Simon78 wrote:
The last time we had sex, her taking turns between me and the toys like i described in my original post, at one point I wanted back in again and she almost screamed "Oh god no! not now!" She came a few minutes after that and it was clearly a pretty intense orgasm.
She (thankfully!) let me back in after she'd cum and we did talk about it then. She says my cock feels really small after the toys, especially the length, to the extent that sometimes it's hard to tell if I'm in or not. She told me she had said no at that point because she was close to cumming and didn't want that little thing (meaning my penis lol) back in her then. Before that I thought it was mainly girth that matters but I guess length does too.
Thoughts, anyone?
I guess it's different things for different people,but if those were her words then that's harsh!!!
Personally i don't like big and i don't really think size is important.To me it's about how attentive the person your with is.My partner isn't the 'biggest' of men and that suits me fine.While i will admit that i don't orgasm very often during penetration,i do orgasm EVERY time we have sex,mostly with clitoral stimulation.
We do use toys in the bedroom but we include them during sex for BOTH of our pleasure.And i would certainly not say that i prefer using these to havin g sex with him.When i do orgasm through penetration it depends on the position we are in.
To me sex should be for you both to enjoy not just one sided.
xx
katmiaow wrote:
that is a bit harsh
i can sort of understand why she might find something smaller much less pleasurable after having a big toy inside her- i think we tend to become a bit numbed to the more subtle sensations after rougher play if you see what i mean.
This - I have to give up trying to orgasm after penetrative sex because often the intensity of it makes it difficult to orgasm by other means.
Though your OH is definitely too harsh Simon! Really insensitive! Some people seem to think men have a limitless supply of confidence!
Adx
Hey...I'm a pretty confident guy when it comes to my size. I'm very average sized, and have never had any problem with it or any worries. I use toys on my wife quite a lot, and she cums from them, but always prefers to have me inside her and cums a lot faster from me. I think sex for most people is about giving pleasure as much as it is recieving, and that's what makes us ( particularly me and boobaloo ) cum. So until she'd said that to you I wouldn't have been worried. But..
After reading what she said, I 'm thinking she's being a little nasty and possibly selfish. Yeah I can understand her wanting to get to the orgasm that'd been building, and that a cock might not feel as big after a large toy. But ( and part of me wants to ask if she's got a hole like Watford Gap... ) you can't just use toys all the time, I don't think it's healthy towards a good sex life. Stretching is fine, but like on of the girls said, she can't let that be her focus or it could end up being the only way she can orgasm.
Btw, thanks girls for saying that to us guys, is a big help confidence-wise to us. Even those who already know!
She does like my cock as well but it's easy to see her orgasms are much more intense with the big toys. One thing she did say was that mine feels really short after the toys (5" compared with 8" is quite a difference i suppose). I always thought girth mattered more than length though. Can any other ladies who like them big, especially long, give me an idea why that feels better? If all the sensitive parts are near the front, how can longer feel so much better?
I don´t like it big and long (can be painful), but I am generally far more sensitive in the beginning of the vagina. I get more stimulation there, the back of the vagina is not that sensitive (at least mine is not).
Simon78, I do like using big toys and stuff - but when I stretch myself too much, afterwards the penis of my husband (and he is not small at all) doesn't feel quite right and wouldn't hit the right spots. However, if I use toys smaller than his - well, they fail to do it for me either. Why don't you talk to her and use big toys only for anal, for example, and then average size ones similar to your size (but not bigger) for the front? Also maybe she could try some kegel balls training, so that she could strengthen and tighten her muscles down there and feel much better with you? If she doesn't want to try that, I believe she would be quite intolerant.
An update lol.
We're both really enjoying this now, it seems to develop a little each time we have sex. Last time, this happened -
After some normal sex she pushed me out, reached for her really big toy (nearly twice the length of my cock and MUCH thicker), turned round so her pussy was close to my face, began fucking herself with it and told me to wank while i watch her. She was sliding it all the way in and out and seemed to enjoy making a show of it. She had 2 really intense orgasms like that and once she had enough told me to hurry up and cum so i finished myself off while she watched me.
It was all a heat of the moment thing but we talked about it after and she said she loved that she left me playing with my little one while she got filled deep and stretched by the big toy and she made a special effort to show me how big it was and how much she enjoyed it filling her deep and stretching her wide. I must say I found it incredibly hot too.
