Orgasm denial, cant seem to make this work, help !

There is quite a bit of great info on the forums regarding this but none of it has been much help with our problem :( Hubby and I have been married almost 25 years and have experimented greatly within our fantastic sex life but this is something we have tried several times and we just cant get it to work properly for us. We had yet another try last night but neither of us enjoyed it much - again. Before giving up completely I thought I'd see if anyone on here has a similar issue or can offer advice.

I orgasm very quickly, what ever hubby is doing to me, usually it only takes me between 10 - 15 mins max, often a lot less.. I can then cum any number of times during a session. Hubby can read my body better than even I can and knows exactly when to stop so prevent my orgasm - but then it all goes wrong. I remain in this extremely aroused state for 15 - 20 minutes which is fine but for that time hubby cant do anything or even hardly touch me without me coming. Sounds rediculous but he cant kiss me, touch my boobs, he cant even lay a hand just gently between my legs let alone touch my clit, labia and definitely cant insert even a part of a finger with out setting me off. We love anal but again, just a slight touch there and I orgasm immediately. We have tried me playing with him during this time but the same thing happens, I only have to touch him and I cum. One time I knelt down to suck him but I accidently sat on my heel and the touch on my foot on my pussy made me cum. Last night we thought we'd try him spanking me but 2 slaps and I came.

We can leave it for a much longer period of time before starting again but he gets very little pleasure from just a quick 10 minute play and to be honest neither of us enjoy that much.All the info we've read says he should be able to bring me down from that point by gently playing or stroking me etc and then start to build me up again. To be honest, pretty much all we can do is sit and look at each other for that period of time !! I have tried to control my orgasm but I just cant - and surely that's not the point of this anyway ? We've also tried letting me have the first orgasm, and then trying to deny me any more but whilst this leaves me needing more the absolute frustration at not being able to come has gone rather as 'the edge' has been taken off.

We dont know what else we can try to make this work ? It's not a massive problem but rather just annoying, as it's something we thought we would both enjoy and sounds easy to do but isn't - at least not for us ! I suspect this is more my problem than his, he seems to be doing everything right but I just get so aroused I cant hang on . . . . I also feel badly for him as he is not getting a great deal of fun out a quick 10 minute to play just with the purpose of leaving me feeling frustrated !

Have you tried to get yourself to that same aroused state, without hubby being around? My OH has the same effect on me, my body betrays me whenever he's around & totally stops listening to me - it obeys him almost instantly which drives me nuts, because I'd love to be able to show the level of self control that he can. Anyway, for edging practice etc, I would be able to do it solo, because although masturbation feels fantastic to me, it doesn't get in my head like the OH does, it's much more physical, giving me more control of myself. Hope that made sense!