Help with birthmarks on buttocks

Has he ever asked you why you always cover up?

I am sure your new partner will not laugh it you. Explain your concerns to him and then embrace the birthmark together. You certainly should not be ashamed of it. I am sure he wants to be with you. A big hug from everyone here I am sure. :people_hugging: :people_hugging: :people_hugging:

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No he has never said anything about me not showing my arse at all in all the 6yrs we have been together

Thank you I have always not show my arse while being in bed ext when I get dressed I never turn round at all I just need to pluck up
The courage to say about it as he isn’t much off a talker when it comes to stuff even sex talk lol

I’ve got a brown birthmark on my butt cheek too! To be honest it had never even crossed my mind that anyone would think it’s anything other than a birth mark until someone mentioned something similar. Be proud of your body lumps bumps marks and all, it all tells a story. It’s a part of you. I know that’s easier said then done and I don’t know your situation but I’m sure he will love that you felt comfortable telling him when you do and it will be bring you closer together. If it’s any consolation my partner has seen mine many times and thinks it’s cute and makes my bum more beautiful :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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Bull by the sexy horns.

“Right, you know we always have the lights out and you’ve never seen my arse?….

It’s because it’s so awesome and unique i didn’t think you could handle it.

It’s also the reason if i line up with 20 other women bare bottoms facing you and you slap the wrong one you have some serious questions to answer”

Embrace it, as said many times we all have hang ups about lumps, bumps, marks, scars, size, weight, shape, length etc….

In a good healthy relationship they are all insignificant. If it’s been 6 years I doubt he’ll care the slightest.

I use humour a lot. Hence my “line up of bums”. Everyone is different though. Has he got any marks or anything? Just tell him yours is better.

Been with my OH many years we talk very openly about everything.

Again, 6years together. Lights on or off. Discreetly getting dressed whatever. Very possible he has already seen in and not said anything because it doesn’t really matter.

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@Mumof4 he won’t care. Honestly, he won’t.

If he is really into you, he’ll just see it as another unique, wonderful part of you.

I’m going to guess either you decided years ago it was ‘yucky’, or a previous partner pointed it out and maybe made you feel self-conscious and ever since you’ve felt you have to hide it?

You don’t. It’s all in your head. If he makes you feel awful, he’s an assh*le and isn’t worth your time.

My OH has been battling an insecurity about part of her body since she was a teenager which, to me, is so unnecessary and so wide of the mark. But it’s crippled her and prevented us from being truly intimate. It makes her hold back, when all I want is for her to let it go.

You’re beautiful. Believe it.
He won’t care!!

:heart:

@KentCouple1990 i so second this!!

So many people are afraid to be vulnerable, but it’s vulnerability and honesty which brings us closer.

If @Mumof4 can be honest about feeling insecure about it, her man should understand and tread carefully.

Nothing to lose, all to gain!!

So much this!!!

What a strange shift in tone.

You start off saying this -

Then your attitude switches to this -

Have you ever considered he’s seen it and simply doesn’t care? Respectfully, no man is with a woman for 6 years and hasn’t seen her arse.

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Do you think your reluctance to show your bum is a result of knowing that your BF has a tendency to be mean/insulting about such things or does it come from your own lack of self confidence about your body? From what you’ve said, I feel like it is the latter. When you say ‘make fun’, do you mean a little joke or outright bullying? Most people in relationships rib each other about things but, if you are very sensitive about the issue and feel like even a little joke would upset you (which is totally your prerogative, we all have our hang-ups) , the best thing to do is talk to him about it.

I’m sure the last thing he would want to do it upset you, so a little chat about it might be the best thing to do to move forward. It might make you feel vulnerable but that’s the sort of things we need to do to strengthen relationships and be happy in them. Also, at his age, he should be mature enough to realise when to keep his mouth shut (especially if the reward is getting to see your bum!) so if you tell him not to make a joke out of it he should respect that.

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I find this really odd and tend to agree with @AJ82 that he’s probably seen it and it didn’t occur to him to care about it.

I think its natural for couples to take the piss out of each other but I’d really like to think that at 47 yrs old that he’d have the maturity and emotional intelligence to not make fun of you about something you’re sensitive about.

I hope you can talk to him about it and gain confidence from that to love your whole body. And uninhabited sex really is elite.

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I know it’s easier said than done but trust me when I say your partner really won’t care about it if he really loves you and maybe even will love you even more for having a unique quality to your bum :slightly_smiling_face:

There are of course supposed treatments you can have done what reduces or even clears skin blemishes away should you wish to go down that route. I’ve been doing research myself for things in the past…

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