for some reason.

What do you class as 'sex' when it comes to girl on girl?

Like obviously if a man went down on a girl or used sex toys on her I still wouldn't class that as 'sex'

Sorry if I sound dull :)

What I consider generally to be foreplay with a man (ie oral, fingering, touching kissing etc etc) when I've done it with a female I consider that to be having sex and that's what I would call it. But I guess it's all personal, I don't think there is a particular rule or anything! :) x

Hi xxxbaby - you don't sound dull at all Hun - I totally agree with MissChar - any type of foreplay that man would to to a woman I would think of as sexual - passionate kissing, oral, fingering and also using toys or a strap on etc. xxx

I'd say any sexual contact which involves another person which gets you aroused including use of toys, oral, mutual madsturbation is sex.
Penetrative sexual intercourse is the full on baby making bit. but the other things are still sexual acts.

However I understand where you're coming from because I have a good friend who is a lesbian and when she spoke of a girlfriend of hers saying in conversation ' oh we hadn't had sex with eachother by then' I did wonder well does that mean you've just had a snog but no touching, or a snog abd a fumble but fully clothed.

I didn't have sex with mr average until we were married. but we did a lots touchy feeley passionate snogging underneath clothes and a bit of naughty touching eachother up. I didn't class that as having sex but maybe someone else would.

mrs average wrote:

I'd say any sexual contact which involves another person which gets you aroused including use of toys, oral, mutual madsturbation is sex.
Penetrative sexual intercourse is the full on baby making bit. but the other things are still sexual acts.

However I understand where you're coming from because I have a good friend who is a lesbian and when she spoke of a girlfriend of hers saying in conversation ' oh we hadn't had sex with eachother by then' I did wonder well does that mean you've just had a snog but no touching, or a snog abd a fumble but fully clothed.

I didn't have sex with mr average until we were married. but we did a lots touchy feeley passionate snogging underneath clothes and a bit of naughty touching eachother up. I didn't class that as having sex but maybe someone else would.

The OED agrees:

defintion: sexual activity, including specifically sexual intercourse

It's not a stupid question at all, the lines are a bit more blurred when it comes to female on female interaction but i agree with MissCharl and Mrs Average. It really doesnt have to be penetrative to count as sex when its "girl on girl" so anything from licking, fingering, oral to toy play.

When i had my first bi expereince i only classed it as sex after we had oral sex even though id previously had toy play and fingering with someone but since then ive changed my mind on what is and what isnt.

Poly friends of mine from way back used to define sex as 'one or more body parts + one or more orgasms'.

Or something like that. It was a long time ago.

I agree with the others, for me sex is more than x goes in y, it includes all the build up, which would cover FF sex as well as MF :)

My view, as a bloke is

What I consider generally to be foreplay with a man (ie oral, fingering, touching kissing etc etc) when I've done it with a female I consider that to be having sex and that's what I would call it. But I guess it's all personal, I don't think there is a particular rule or anything! :) x

and I have quoted there, I did try to "quote" the post but my PC hung.

There is no "target" for achevement imho, just do whats nice and gives pleasure. It may differ between you. Heterosexual and girl-on-girl sex should be the same, so stop fudging the implied taboo of same sex fun.

No offence/combative talk implied