Forgive me for my naivety but what is a BDSM session and what does it entail? I’m intrigued and interested. I feel like there is so much out the to explore, I feel as though I’m missing out! Also, thank you all for the advice. I am going to purchase a few goodies and try and get him involved that way.
We all have to start somewhere so no worries at all. There IS so much to explore. My OH and I are entrenched in the BDSM and we are still actively exploring everything there is to other. A BDSM session could be anything within the world of Kink really, I probably mistakenly used it as a general term rather than the actual term i meant being 'Play Session' or 'Scene'.
An example would be what we have recently explored, which is Orgasm Denial / Control Training w/ bondage; Where I tie her up, Tie a vibe so it is constantly pressed against her clit and time her while she begs me to allow her to come with the expectation that she can last longer each session.
The only limitation is imagination. So if you like to be imaginative, the sky is the limit :),
When it's just us together, it's usually around half an hour unless we're having a quickie. When we swing at our, or our friends' places, a session can last up to 4 hours. Lots of foreplay then MF, FF when the men are recovering, then MF again and so on. We're not into BDSM, so it's just sex.
It really does depend on what we are doing. We can have 5 minute quickies or we can have sessions that last over an hour.
Kinky Mira, I finally had sleepy anal this morning- no idea how you stay asleep!!!! I was awake within seconds lol! But that lasted around 15-20 minutes :-)
It really depends on the situation, if it’s a quickie on the kitchen table then around 10-15 minutes of fast and aggressive sex. If it’s a bedroom session then we would average around an hour to 90 or so minutes. We have played and had fun for around 3 hours when we have got the ropes and things out, but usually that’s when it’s all quite emotional and we have gone through a hard time needing to rekindle things. I would say 15-20 minutes is average for most couples, unfortunately people learn what “works” and they just use the same methods over and over which becomes more of a chore and can be boring. If you can talk with your partner then maybe discuss role play ideas or some light bondage or toy play?. Maybe you can wear some sexy lingerie or a costume and tease him with kisses and touching, once he wants to get to the final frontier then simply say “not yet” and make sure he works for it with a long oral session for you. Don’t ever be afraid to take the reigns in the bedroom, you have just as much control as your partner and if that means you want longer oral or teasing then say so.
My lady and I usually have plenty of time on our hands, so we sometimes decide to have a day-long session. This might begin with an oily massage, or her watching me masturbate (which really gets her hot) before starting on the hardcore stuff. We might take a breather in between really energetic action, before another fiercely energetic go. Maybe a lunch break before we are back at it. We have even had a "nightcap" quickie before finally collapsing into a deep sleep. In complete contrast, we have had the occasional 3 minute quickie just after I have woken her in the morning. Its whatever suits the occasion.
It really does depend on what we are doing. We can have 5 minute quickies or we can have sessions that last over an hour.
Kinky Mira, I finally had sleepy anal this morning- no idea how you stay asleep!!!! I was awake within seconds lol! But that lasted around 15-20 minutes :-)
To be fair, I have no idea either. I'm not asleep, but I'm not exactly awake, I'm sort of in a dream zone.
I've surmised that it is because I'm comfortable and relaxed with my husband, and I know I'll be safe, so my subconscious doesn't feel the need to wake me up totally.
Me and my wife Have sex on average once a week With having two young children and both of us working full time we are too knackered some nights for any fun lol Our sessions usually last between one hour and two with lots of teasing, kissing, oral and massaging where I get her to the point of climaxing but stopping just before she does doing this repeatedly drives her mad begging me to let her go all the way We bough bed restraints on here and she loves putting me in them while she sits on my face teasing me by playing with my cock We do try mix it up a bit we don’t want to make it a routine on the same days etc so we try have spur of the moment sex like the other day in the middle off making lunch kids at school she took a half day which I didn’t expect she cone home so horny. Or another out the blue was the other day while she was in shower I sneaked in bathroom into shower with her
We average around thirty minutes but this is calculated by looking at the two extremes of our lovemaking sessions. I quickly knee trembler in a far from private place has lasted around five minutes but was very satisfying and erotic if a little rushed. It we plan some us time it can last a couple of hours as it involves stripping massage bathing dressing up and toy use etc. So as you see it’s difficult for most people to give a definitive time like it’s the same time each coupling. 😀
Everyone different I think it depends on ones stamina I am lucky I can cum serve times without the use of drugs and remain hard but making sure that our love making is that love making a mix of foreplay love making more foreplay remembering that sex shouldn’t just me in and out it’s about the passion ensuring both of you are pleased! My biggest turn on is giving my OH big bangs that said I’m not saying do every persition in the book but take the lead at times! Remind your guy what it used to be like just because u grow as a couple doesn’t mean it shouldn’t still be fun and exciting! Ild recommend asking him about his deepest fantasies are may be to do or have done to him! And let him express this without fear of judgement and you do the same! You may discover new sides of each other you never knew and that may make things seem more exciting to him also! Best of luck
My wife and I rarely have casual sex or quickies. Most of the time there is a tremendous amount of foreplay as I use many items I set out for that part. I do know we usually go a minimum of an hour and most of the time on a weekend night two to three hours of play in general. If we go to the room where I have set up our BDSM items it will definately be 2 to 3 hours. That would be the norm but that includes costme wear, bdsm ,etc