Threesomes/Foursomes/Being Watched - How we did it....

Sex Tips & Talk
1

Hi

If anyone has ever thought about either a threesome, foursome or being watched, then here are details of our experience and we hope that it might help in anyone's quest. This is not guide on how to...just how WE did it. Hope it helps.

A few months ago my OH and I decided we that we would love to be watched having sex. We started a thread on LH asking for advce and someone suggested putting an ad on an Adult website. We looked at quite a few and decided on Swinging Heaven. Let us just say, we are not swingers, just a normal couple looking for something a bit different.

We placed an ad asking for likeminded couples who like to be watched too. We were very cautious and made it very clear what we wanted and we didn't want and never gave out face pics until we chatted for a while. We also said that we would never meet anyone on our doorstep. After about 3 months we found a couple of nice 'normal' couples who were seeking similar. After emailing, swopping face pics and chatting on the phone we eventually met up for a coffee half between each other (approx 20 miles) and we all clicked.

The next meet was what we call 'same room fun', where we would watch each other in respective couples, or all have sex at the same time (again in own couples) on the bed. It was a very sexy night and felot very natural. The second time we found a couple with a bisexual female and i had always been fascinated and curious about the whole FF thing, but we never felt any pressure from the couple to engage in it, just that it was an option, however, on the night we didn't leave the bed for about 5 hours and i had my first FF experience, WOW! We always said we would never swop and we still don't, but we are now happy for the two girlies to interact, with the guys joining in with their respective partners. It feels so natural now and we don't feel any desire to evolve into full or soft swinging, just same room fun with FF interaction.

It has taken us a while to find exactly what we were after and we hope that our jouney to finding a threesome/foursome/being watched may help others find similar.

Top tips:

Know what you want and stick to it, no hidden agenda with your partner. If you want to turn fantasy to reality have a good long chat about it and if all parties concerned are happy, go for it!

Take your time finding the right couple/person, they are out there, but don't rush in, we took 3 months of emailing/chatting/deleting requests before finding just two couples we liked. Be picky.

When you do find a likeminded couple, get to know them via email, skype, mobile etc first, then meet for a coffee and if they are not right, don't feel bad saying no to them, and likewise they may say you aren't what they are looking for.

Finally, always be honest with what you're after with your OH, because when you do finally meet another couple, its an amazing experience when your all in sync.

We did have a few ups and downs, but we knew what we wanted and now meet the same couple regularly for a (sort of) threesome/foursome, depending who is on the bed and have become close friends.

If anyone would like to ask any other questions then please feel free to ask. If it's a geuine fantasy of yours, then al we can say is that it is very achievable, it just takes time, patience and open mindedness.

Hope this helps.

Two very happy people x

2

Hi

Thanks for the post, its really good to get some real honest advice and tips about this. You always worry when trying to find people for things like this online your just going to get a bunch of weirdos!

Sounds like your having fun and making the most of it.

x

3

In fact almost all the people we met for coffee said 'you're too nice for this' or something similar, as we are not swingers or weirdos, just a couple wanting to add another dimension to an already great sex life. We are very happy.

4

I suppose there are probably alot of people like you out there looking for other nice people to meet up with and do this sort of thing, its just hard to know where to start.

5

We noticed quite a few recurring threads about threesomes etc and if anyone didn't know where to start, then please use our tips, as this has been about 4 months in total of adverts/emails/meeting up etc and we learnt quite a lot and felt we must share this with others who don't know where to start. We would love to hear if anyone starts this journey, as its exciting and a lot fun.

6

So where did u advertise? Maybe you could tell me on chat or email?

7

We put an ad on a swingers website, but its not purely for swingers, it has hundreds of people just looking for same room fun, no partner swopping, you just need to make it very clear what you want. We used swinging heaven. There is a charge, but most do have a fee and we liked their format. There probably are others, but it worked for us. Have a look at a few and decide what you want, upload a profile, maybe some pics (we never used face pics, just body ones) and that's it. We browsed for other couples and knew the age group, distance etc and set all the search parameters based on what we wanted, I.e non smokers, between 25-40, between 20-50miles away,etc. Hope this helps.

8

Some friends of ours that tool our advice ref meeting couples are meeting their first couple tonight. They are so excited.

9

Thats fab glad you found what you were looking for x

10

Love all your common sense advice

11

As long as people are honest in their couples and are willing to research and be patient, then they will be rewarded with their fantasies coming true. We are glad to help.

12

Thanks for sharing your experiences, you're very brave to have people in your house (or go to theirs) right at the start of your group-sex experiences. We were the opposite, wanted to try the same things as you but in a 'neutral' location that we could leave easily if we didn't like the way things were going.

