If you look at her previous posts in other topics you will see that she has a different kind of sexual life style and she mentioned this has happened before but not necessarily with the same person. Also her husbands penis is small which would make it easier for her. Thing is if she lets it worry her too much then vaginismus could become an issue although it is more common in younger women late teens to early thirties it can develope if she becomes anxious each time she tries to have sex with anyone bigger than her husband.
The menopause is weird as you dont get all the symptoms at once they are gradual and creep up on you. You can get really wet but sex is painful, periods carry on as normal then you can go a couple of months with nothing and they return as normal. This can go on for years night sweats and mood swings come later. Then you dry up completely, which is a pain so you have to use lube, but i have come through it and i am now back to normal.
No. Whilst what you are suggesting is possible, it isnāt vaginismus. Vaginismus doesnāt come and go and itās not a one off thing. Being anxious about sex and contracting the vaginal muscles is absolutely a thing, but that in itself is not vaginismus.
Well, I have an answer, and Iām not pre or peri menopausal! Freaking out a bit I was able to slip into a cancellation with my gyno.
When taking a look she noted what I already knew which is a random varicose vein or two. Itās more pronounced around the sides of my vagina toward the top. She asked me if I any pain or notable feelings around the area and I told her a lot of the time it feel tight in the area, almost like I did an intense workout. She worked her way down to my asshole and I told her I donāt get it as much down there.
Her explanation was that I was having my pelvic floor muscle, or at least part of it, lock up after a spasm. She said spasms are usually noticeable but some arenāt so much to draw your complete attention and that sometimes they get locked in place. I def felt different so it makes sense to me. She seems to think thereās a possible association between the veins and where itās happening which is the reason I felt tighter up top but was able to go anal with him. I think it became some mental but that that really started as a result of legit physical issue. Iāve known Dex for almost 15 years and weāve had sex a couple hundred times at least so turns out itās physical with a twist of mental for exacerbation.
Iām so glad you got an answer and your mind can be at rest, at least somewhat!
Did she have any options for treatment? Or is it something you need to work through mentally?
Proud of you for going and getting checked out, itās not the easiest thing, especially if you know something is going on 
So interestingly enough weāre in the middle of a major heatwave. I CrossFit which is very hot and Iāve had spasms and cramps on occasion in my muscles including a never ending twitch in my shoulder which I think is hydration related. I told her that and she said itās entirely possible I had a twitch in the pelvic floor but it stayed locked in place. She recommended hydrating better but agreed I made it even more tense as a result of the frustration and nerves of not being able to get him in.
Glad you now know what has caused it. I do know of a woman who developed like varicose veins down there due to child birth. She had an operation to remove them. Did they offer any treatment to you or is it a see how you go thing?
Iāve looked into the treatments before and they seem to be a bit of a pain more than what Iām wanting to do at least for now.
I understand not something you want to do until you have to.