@Likeable sounds familiar. Remember getting to the hotel exhausted. Had a quiet moment with the now Mrs enjoying some champagne addressing each other as Mrā¦. and Mrsā¦. Asked her if I could consumate our marriage ( had been living together for a couple of years ) and we proceeded to de construct her outfit enjoying each otherās body but without too much intensity - it was as you say tick that one ! The honeymoon sex was another level, including balcony sex, skinny dipping and sex in the resort pool. Great memories but if anything sex today is even better with a little bit of help from LH !
Our wedding Night was short with No action, Arrived at our Honeymoon Hotel at 12.30 am, had to be up at 04.30 to get to Gatwick for 06.00.
We wore both Matching Lingerie on the wedding day, French Knickers, Cami, Suspenders and White Lace top Stockings, She also wore a Basque (i wanted to But It showed up to much !).
Our Honeymoon In Italy was Fun, First Night I Dressed in a light rose coloured Boned 8 strap Corset, Pulled really tight.
White stockings, Rose Chiffon Knickers and Pink High Heels, My Wife had on a short white Babydoll nightdress, white satin thong, white lace top hold ups, This night set the Theme for most of the week.
anniversaries are always as Much Fun !!
The wedding day was one long party so come the wedding night we were exhausted and crashed out. But the honeymoon ..
āLetās chat about Wedding Nights/Honeymoons!ā
Oh boy (or girl to keep it fair).
We didnāt have sex on our wedding night.
Context is needed as thatās a cut and dry statement above.
We were married in July of 1989 (my 1st wife).
Why did it matter that we didnāt have sex on our wedding night?
Here is why it mattered to me. My then fiancee, we lived together, came to me a bit more than 6 months out from our wedding and she informed me that we werenāt going to have sex for the 6 months leading up to our wedding.
In her words, she wanted it to be āmore specialā on our wedding night since weād been having sex before we were married.
I was informed, it wasnāt a discussion. So we didnāt have sex, of any kind, for the 6 months leading up to our wedding.
We were healthy, younger, in love and we hadnāt had sex for 6 months so in my mind there was no way we wouldnāt have sex on our wedding night.
More context for you. Our wedding went off without a hitch. Great weather, everyone showed up, nothing fell over and went boom during the ceremony. The wedding reception was a blast and went well too.
I say this just so you know that there wasnāt anything that ruined her perfect day.
Now, I did NOT know this back then, on our wedding night, on our honeymoon or at any point during our marriage either.
But Iāve known it since the fall of 2005 and it affects my thoughts, feelings and opinions about my wedding night and honeymoon, not to mention my marriage.
What I didnāt know back then was that my then fiancee had been and was cheating on me. She stopped us from having sex as she was having sex with her paramour.
Our honeymoon was 10 days and we had sex once and that was it. I tried to initiate a few other times, was told no and I quit trying after that, for the rest of our honeymoon I mean.
Thankfully, wedding and honeymoon #2 were much better.
It wasnāt anything crazy. We stayed in a nice hotel near the airport as we flew out to the Bahamas the next day. We had sex in our hotel room and we had sex many times on our honeymoon in the Bahamas (the Northern Abacos, think Marsh Harbour, Great Guana Cay, Elbow Cay etc.).
Lots of spanking! LOTS! Didnāt have any toys. We were each oithers toy..well my bottom was her toyā¦
Wow. Hope you donāt mind me saying that your first wife was an absolute cow. I find Iām getting more and more angry at things like this. Some people just ..
Thank you. I appreciate that.
Think Iāve said she and I had many issues. I wasnāt blameless either of course.
She had the quote/unquote nice childhood, both parents together until they died, two older siblings, no real issues in her childhood, which is good of course.
I and my younger sister had a terrible childhood, our mom divorced when I was 2 and my younger sister wasnāt even yet 1. We, my sister and I, went through a lot of abuse yet somehow my ex-wife had many control issues, she was highly insecure with her body image due to an older anorexic sister and thin was in back in the 70ās when she was yaung and growing up.
Our issues went far beyond the bedroom is my point. Yes, we had plenty of issues there too, but we did outside of the bedroom as well.
I didnāt have the skills or the knowledge to appropriately deal with things and issues with my 1st wife due to my childhood. As Iāve said, I walked on eggshells around my 1st wife, tried to please her, tried to keep her from blowing up at me etc.