We decided to give a swinger club a try, so investigated and decided on La Chambre in Sheffield which had a good reputation and was about an hour from our place. We thought it might be a bit sordid, but it wasn't like that at all. On arrival we were shown around by one of the staff and during that visit went into the pool a couple of busy playrooms and made love together. We were conscious there was swapping and other interactions going on all around, but we concentrated on one another and were just happy to be there amongst others. It was something we hadn't done before as a couple, or indeed for many, many years; both of us had done some group-sex before our first marriages, so it wasn't totally strange.

We discussed it a lot afterwards and ended up by going to La Chambre or Chameleons every month. Two months later we had our first soft-swing swap as a couple and these became regular occurrences until one evening we both felt ready to go further and did our first full (or hard-swinging) swap. A year or so after we invited one of the couples we'd met to come to our house and had our first home group-sex session, which went really well. Then we joined an on-line swinger group, met some other lovely people and home 4somes became our main swinging activity. We still go clubbing occasionally as we love being in large groups.

If sex among other people is one of your fantasies then we'd urge you to try it, and can recommend visiting a decent swinging club; we found it very liberating rather than being wrong, or even unusual. Everybody is nude and willingly playing in a happy, rather than an exploitive, way, and part of the fun is watching and being watched. The people involved have very normal bodies rather than models' bodies, and the sex is playful rather than the sort of marathon stuff you see in porn. You don't have to participate, there is no pressure at all.

We've read that our distant ancestors enjoyed group-sex, it's nice to think we're able to enjoy that these days but with safeguards against pregnancy and disease. As Desmond Morris, who wrote "The Naked Ape" said, sex is the only way humans can really let go and play together; we agree!

13

Hi
Swinging, whether hard or soft isn't our thing at all. We like our intimate 2 couple get togethers and have no interest in clubs, as we are always worried about seeing someone we know, even out of town.

We only met at our house after many emails, chats and meet ups for coffee and only then did we agree to meet at ours and we must have made a good call as we still see them.

I always used to say that the best way I could describe sleeping with another person (opposite sex), or full swinging, would be like Harry Potter and the horcruxes. You sleep with them a little part of your soul is chipped off and you will never get that back, they now own it. This means your partner never wholly belongs to you.

We only do same room and yes the two girlies play ,but its not true penetration sex.

Good luck though, you sound very happy.

14

We've been to a club twice but didn't really enjoy the experiences.

It wasn't one of the big clubs but we found that it was very clicky (sp) and it's put us off going elsewhere.

It's very difficult for us to attend any club given that we are in the CI so it involves, planes/boat & travel and more importantly expense!

We've met couples over here but there aren't that many of them but of course, an abundance of single guys (well, until you try and pin one down and they get cold feet!)

We were in the UK this past weekend meeting a lovely lady for hubby's first FFM - an enjoyable experience for him I didn't really get involved, just sat back and took pics and watched - which is a surprise to me as I am quite a jealous person (surprisingly given what we do) but as I said to hubby, it's more jealousy because he is giving the woman (if in a couple situation) a good time, but the hubby has usually been crap!

Anyway, after reading the replies on here the only thing that I would confirm is communication between the pair of you and agreed boundaries then all there is left to do is................enjoy

15

would love to fuck a young girl in front of a mature woman and then do the mature woman show her what she's going to get !

16

I'm not sure if I'm into this but I have to say that's great advice, thanks for the contribution :)

17

It's not everyone's cup of tea and until this summer I never expected it would be mine, but the cliche is true, you're only young once and we didn't want to be old and wrinkly regretting not turning a fantasy into a reality. It was a great decision and we are loving it.

18

Ms Astral has been asking me to ask about lately, but there's only really one of our friends who might have been into it. She didn't take offence but she did decline. The problem is not being comfortable sexing with strangers or people we've met up with solely for that purpose. We've talked about it quite a bit but thinking through all the practicalities of a threesome/foursome, it's probably not going to happen. In principal, the idea is a massive turn on for both of us, but involving other people is where it starts to fall apart - which is kind of the whole point!

Hadn't thought about watching/being watched, though. That might be easier. Will have a talk about that with Ms Astral when she gets in later. Personally, my interest has been piqued...

19

Sometimes though Astral it's the thought or ideas that can get you going not the actual act itself.

When we are looking to hook up we get really horny and then afterwards we are very loving and affectionate to each other (more than usual)

There is nothing wrong with the fantasy and if you don't feel comfortable in actually doing it that's fine just don't join a site like fabswingers and start looking at people or chatting to them as that's what riles people and called a timewaster (not that I am saying you would do that) unless you are actually going to go through with a meet (in whatever context you want it to be)

20

No, no, absolutely. Like I say we're not the types to jump in head first, make promises, then bail out and leave people high and dry. Lots of talking things through before a decision's made. It's why I'm perfectly fine to admit that "it's probably not going to happen" (from my last post).

Also, you're right, fantasies can be fun by their own merit! There are some other things we talk about that we'd never do in reality but the fantasy really gets us going!