This is a bit random but it has been brought to my attention that when I call people pet names like "sweetpea" and "girly" etc. it sounds patronising and offensive. If this is the case for any one on here I'm really sorry, it is no way intended to belittle anyone. I call and am called by such names by my friends who are all different ages and I quite like it so it's never occured to me that it might be inappropriate or upsetting for anyone. I will try and avoid doing it in future but just wanted to appologise in case I really have come across as a sort-of female chauvanist pig!
Oh no hun.....hey pet names like that to me are affectionate rather than patronising. I always call ppl hun or babe etc, is just the way I am and if thats offensive then being politically correct has gone WAY too far =) Love you girly
Oh no hun.....hey pet names like that to me are affectionate rather than patronising. I always call ppl hun or babe etc, is just the way I am and if thats offensive then being politically correct has gone WAY too far =) Love you girly External Media
I do it all the time too!!! It never once crossed my mind that it's not appropriate to call someone older girly External Media I don't really think about or notice peoples ages at all!
I don't think it's political corectness, more sensitivity. I tend to just blunder along assuming everyone's fine and dandy and don't really think about possible offence that might be caused because I'm so rarely offended by things!
Darling, doll, hun, sweetie, love. I use darling much too often so trying to ween myself of it.. now I'm calling people hun!
Lol! I think a lot of us do it. Its a habit like saying "Like" at the end of a sentance, or casual swearing - I'm trying to cut down my swearing too, its becoming more frequent and doesn't sound nice when your just having a normal conversation with someone.
Nobody has really called attention to my language, but I'm noticing it myself and I don't like to come across that way, even though it just flows from my mouth naturally like that.
Yes swearing is something I definately need to cut down on, I never used to swear but since being with my OH I swear like a sailor and I just don't think it's very ladylike. Having said that I don't mind at all if other women swear, for some reason I'd just rather not do it quite so much!
I like pet names like this. I probably overanalyse stuff, but to me it shows a level of familiarity with a person that they'd call you that and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside! It makes me go "Aww, this person likes me!"
I like pet names like this. I probably overanalyse stuff, but to me it shows a level of familiarity with a person that they'd call you that and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside! It makes me go "Aww, this person likes me!"
Again yes! I've never really though about it too much but when I'm called pet names I definately feel a little bit warm and liked/loved!
I think my friend was also saying that because I'm a tomboy it all comes across as chavanistic.
I'm admitedly a bit pervy and on here I talk about sex a lot (and to some extent that's also true in real life, though obviously there's a time and a place). I've been to a couple of strip clubs and I like watching (decent) porn, I notice beautiful actresses and women in the street. Again this isn't really something I've ever considered offensive, and noone has mentioned it previously (most friends join in with the banter!). I don't think women are second-class or sex objects or anything horrible like that and I'm mortified to think that I might come across that way!
Doesn't bother me at all doll. I'm guilty of it too, do it all the time. It depends who I'm talking to what I call them. Doll, hun, honey, sweet, babe, mate.
What craziness is this sweetcheeks! Feel free to 'patronise' me any time you like KP, it's pleasant and charming to be called by what seem like affectionate terms like that. I'm not the most overflowing with self-esteem, but even I am not so insecure as to be offended by something like that! Heavens to murgatroyd! :D
Shoogalooo! Don't worry, I think most of us girls are guilty of it. It doesn't sound/read patronising to me - just endearing :)
Now that one I love! It makes me pull a very daft smily and contented face!
Thanking you for the support ummm beautiful bon-bon?! lol
xxKPxx
Jokes. :D. Tis a lovely word :) (btw, The plural of shoogaloo is 'shoogali'. )
And you are most welcome, we're all shoogali here it seems ;)
That reminds me of Mogwai!!! I want to watch Gremlins now!!!
tronic wrote:
What craziness is this sweetcheeks! Feel free to 'patronise' me any time you like KP, it's pleasant and charming to be called by what seem like affectionate terms like that. I'm not the most overflowing with self-esteem, but even I am not so insecure as to be offended by something like that! Heavens to murgatroyd! :D
It's not craziness, my friend has a lot of very understandable reasons for hating chauvanism (not that anyone I know doesn't hate it) but for her it's particularly difficult.
I guess I hadn't twigged that anything I said could be percieved as chauvanist because it's not inteneded that way and I wouldn't be offended if it was said to me. Yesterday in the bar I was called babe and all sorts by guys and girls and it didn't upset me. The very worst I thought "what a drunken wally" and that was mainly because he addressed my breasts as darlin' rather than my face!
I found being called hen by my little sister when she was 15 was odd but not from an older friend point of view, more she had adopted the speech pattern of her 15 year old friends and couldn't look at me as she said it. Usually now that she is saner (ish :P) I'm happy to be called hunni.
In bars very few people have had the balls to sweet talk me if the man is there but there are a few friends to whom I'll answer most forms of address. One guy calls everyone luv, chuck, chicken another lass calls everyone lovely, mate, sweety, hen.
I think it depends on the person, the way it is said more than exactly what is verbalised.
I found being called hen by my little sister when she was 15 was odd but not from an older friend point of view, more she had adopted the speech pattern of her 15 year old friends and couldn't look at me as she said it. Usually now that she is saner (ish :P) I'm happy to be called hunni.
In bars very few people have had the balls to sweet talk me if the man is there but there are a few friends to whom I'll answer most forms of address. One guy calls everyone luv, chuck, chicken another lass calls everyone lovely, mate, sweety, hen.
I think it depends on the person, the way it is said more than exactly what is verbalised.
That's also very true! If it's said in a light hearted, cheery way it's very different to a letcherous drawl!
Lol I've had a few nicknames. Bambi ("because you've got big eyes and are a bit clumsy"), all the rest apply to me be small: titch, shorty, shrimp, Tink.
My OH calls me little one sometimes and I really love that because I feel all small and protected He also calls me Tits Mcgee which I also love!
