How did you go about selecting your first item? and.....

This is a very open question really, but I am intrigued to know what made people decide they wanted to purchase a toy, or anything else for that matter?

Do some people find it hard to bring up the subject with partners etc?

I know somebody who's partner has recently ready the 50 shades triology, and he has been waiting for her to come around to the subject of bondage for ages. They now are exploring bondage quite a lot ;)

Could a book really help people to accept this alternative life?

Do you feel embarrased about owning sex toys? If so why?

I appologise for my spelling and also for the number of questions, but when i start thinking I like to here other peple views :)

Thanks ;) x

I don't know what made me want a sex toy first of all, I think it was the need of wanting something more than I was giving myself and not wanting to sleep wth someone to get it.

I didn't have a problem bringing it upto my partner, before we even got together he knew what I liked and that I owned sex toys.

My partner was mostly vanilla, I am not but since he read Erotic books he opened up a lot more, whilst reading the books he read things that turned him on and excited him which made him then want to try him, so books can really help them to open up a little bit more.

I'm not embarrassed about owning sex toys, and I own more than the avergae person does. It's somewhat of a mission now to find a toy better than my best one lol.

My OH showed me the OH site after she found it. She had just been reading 50 Shades and it changed her sex interest.

We sat together and the first thing I chose from LH for her was black satin clothing, as I believed she would look stunning in it. A mutual decision that proved so right.

Answer to first question - definitely yes - I can personally confirm it;

Answer to second question - no - quite frankly I don't give a damm. I consider the concept of embarrisment to be one of lack of confidence. Why care about other's restrictive outlooks if you are doing nothing illegal or immoral

I have been with my partner for seven years meaning I was 15 when we got together. I had never owned a sex toy and when I said I wanted to try one he was happy to let me, I was embarssed but he thought it would be good for me to find what pleased me.

To the second question yes! My OH and I have always played with bondage and I was reluctatnt to read it but it did offer me new ideas and some new toys. Also last year I ended up having a conversation with a lecturer (of literature) about the book and the exploration of sexuality in lit which I don't think would have happened without it.

Only the once and to my OH but never again I'm proud of myself and so I don't see why I should be ashamed by my sexuality.

I found LoveHoney by accident really, I can't tell the whole story without getting into trouble here, so I'll go by selection. I looked at a few guides to selecting a first toy, big mistake. I'd say go by reviews, especially the bad ones if they all highlight the same fault. Also try and get as opinions on the toy as possible.

I was lead to this site when i typed in google a toy i was intrested in for reviews, so glad i did never go anywhere else xx

Was in an LDR and wanted something besides my fingers and imagination. Went searching on the internet and found a massive LH sale. :-) Which meant the prices were so much better than anywhere else, but more than that was the amount of information available. The other sites were just vague sales pitches.

How did I select my first one? I didn't. Narrowed it down to three and since they were on clearance.... :-)

My mum bought me my first toy (that was embarrassing) after my first serious relationship broke down. I never used it for a while then eventually gave in to my curiosity and never went back. I am not embarrassed about using toys, I dont tell everyone but my mum knows I have ordered more since she got one for me. Also a few others know.

I liked idea of bondage before the 50 shades trilogy however it did help me broach subject with OH at the time.

I found lovehoney through exs friend joking bout us using toys. He made a comment about how we were "probably always on that lovehoney site" so I went home googled it and made first order.

I bought my first toys just to experiment and see what it felt like! I bought a basic rabbit and one of those Rocks Off bullets.

My partner was living with me at the time and he wasn't impressed at first - he had the 'why would you want something to replace me' attitude but he opened up a little when he found he was 'bigger' than anything I bought. That was a few years ago, and we've been long distance most of the time since then because of work commitments so my toy collection has expanded dramatically. I thought he had no interest/was a bit turned off by them so never asked if we could play together, and then recently out of the blue he suggested it which has been awesome!

I haven't read 50 Shades but before that came out we had been experimenting with bondage, it's one of my biggest turn ons. When he lived in Manchester we used to go to shopping at a few Fetish market events which were great fun. We have yet to visit a dungeon (the one near me has shut down) or sex club, even though I am totally up for that some day.

I guess the books have made the lifestyle a bit more acceptable and mainstream, even though from what I've heard from others, 50 Shades isn't a particularly accurate or safe representation of it.

I am not at all embarrassed about owning sex toys and talk openly about them to friends, although I probably would blush a bit if a family member went through my collection!

Spoonerism wrote:

I guess the books have made the lifestyle a bit more acceptable and mainstream, even though from what I've heard from others, 50 Shades isn't a particularly accurate or safe representation of it.

I'll trust others who say it isn't accurate and the relationship depicted isn't remotely safe. Far too much in common with what happens in abusive relationships, like being forced into secrecy about what's going on. He's too unstable to be a dom and she's too naive and smitten to consent. But he's handsome and wealthy and hot and she's convinced she's in love, so it's all good.

No, just no.

This is an interesting thread to watch develop, as I don't own any sex toys at all myself and sometimes wonder if it would be worth investing in some kind of masturbatrixy thing. Or something anal to play with.