I was wrong to do that of course but I didnāt know what I didnāt know back then either.
There were issues with my family too as my 1st wife didnāt like my mother (canāt say as I blamed her for that though as my mother was a piece of work as the saying goes). But that caused a lot of issues for us.
My MIL was darn near a saint but my FIL was a piece of work too and yet my wife overlooked that in her father but not in my mother.
I could literally write a book (I have basically as therapists after divorcing her said I might want to try journaling and I did and Iāve kept doing it and I have a word document with 1,147 pages currently and it slowly grows as time goes on.
In lieu of a zillion examples, Iāll list a few of the worst ones. My mom always had cats, I always wanted a dog growing up but never had one. Shortly after getting married, my 1st wife and I got a dog, my first ever dog. She had dogs growing up and she loved them too.
13 years later our dog was old and needed to be down for her sake. I/we knew the time was coming. My 1st wife stayed at home after we began having children.
I got up, went to work and guess what my 1st wife did that day? Easy for you and others to guess. Yes, she had our dog put down that day.
I had NO idea my wife was going to have that done that day. She hadnāt told me. I left to go to the office and I fully expected to see my dog when I got home that evening.
Here is how I found out. My 1st wife called me at work in the afternoon, around 2 p.m. or so. She said she wasnāt able to take the dog out of the back of her van (she was a small dog, a beagle, not big or heavy so it wasnāt that). My wife was āsadā and didnāt have it in her to take the dog out of the back of her van. The vet wrapped her in a sheet and placed her in the back of the minivan.
My wife called me in the office to tell me I had to come home to dig a hole and bury her and carry her from the van since she wasnāt able to do it.
So I left the office, dug a hole in the backyard, placed our dog in the hole and then our 3 kids, my wife and I had a quick funeral and they went inside while I finished burying her. I placed a bush over the top of her.
If my 1st wife wanted to do something, she did it. She didnāt afford me the same leeway.
I was controlled financially too as she controlled our money even though she didnāt work for more than half of our marriage.
Again, I could or should have stopped her but I loved her, trusted her etc. and I was a mess from my childhood.
Enough, you get it. Twas a mess all the way around with her, the two of us etc.
Thanks again.
I really donāt know what to say to that. Iām just glad you eventually got out and found happiness second time round. I like your attitude. Its very easy for us to look back and criticise ourselves for our mistakes. But weāre not born with a cornucopia of knowledge and experience. Weāre all growing and learning andd making it up as we go along.
Your journal made me smile. I did the same. No were near 1147 pages but Iām proud of it. Started as a back of an envelope list of things I hate about myself, for my first therapy session. It never left my pocket but I eventually typed up and expanded it
You donāt need to say anything to that. Youāve showed you cared and that means a lot. Nothing you or others may say changes any of it and keep in mind itās been a long time since this is all happened. My divorce from her has been finalized over 20 years ago now.
I went to a lot of therapy, in different states as I moved around. It took several years as it wasnāt a quick fix for me.
Now, it didnāt take my therapists long to recognize my issues predated my ex-wife, before I ever met her. My issues began early on in my childhood due to my situation (my sister too sadly).
I say this because there was a lot to unpack beyond my relationship with my ex-wife.
I honestly said the following to my first therapist. I said to him, I want to know how and why my life has ended up like it has. I wanted to learn from it.
I had no idea how involved things were, how interconnected things all were, from my childhood right onto when I met my future wife when we began dating in high school etc.
I wonāt go into this now, itās not the time or the question but Iāve stated elsewhere that the first three years after my divorce were a whirlwind. I had a lot of āfunā is how Iāll put it. I did NOT set out for that to happen. But I was a mess from the divorce, from catching my wife cheating, then finding out she began cheating on me while we were engaged. I was missing the kids already knowing the divorce was coming etc.
I was in therapy and now I had a lot more free time after I was divorced. I LIKED being married, I coached little league, youth soccer and I was highly involved in our childrenās lives. We did many things, I was a family man and I loved it.
I was sad and depressed after the divorce although I didnāt realize it. My therapist told me I was.
Friends began taking me out, things snowballed and itās the opposite of who and what I was, how I lived as a married man etc.
