For starters a bit of communication may well be required if you havent broached your feelings, constructively done in a way that perhaps errs towards - hey wouldnt it be fun to' or how about we try'.....a good tip sometimes depending on the context can be to use a 3rd party to soften any potential blow....'i read', the girls were talking about'.....
the other is interest. Dosn't matter whether its sex or anything else in life, if you can't pique someones interest, and if they aren't interested in a subject then nothing will ever change.
use a little bit about 45 mins before sex but wash it off before sex and it should help him last a bit.
but, this will work much better after a good long chat about how you're feeling. if he really doesn't like giving you oral then suggest toys he can use. also, imagination is a powerful erotic tool, get his mind thinking. for example: suggest he gently tie you up and then let him choose which toys to use on you or a suggest a remote control egg and give him the remote and go for a drink, or even a little more extreme, suggest chastity play where you hold the key and only allow him to orgasm when you say he deserves it. ; )
lots of things you can do but a good chat with him is the first step.
I used to have the same problem, so I trawled the LH Forums for advice. (didn't want pills or numbing creams though). I found the simplest solution was breathing techniques. Slowing and regulating my breathing (slow, deep breaths) has helped increase my staying time considerably. Also making sure my delicious OH climaxes through foreplay helps a lot.
my boyfriend had this problem when we first got together, through practice he's managed to control it all together, he just stops for a few seconds when he can feel himself getting close. I think the fact that we had sex a lot helped too, it only lasted a few weeks