Newbie to "experiencing an orgasm"....

Hello everyone, I first experienced orgasms when I was in my early 20's with only one boyfriend, had other boyfriends, but none "hit the spot" so to speak. lol!.

I'm now 43 and despite being married for many years have never had an orgasm as my husband disliked sex and intimacy so it never happened with him... That's a very long story tho - for a totally different thread me thinks!!!! I know now that he was asexual.

However I have a very loving partner now and have experienced some amazing orgasms, the first which happened a few months ago... Totally surprised me I have to say and I even felt embarrassed about it as I couldn't control myself... Yes I know that is probably normal, but not for me if that makes sense....

I know feel kinda dirty in a way - like a cat on heat at times and that I almost feel I have got to orgasm everytime we are intimate with each other..... which he wants anyway!!!! But his touching me at times doesn't quite hit the spot despite him trying - which makes me feel bad as he has made me orgasm many times using his fingers... however a couple of sex toys we have do hit the spot everytime... so now I am feeling bad that it needs a sex toy to make me orgasm....

Yes I know I'm stoopid and I know I have got some learning to do - so can some of you offer me some advice please?

relax and just enjoy

Naked_butler wrote:

relax and just enjoy

I will second that!

3rd that to, and reading your post i think we need to just relax to and the advice above is simple but spot on! :)

There is nothing wrong with useing a toy to achive an orgasm. If your other half wants you to have orgasms and you want them as well, go with whatever means gets you there. Dont feel quilty about something that brings you both pleasure.