I found this quote today
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
what do you think, profound or complete bull?
or in a similar vein
There is one pain I often feel, which you will never know. It is caused by the absence of you
I am currently in a long distance relationship and I'm really surprised by how strong our relationship is. I've been in a LDR before but it was an utter disaster. If your relationship doesn't have a solid foundation of trust, honesty and communication then the distance will destroy it.
Here are some of my favourite quotes about distance...
"Distance is not for the fearful, it is for the bold. It's for those who are willing to spend a lot of time alone in exchange for a little time with the one they love. It's for those knowing a good thing when they see it, even if they don't see it nearly enough."
"Missing someone gets easier everyday because even though you are one day further from the last time you saw them, you are one day closer to the next time you will."
'Distance never separates two hearts that really care, for our memories span the miles and in seconds we are there. Whenever I start feeling sad because I miss you, I remind myself how lucky I am to have someone so special to miss.'
gunther wrote:
I found this quote today
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
what do you think, profound or complete bull?
It's one of those quotes whose language probably doesnt have to be so extravagent (I'm guessing it's an old quote?) but whose sentiment is definately spot on.
all very true quotes.
doesn't make the pain and fustration of looking at the calender and seeing you still have far longer than you would like, however you count the days, befor you see them again any easier.
for all of you in LDRs i shair you troubles and hope they survive the distance for when they do, you know they are truly worth it :)
The quotes are true, and as said LDR's work...however need a lot of trust and understanding between the 2 parties. I was in one for about a year, we now live together (and have fo 3 years), so they can work for while at least :)
YoungEssexCouple wrote:
The quotes are true, and as said LDR's work...however need a lot of trust and understanding between the 2 parties. I was in one for about a year, we now live together (and have fo 3 years), so they can work for while at least :)
I'd be going crazy if we didn't have some sort of deadline in mind for when the distance will be over. To just be stuck in an endless long distance relationship would make me feel completely hopeless!
gunther wrote:
I found this quote today
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
what do you think, profound or complete bull?
I think definitely profound. Alex and I were in a long-distance relationship for the first 2 years, we've been living together for a year now, and are getting married in 3 weeks! It was so so tough being away from each other most of the time, but it really does make us truely appreciate each others company now.
Unfortunately though I think it can also enkindle the small... I was in a relationship previously which involved 2 years of long distance, but when we finally moved in together I couldn't stand being with him that often and we broke up (after a horrible year together trying to make it work).
I think the difference being between the two, I knew Alex inside and out before starting into the relationship with him (we used to go out at school, and have been very close friends since the age of about 12!) so I knew that I would be happy to live with him eventually.
Lucy x
But I guess you do sometimes have to just take a chance and hope that a long-distance relationship will work when you're finally not long distance anymore. But just be prepared to call it a day if it's not, I wish I had done sooner rather than dragging it out. I knew within a month of living together that it wasn't going to work, but after putting so much into the relationship already it was very difficult to just give up on it straight away.
Lucy x
acoupleofwankers wrote:
gunther wrote:
I found this quote today
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
what do you think, profound or complete bull?
I think definitely profound. Alex and I were in a long-distance relationship for the first 2 years, we've been living together for a year now, and are getting married in 3 weeks! It was so so tough being away from each other most of the time, but it really does make us truely appreciate each others company now.
Unfortunately though I think it can also enkindle the small... I was in a relationship previously which involved 2 years of long distance, but when we finally moved in together I couldn't stand being with him that often and we broke up (after a horrible year together trying to make it work).
I think the difference being between the two, I knew Alex inside and out before starting into the relationship with him (we used to go out at school, and have been very close friends since the age of about 12!) so I knew that I would be happy to live with him eventually.
Lucy x
Before you lived with your ex were there any warning signs that it might not work out?
AliMc wrote:
YoungEssexCouple wrote:
The quotes are true, and as said LDR's work...however need a lot of trust and understanding between the 2 parties. I was in one for about a year, we now live together (and have fo 3 years), so they can work for while at least :)
I'd be going crazy if we didn't have some sort of deadline in mind for when the distance will be over. To just be stuck in an endless long distance relationship would make me feel completely hopeless!
