Long distance relationships?

A recent reply to one of @Natalie posts references long distance relationships. Has one ever worked out for you long term? I will be honest and say my wife and I were originally 6 hours apart by car for about a year. It became too much and we sold both houses and now live where we do out in the country. I can see it working with a “friend with benefits” but not a true relationship. Have you been able to make it work?

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For a part of our marriage, my ex husband and I were apart for about 18 months, due to us living in different countries. We saw each other every 3 months before we were in the same country again. We talked every day, but I changed, he changed and the distance and time apart really highlighted our differences. The marriage should’ve ended before it even got to that point, but I eventually hung up my ring about 5 years after we were back in the same country. I did hard time in that relationship.

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Thanks for sharing @JoCat . I did long distance trucking for a year and just the two weeks away put a strain on our relationship even though we started apart in the beginning.

BTW… quit agreeing with me and let’s get back to our arguments. Way more fun.

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Quit* :crazy_face:

LOL… post edited.

Relationships or sex? I have kids I’d never leave behind so anything more than an hour for a relationship is not gonna happen.

For FWB it might be different.

If the other person was mobile and unconnected to other people I might wonder why.

You give me way too much credit! More than I deserve!

And for the record, as someone who has been married and then did a long distance marriage straight away… I don’t advocate for it

From my experience of trying to widen my radar, it tends to end up running dry eventually as you can only talk so much before the conversation gets repetitive and the trust starts to wonder :face_with_spiral_eyes:

Ahem, young lady. You know I’m not letting that kind of talk fly by me :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:

I’ve a had a few long-distance relationships in my time, but none successfully. One was 2.5 years, from another country, disolved in a weekend because his Mum made him choose between her or me.

One four hours apart, intensely submissive. Nice enough guy but we wouldn’t have worked.

Hubby and I were 15 minutes apsrt by bus if you can call that a long distance lol.

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To add a completely different take on this, I met someone nearly 20 years ago, started going out with her, we were living in different cities - 3 hours away door to door, probably saw each other 3 weekends in 4. This went on for over 6 years until we married and moved in together. Another 13 years and 2 children later we’re still going strong.

I think the distance, although frustrating at times did keep things fresh and in a way made the marriage and moving in together feel even more exciting.

So yes they don’t work for a lot of people but really did in our case.

My current one started long distance! We lived in separate states (AU), almost 13 hours away, and OH approached me online when I wasn’t really looking for anyone (seems the best partners pop up at that point).

Didn’t meet in person until around the 4-5 month mark? Now we’re currently living together (I moved from where I was towards the end of last year) and celebrated our anniversary back in March :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

Both of us have similar opinions and goals in life regarding family and lifestyle, and just clicked from day one.

Intimacy was probably the toughest aspect of being long distance. But we made it work. Had some arguments here and there, but we were open and honest from the start, so we’ve always talked things through and resolved it fairly quick. The open honesty also meant we had complete trust in each other.

Being in person is much better though, the 6 months between visiting and moving in was the hardest, especially with all my uni, housing and health stress I was going through :sob: But my OH was super supportive, even from a distance, I felt supported.

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:kissing_heart: Not sure if people call me young too often (or think of me much of a lady :wink:)

I did a couple of years or marriage with a 4 hour gap in between :pleading_face::sob::cry:

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When I was younger I suppose I had a long distance relationship well to me it was long distance at the time, We could really only see each other at weekends it soon fizzled out.

I’ve never been much of a lady either, and definitely not passing for “young” so much these days :joy:

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@Tenshadesandme Who can really say what a lady is meant to be….There are some days I feel more girly and other days I feel more blokey…. I’m not too stressed about labels, names and identities. I’m just Nat :kissing_heart:

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I’m a tomboy though and through, but you better believe I can don a dress and a smokey eye when I want to. I think one of the biggest challenges I faced with this whole gender debate these days is “what am I?”. What is a woman? None of us really can label it, but some of us are, and some of us aren’t. I am a woman, just not always a feminine woman :slight_smile:
*
Also, when I was young my mother used to draw distinctions between a “lady” and a woman"; a lady being more modest and polite and a woman, well, is a woman. Having always been taught and schooled into acting like a lady, let me just say, and probably much like you, I definitely prefer being a woman :stuck_out_tongue:

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@Tenshadesandme I love how supportive and compassionate you are. I won’t unpack my journey here, but just enough to share that I don’t necessarily feel like I fit too many boxes, labels, genders or expectations.
I’m happy just expressing myself as Natalie. Someone who is discovering their own story, tries to be positive and is always happy to pull on a cute pair of boots or heels before heading out. :kissing_heart: :heart:

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Distance… or time issues?

@be3169 Distance was the issue neither of us,was driving then, and a bus only got you half way then you would have to walk the rest. One time I was late getting back home and the bus just left as I got there lol

:heart:

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