Needing confidence

As im aproaching 30 im just not feeling the same sexy girl i was 10years ago i used to be so adventurous but now i have a child etc it feels like a chore rather then fun … can anyone recommend anything to feel sexy and good about myself again i know age is just a number but as your body changes your confidence does too … i just need a boost and hope im not the only one who feels like this


Do you masturbate?if so, I’d suggest going back to basics and relearning your body, what turns you on, what doesn’t.
Ask your partner to try some things.
I used to be hung up about my body. I’ve got my forties and it’s been a bit of an eye opener. I just said to my Mr that I should be having the best sex of my life and that I don’t want to live a life of regrets. I am up for pretty much most things.

Your partner loves you for who you are. You just need to reconnect with your sexy side. Communication, relearning and loving yourself and introduce something new to the bedroom can all help.

Best of luck and good fucking!

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Have a read of the “Body Confidence” topics, i’m sure you"ll find a lot of helful replies there. Honestly, us blokes love you ladies for you, not what you were 10 years ago. :slight_smile:


My OH recently turned 40 and we have two kids.

I try to help her to understand that I find her as sexy as I ever have done as often as possible. One thing that boosts her confidence is purchasing lingerie and seeing the effect that this has one me. As a male, you can’t fake the response if you know what I mean!

Also the fact that I like to take photos of her and store them securely for my own pleasure helps her to truly believe how attractive I find her.

Masturbating together, also helps massively in this regard.

If these are things you are comfortable with, give them a go, they worked for us!

All the best!


This might help you it does for me, I like dressing up in anything sexy even if it’s under clothes.

Just walking around in them makes me feel sexy.

Then I start taking off my clothes bit by bit and take photos of each stage.

It’s ok to go through these sort of phases and learning to adjust by refunding the inner love for yourself can be tricky but defo isn’t impossible.

First things are to try retrain your mind in the way you see yourself by spending time looking in the mirror at your body and picking out features you find positive no matter how small it might be… also get your partner involved too and ask them what they find most attractive about you :slightly_smiling_face:

Try treating yourself to some new lingerie and maybe even go to a store what offers a fitting service so you can get the right style for your body shape.

Then as a big booster maybe consider having a boudoir photo shoot done simply for yourself so you can have a lovely pamper day and gain a set of photos to show how beautiful a person you still are, then whenever you have a down day you can get them photos out and remember that :kissing_smiling_eyes:


Firstly let me assure you, you are BEAUTIFUL.
Secondly let me explain that your body has just gone through some massive changes, you’re a new parent and you’re most likely exhausted so sex is bound to be the last thing on your mind right now!!!

What can you do? Well give yourself time, let your body relax and maybe relearn what it is that you like. Tell your partner how you feel and try to spend some time together to reunite a little and rekindle that passion.

Also, little tip from me is kegel balls. Wear them to tone up post pregnancy but also - they get you aroused so by wearing them you’ll feel in the mood and nobody need know but you.
Also - try reading sexy stories or erotic fiction :slight_smile:

You know what helped me?
I had some time alone, just for myself, only me in the house. I poured a glass of wine and filmed myself.
When I watched that video after, I saw how beautiful I am, how can I keep this only for myself? I’m sure you’re beautiful too! You have to show yourself, appreciate your body, it gives you so much pleasure! :two_hearts::two_hearts::two_hearts:


Laura is slightly older than you, as am I we are the same age, 4 kids later, she’s still the most beautiful women in the world to me, confidence comes from within, in my personal opinion if you want to feel more confident so why makes you happy and with that will come confidence, just remember it doesn’t matter what other people think. Others think things about everyone, people reading this may think I’m wrong everyone has an opinion no matter what, Chuck it in the fu** it bucket and just do you. I hope you find the confidence you are looking for as everyone deserves to feel it!