I wasnāt able to see it then, but those first 3 years after my divorce stemmed from my bad childhood and my bad relationship and marriage with my 1st wife.
I wasnāt in a good head space as they say during and after my divorce and that led to other things happening while I had my so-called āfunā.
It took me until my early 40ās to finally level off, to have learned and understood all that Iād been through etc.
Iām not perfect yet and Iāll never be of course. Iām not trying to be perfect anymore though. I tried to be perfect for my ex-wife.
The examples and incidents are darn near endless after decades and decades. All along I wasnāt able to see how they were all interconnected.
I wonāt go into the details but there is a post or a question nudity on the forum, about how itās nice, good and freeing and some wish others felt OK about themselves enough to be able to go to a nude beach. I agree, I wish everyone felt comfortable enough in their own skin and with themselves to do that.
With all I went through in my childhood and as an adult, there is no way I would ever go to a nude beach and itās all interconnected to things that began early on in my childhood and continued from there.
Again thanks for what you have said. Nothing needs to be said, please donāt feel the need to reply this.
Take care.
What a beautiful legend the wedding night is! What a beautiful legend the wedding night is! For us, it was impossible to imagine doing anything at all, we were so exhausted.
But donāt panic, we obviously made up for it on our honeymoon! This provided opportunities for various firsts (anulingus, anal sex, using a connected sex toy in publicā¦).
What wonderful memories!
Married twice, both wedding nights were disasters.
My first wife and I were both virgins ( her choice) we had a nice ceremony in church, and a reception that evening. We danced and drank a little and had fun at the reception, then took off to go to a little inn for our wedding night. She looked ravishing in her dress, and I was extremely excited to be able to be with her in a way I had dreamed of for a long time. She was hungry, having not eaten all day because of nerves, so I went out and got her favorite sandwich from a shop we frequented. We ate a bit, and sat about the room talking, trying to wrap our heads around our new life together. We didnāt move in together prior to the wedding, again her choice.
Then she got sick. The stress, and sandwich did her in. She spent some time in the toilet throwing up and soon we just collapsed in our bed. We went on a short honeymoon but never did consummate the event, indeed, not for 9 years after.
My second marriage started out with a simple ceremony with close friends, and a dinner afterwards, a total of about 30 people. We finished the dinner and said goodbye to the group, and headed off on our honeymoon, a 4 hour drive away. We had been living in separate homes, but spending a lot of time together. So we had been having sex during that time. We got hungry along the drive and stopped at a restaurant we loved and had a nice meal. Then headed off to our inn in a quaint little harbor town. But, we didnāt make it out of the parking lot before she was bent over throwing up in a drainage ditch. She could not stop wrenching, and I got concerned, and got us to a nearby emergency room. They admitted her to a room, though discharged her a few hours later. We spent the night at a hotel just a short distance from the hospital, just in case of more issues. We finally did make it to our inn, a day late, and wound up downing 90% of a large bottle of bubbly, while soaking in the hot tub,and passing out. The next day, groggy and hung over, we did the deed, which was great despite feeling a bit off.
So both wedding nights ended up with sick wives, and no sex. I wonder if there is a theme there?
We got home shattered, but we both wanted to make sure we consummated the marriage. She rode me with her stockings and suspenders on. She was bloody magnificent ![]()
It wasnāt a long session, 20 odd minutes and we both crashed out ![]()
Took so long to get the dress removed, hair clips etc off felt like a session just doing that lol. Mind you a blue tablet as knew it would be a long day did the trick. We booked the honeymoon suite for an extra night and that felt more like how a wedding night should have been! More energy the next day so had to utilise all the room, sofa, balcony
Sounds greatā¦love that the balcony was used ![]()
![]()
![]()
We always use balcony on every holiday! The thrill of it such a turn on, but this was really good. Hearing people in the gardens etc.
Did during the day but on the furniture so couldnt be seen but could hear everyone, then in dark stood up so could look out of balcony
We got married last Saturday. On the day we were actually too tired (and drunk), but weāve been like rabbits since. Sheās been so turned on, even some of the bigger toys weāve got have been used. Including a girthy penis sleeve that she said was too big for her before.
Congratulations!
Yeah we were too tired on the actual wedding night. I suspect most people are the same. Its a long, long, tiring day.