Just a bit of background so you can see the point of this topic. Basically I have been with my current partner for the last 25 years and although I have a very high sex drive my partners takes a while to get going. A touch, a kiss or even just brushing past each other is enough to get me stood to attention. My partner however does not get these urges and although she says she loves all kinds of sex and foreplay she has never initiated any kind of sex or foreplay while we have been together.
When we do have sex it is great. We used to do a lot of oral but that has almost stopped. We used to do anal again this has stopped. Even the toy department has ceased to be opened. My partner says she likes all of it but never wants anything different to PIV now and that is getting longer and longer between.
I know this may just sound like another bloke looking for more sex and to some extent it is but even though we are now in our 50’s I find my partner sexy as hell hence the standing to attention at any interaction.
My question is what does your partner do to get you in the mood even if you are not feeling like it? Just looking for a few more ideas to show her how sexy I find her and to appreciate her own body more and hopefully invite me to join in the exploration.
This is obviously not everyone’s cup of tea but my OH knows that if she is feeling horny / kinky all she has to do is light up one of her thin cigar and that’s me paying attention
My husband has on occasions done a strip for me right down to his thong. Then gently lap dances me. It’s both hilarious and quite sexy.
He has also run me a bath and given me a lovely massage after a tough day. That resulted in great sensual action.
Last weekend we had a birthday party invitation and he suggested that I go commando. I thought why not although it was quite chilly. I have to tell you he was exceptionally attentive at the party and we went at it like rabbits when we got home. Didn’t even make the bedroom.
I know everyone’s situation is different, but for us sex has always been good and frequent. That said, once we became empty nesters and the kids moved out, my wife’s sex drive seemed to explode. But also, what gets my wife going is me just being nice, considerate. Letting her know I love her, holding her hand, hugs without sex being why or the reason.
Hi @TinyTom Have you tried to communicate your thoughts with her. The best way to get me in the mood is honesty , communication and understanding. If he listens and then helps take some of the stress and strain of what ever is going on at the time. It put me in better stead for the usual little thing to get through and get me going.
(Mrs)
Please do not get me wrong we do communicate and have a great relationship. Just after 25 years together I was hoping to find a few things to surprise her with and hopefully get the juices flowing a bit more again
Yes menopause is a concern but its more to find a few new ideas to try and spice things up and surprise her. After 25 years I have run out of my own and hoping for some inspiration
That is fantastic to hear and I hope things keep getting better and better. I had not thought of counselling as I do not believe my partner would openly discus intimate things to someone. I will bring up the subject and see what the response is.
Maybe consider doing a fun sexy card game or as Easter is around the corner why not have an egg hunt but instead she gotta solve clues to find some kinky things what later on she can enjoy with you in the bedroom
