helloo, so im a virgin and recently bought a dildo off love honey because...why not. howeverrr i cannot get it inside of me as it hurts too much even with lube, i’ve put things and fingers up there before but they were quite thin so it was easier, this dildos got a 5.5 inch circumference and i cannot get it in for the life of me. i’m a pretty petite person and my vaginas quite small so should i of gotten a smaller dildo first ?? to be fair i can only really fit two/three fingers inside of me (i don’t really ever penetrate myself with my fingers because i’ve got small hands so it just doesn’t do it for me hhaha) so i’m not sure why i thought a dildo with a 5.5 inch circumference would be a good starter choice. i’ve been all turned on and everything when i tried and i thought it would kind of just slip right in but i was just mistaken and in pain. help. thanks :)

Hello and welcome to the forum.

You have purchased a more expert toy in my opinion; a size that even some experienced people would struggle with as we are all diferent shapes and sizes. I would advise that you should purchase a smaller toy as you certainly don't want to hurt yourself and no amount of lube is going to help if the toy is simply too big.

The plus side to this purchase is that you now have an idea of size to compare to. All dildos on here state a size (LH are super helpful if you can't find it); also you could work your way up to that size in the long run if it was of interest to you.

Do some research and comparisons and read reviews. If you are unsure on what to go for or where to start, just shout out; we are a friendly bunch with lots of experience and products tried and tested, just tell us a little more about your preferences eg budget, material, colour if that matters etc

Have fun and I hope to see you around.

Hello and welcome 🙂

I agree with KinkyMinxMoo, this one seems a little large for you. But if this one is too girthy there's plenty of thinner ones you can try. 👍There's a Lovehoney guide that covers some of the dildo basics which you my find useful:

And, depending on how recently you bought the toy, you could swop it using the Happiness Promise. 👍🙂 Here's a bit more info:

Mrs Chimp loves glass dildos, so they're the ones we know more about. This particular one is 3½ inches in circumference. 👍


I have been using toys from Lovehoney for some years now and am still a virgin. I do enjoy toys of that girth so I'm sure it's something you could work towards if you wanted, as others have said. You mention you are turned on when you try to insert it but have you tried after you have already orgasmed from something smaller or external stimulation? Ian Chimp mentiomed glass and that can certainly be easier to insert and usually feels bigger than it is once inserted because of the firmness. If the one you have now is silicone there can be a lot of difference between different silicones, some are a lot more 'draggy' so it might be worth experimenting with different materials. Have fun exploring and if you need more recommendations everyone here is happy to help.

Just to say that it WILL hurt but once you break that barrier it no longer hurts.

Despite gymnastics, horse and bike riding and using tampons my first time was extremely painful. My ex was quite large but we decided to just push on and after that really painful first experience it did get a lot easier. I can still remember that pain, though.

I've spoken to quite a few female friends about losing virginity and it seems that for some it's a lot easier with little pain, with others, it's horribly painful. Some bleed a lot, others not at all. It must be one of the many quirks of the human body.

Unfortunately, it's one of those things that in my experience, you have to grit your teeth and get it over with.

I agree with the recommendation of glass as the last thing you need is drag making it harder. Trying after an orgasm may also help.