Never had an orgasm

Okay so I'm 25 and have never actually reached an orgasm. I'm looking some help and advice on toys etc to use to try help during sex and alone
Really beginning to think it's never gonna happen

Probably won't make you feel any better but I'm 42 and hadn't either. I put this mainly down to the abusive long-term relationship I was in until last year.

However, finally single (and much happier) and discovering more about myself. Invested in the LH beginners rabbit and finally made it aquaintence today....blimey!

I'm sure some of the more 'expert' members here will give you more advice, but from someone who is currently on a voyage of discovery my tips would be; Take your time and don't give up. Find time and space for yourself. Try new things. Relax and enjoy

As Alicia has said I would definitely stop seeing orgasm as the main goal, when I first started playing solo I had absolutely no expectations, to the point that I just wanted to see if I could even make anything feel pleasurable. I had no expectation that I would ever be able to orgasm so was actually shocked the first time I did and still see each time as a bonus, unless you are very lucky orgasm is over pretty quickly, as long as what I am doing feels good then i’m mostly happy, if it doesn’t happen sometimes then I don’t overthink it, there’s so many things that effect our ability to get there.

I rarely go into a session with the mind set of “I want an orgasm”, I crave the sensations before and the build up.

Have fun exploring what feels good, try different toys, different pressure (hard rubs vs soft brushes) different temperatures and different parts of your body. Let your mind wander, there are no good or bad fantasies have fun exploring your imagination at the same time as your body.

Hope some of that helps.

Hi Njr12,

I'm double your age and even though I was having loads of sex and adentures when I was on my twenties, I'm not ashamed to say I never had an orgasm until much later. I felt a bit frustrated, but I thought the best course of action for me at the time was to have sex (safe) with everyone I fancied as I was single and without major commitments such as a family of my own. Unfortunately, quantity was not the best thing as I was clearly missing out.

The orgasms started to happen just when I overcame a few tabboos and started to masturbate a lot and really got to know my body. I wish I had someone who could tell me that's it's not only ok, but it's actually better invest in a few good toys rather than sleep with someone just for the sake of it. I've learnet that I can't orgasm just through penetrative sex and I need a lot of clitoral stimulation and really enjoy the buid up and let it go, then a wonderful orgasm happens.

Like Alicia suggested a nice clit vibe would be a good choice. My first orgasm (and believe me it took by surprise and was absolutely beautiful) was with a simple, battery operated bullet. I'll never forget that. Last, but not least, enjoy the journey and accept that sometimes an orgasm doesn't happen and that's also ok.

Good luck.

Njr12 wrote:

Okay so I'm 25 and have never actually reached an orgasm. I'm looking some help and advice on toys etc to use to try help during sex and alone
Really beginning to think it's never gonna happen

Hi Njr12, Welcome to the forums. Quick question because it’s not on your profile. Are you looking for orgasms of the Male or Female persuasion? Also what have you tried already and what ideas excite you?

I hope you enjoy your stay here so we can celebrate your successes with you X

Hi, welcome to the Forum.

Hi + welcome, I think that you have some good advice above; take your time and relax as the more that you are willing it it stressing about it, the less likely it is to happen. Also, just have fun; you don't need to orgasm for that (Although I do understand that that is what you're after).

Hi Njr12, welcome to the forum, there's lots of good advise here so good luck :-)