My partner keeps mentioning swinging or having a threesum/foursum with other couples.

Just wondered what everyone's views are on this? If anyone does it? How do you even instigate it?

We have done it. The only thing I would say is your relationship has to be 100% secure before you think about taking part, if it's not don't do it. Also, if you or your partner, are jealous don't do it as you will regret it forever.

if you are serious join FabSwingers and see what couples and clubs are in your area. Always meet socially first before moving into swinging to make sure there is an attraction and connection

feel free to ask any advice or questions, more than happy to help

Thanks J&K 2016 I'm not sure how I feel about it if I'm honest

Pudgie wrote:

Thanks J&K 2016 I'm not sure how I feel about it if I'm honest

If you are unsure then it's not for you. Don't just take our advice, let others give their opinion also

There's a recent thread on having sex in front of others here: https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/community/forums/sex-tips-and-talk/1626467-being-watched-having-sex-need-advice-plz/

As you can see, swinging clubs are very laid back. You can visit without any need to take part. As a first step, when (and if) you are ready, you could consider visiting a club, just to see what happens.

My only tip would be to trust your gut in this instance. If you really aren't into the idea, then that's absolutely your right to feel that way. If you're initially not sure but are curious, then I'd recommend doing a bit of research (as you are now).

Just remember that being proud/firm of what you don't like/want to try is just as important as being proud/firm with what you do like/want to try.

Also remember that even if you show some interest you always have the right to take a step back (or forwards) at any point. Just coz you show a little interest doesn't mean you're "all in" and consent is a fluid thing which can be given or taken away whenever you want (repeatedly if you wish). 

Oh and saying "yes" once doesn't mean "yes" forever. So if you are curious but are worried about what might happen if you change your mind after trying swinging or a threesome, just remember that you can always say "no" later and decide it's not something you want to do again. 

Good luck! 

We have tried it and enjoyed it but it's not something we will rush into doing again. But the option is always there if we decide to.

Make sure you're 100% secure with your relationship and that's for both people. If you think there's the slightest chance either you or your partner won't like someone else touching or having sex with you or your partner, don't do it.

And remember, even if you agree you can stop at any time. You're not forced to do it and if one person wants to stop, the other should agree and stop too.

Hopefully you make the right choice as to whether to try it or not and if you do I hope you have fun

Hi everyone

Thank you for your replies I am seriously thinking about going to a swinging club with my partner I know it's a silly question but what actually happens I have it in my head it will be full of sleazy people etc but I bet it's not

We are both intrigued.....but maybe at fantasy level. Although I'm very sure I'd enjoy it and it would let her explore her Bisexuality. But not sure we'd ever go.

I think it's great. Many people go to just watch initially because it can be overwhelming to start with, particularly for men who have to work harder at initiating contact and then also to perform to a high standard.

Very liberating experience and a huge confidence boost for ladies - provided you're open minded enough to relax and enjoy it.

we used to swing, we enjoyed it for a while, and have made some great friends that we are still intouch with now, we stopped because, clubs wer not our thing and meeting online was mad trying to sort out the idiots from the real people, alot of couples do it because only one of them really wants to, these are not fun people to play with, make 100% sure your both wanting to do it, then enjoy, but if not 100% find another fetish, like role play

you must both be into it 110 per cent and talk about what you are willing to do with the people you meet and make rules and respect everybodys limits

we do meet o bi males only

be prepared to have a lot of non meets if you are using contact sites,we do

but when we find right people to peform with we enjoy the extra fun

Will definitely give it a try at Cupids Swingers club in my next visit to UK. Very good reviews. Like the facts that the swingers abides by the rules strictly.

You have to be 100% sure in your relationship and discuss it before you embark. We have done it a number of times mainly with friends where we knew we all had an interest in the other people involved. We have always enjoyed it and have often repeated it with the same couples.

We joined a club to have a look joined a site and we always talk about
our desires to keep it great for both of us

Mrs D and I have discussed her enjoying a second cock whilst I'm
enjoying her, she is very keen on the idea, but not sure if she;d
actually be able to 'perform' in real life...I suggested we go to a
swingers' club with no expectations and see what happens..I have no
desires to see her having penetrative sex with another man, but would
love to watch her busy at one end whilst I'm busy at the other