I have mixed feelings, almost all my old friends are divorced or separated despite always being at home together.so that isnt a guarantee that things will work. Also sometimes when we go out I see couples who obviously have nothing anymore to say to each other. I wouldnt like to be like that either.
ShaftMaster wrote:
gunther wrote:
I found this quote today
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
what do you think, profound or complete bull?
It's one of those quotes whose language probably doesnt have to be so extravagent (I'm guessing it's an old quote?) but whose sentiment is definately spot on.
Well it was by Roger de Rabutin, Comte de Bussy (13 April 1618 – 9 April 1693), and obviously a translation, personally I love beautiful words.
AliMc wrote:
acoupleofwankers wrote:
gunther wrote:
I found this quote today
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
what do you think, profound or complete bull?
I think definitely profound. Alex and I were in a long-distance relationship for the first 2 years, we've been living together for a year now, and are getting married in 3 weeks! It was so so tough being away from each other most of the time, but it really does make us truely appreciate each others company now.
Unfortunately though I think it can also enkindle the small... I was in a relationship previously which involved 2 years of long distance, but when we finally moved in together I couldn't stand being with him that often and we broke up (after a horrible year together trying to make it work).
I think the difference being between the two, I knew Alex inside and out before starting into the relationship with him (we used to go out at school, and have been very close friends since the age of about 12!) so I knew that I would be happy to live with him eventually.
Lucy x
Before you lived with your ex were there any warning signs that it might not work out?
Probably yes, looking back now I would say definitely yes. But at the time I felt in love and had basically blanked these things out of my mind. Even before we were living together when I felt our relationship was the strongest, if I was ever really upset he couldn't comfort me properly and didn't really "get" me. I used to call Alex and chat things through with him instead... So yes. But I was completely blind to it.
AliMc wrote:
I'd be going crazy if we didn't have some sort of deadline in mind for when the distance will be over. To just be stuck in an endless long distance relationship would make me feel completely hopeless!
I was going mad, the weeks felt like months although I have loads of faith and trust, I always worried that she might find someone closer that she'd settle for. I couldn't cope with it and quit my job and moved. Fortunately I got a new job within no time and it worked out great, sometimes relationships need one of the other to take a blind leap
My boyfriend and I were long distance for the first year of our relationship, almost to the day. It was really hard, we only got to see each other once a month at most, and neither of us had the internet or had much money to afford long phone calls so we relied on texts and email from our local libraries/friends' houses whenever we could. Thankfully after the first year he moved and we got a flat together, that was almost four years ago and I'm so glad we persisted with the long distance thing! I would say though, we did know each other pretty well before we got together, we'd been friends online for a couple of years so we weren't total strangers, I don't know if that had any effect on things.
We have the same past Imogen 
So we do! And we both ended up in a good place because of it 
After 3 years of a 175 mile LDR me and my gf have pretty much broken up..it's just become too much really, not just the distance but it really doesn't help..a lot of things have gone on besides but the fact that she is so far away excacerbates problems and leaves you unable to sort them out properly. add to the fact that she has no plans to move to me and I absolutely do not wish to move from where I currently am and the relationship was left pretty much dead in the water :(
While not exactly long distance as such, we face many of the same issues as we don't live together, we are in different towns and both work stupid shifts, so when we are together we make sure its quality time, been together a year so far and its still as great as it was when we first met. Always talk at least 3 times a day, on the phone, emailing, talk about everything, i'm more open with him than i've ever been in a relationship.
We also did long distance for 3 years of our....ooh, nearly 7 year relationship. We would see each other once a month so not too bad but difficult nontheless. I would agree with the intial quote - I've seen relationships torn apart by distance and some have been strengthened by it. For me, I wouldn't change how we started despite it being tough as there were a lot of benefits as well. But now we live together are engaged and are currently trying to get a place of our own :).
Adx