Anyone else enjoy this kind of play?
personally, i love using huge toys on my gf and she loves receiving them. but as people as said i dont think there's any substitute for the real thing - size wise or otherwise. we're talking about two different leagues.
yes she feel well stretched after having a huge toy in her but that doesnt make it all bad. the fact we can both play this way is what is more important.
also we like using my cock and a toy together sometimes too which is good fun.
I love my bam dildo and the stretch it gives me but much prefer my OH cock because i love to have him on top of me or in any other position because i get the horny heat and intensity only he can make me feel. Real cock and intimacy beats big dildos hands down besides bam cant cut the grass lol.
GTSH wrote:
I love my bam dildo and the stretch it gives me but much prefer my OH cock because i love to have him on top of me or in any other position because i get the horny heat and intensity only he can make me feel. Real cock and intimacy beats big dildos hands down besides bam cant cut the grass lol.
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glitter&gold wrote:
GTSH wrote:
I love my bam dildo and the stretch it gives me but much prefer my OH cock because i love to have him on top of me or in any other position because i get the horny heat and intensity only he can make me feel. Real cock and intimacy beats big dildos hands down besides bam cant cut the grass lol.
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Yes, totally agree. Toys are great, especially when I am on my own, but the intimacy I get when being with my partner is sooo much better. I really love the connection we share and that´s something not even the best toy gives me.
I concur.
SnL wrote:
I concur.
ditto .you kow we are needed no matter what size we are for body heat, gardening lighting fires and trips to the superstores and our small little credit cards
lickmadick wrote:
ditto .you kow we are needed no matter what size we are for body heat, gardening lighting fires and trips to the superstores and our small little credit cards
lol, yes this!
Now I love when something is hitting my cervix, which I know a lot of women dont like because they find it painful. This is easier to achieve with a longer penis or dildo/vibrator but there are also different positions you can try to get the same effect. I found with my ex who was smaller than average if we was concentrating on say, missionary position and then he would suddenly turn me over and ram me hard in doggy position with my head touching the floor he would hit my cervix because my body doesn't adjust THAT fast and if he really went to town on ramming it I would be screaming the place down lol. In that instance too much foreplay works against me. If I went from a toy to him I would prefer moving in to a position for cliteral stimulation and being 'loving' looking in to each others eyes and kissing etc which would give me a chance to calm down a bit and refocus on him rather than the toys. He was just as good just needed to adjust slightly. I dislike using toys to much as I do find they desensitize me and then I go on an amnesty for a while if I feel that happening. Depends how often you have sex as well. If its everyday or several times a day and you're using big toys every time I would have thought she wouldn't get chance to 'return to normal'
lilac_vix wrote:
Now I love when something is hitting my cervix, which I know a lot of women dont like because they find it painful. This is easier to achieve with a longer penis or dildo/vibrator but there are also different positions you can try to get the same effect. I found with my ex who was smaller than average if we was concentrating on say, missionary position and then he would suddenly turn me over and ram me hard in doggy position with my head touching the floor he would hit my cervix because my body doesn't adjust THAT fast and if he really went to town on ramming it I would be screaming the place down lol. In that instance too much foreplay works against me. If I went from a toy to him I would prefer moving in to a position for cliteral stimulation and being 'loving' looking in to each others eyes and kissing etc which would give me a chance to calm down a bit and refocus on him rather than the toys. He was just as good just needed to adjust slightly. I dislike using toys to much as I do find they desensitize me and then I go on an amnesty for a while if I feel that happening. Depends how often you have sex as well. If its everyday or several times a day and you're using big toys every time I would have thought she wouldn't get chance to 'return to normal'
Now I love it when I have sex with my OH and this happens as my orgasms are imense but this will happen only in certain positions that means he is very deep inside me. Intamasy however is a big part of sex for me when we make love but is different when we are having a "fun" session, then its purely about pleasure.
I think bith yourself and your OH get alot of pleasure out of her using big toys whist u watch or use them on her but if she does actually mention that your penis is small alot then this is why you are having issues. Confidence plays a huge part with any persons enjoyment of sex and I do think that you both need to go back to basics for a while and make love, just u and her.
Xxx