Hi everyone!
I've wanted to try anal with my OH for a while now, but he's not really into it (he's not tried it) but we've talked about it and he said he's willing to give it a go.
He has a pretty big, thick cock and I'm a little nervous about tears ect. We have been looking at anal lube but not sure which is best, reccomendations?
Should I start with smaller toys and work my way up to him?
Thanks! xox
Iv been having a similar problem except im the one who's got issues.(with mess) but I have started with the smallest size plug. Everyone so far has told me to relax and take it slow which I didn't do. The lube me and my partner used is pjur backdoor anal glide. Its silicone based so not advised to be used on silicone toys and it kinda sticks around if you know what I mean, hard to get rid of. But dispite that I was happy with it considering I wasn't ready for anal it helped.
Also you might want to get a set of different size butt plugs. Using just the smallest might not be enough. I learned the hard way. No tearing but it just wasn't enough
Thanks stina,
I'll have a look at that lube, and maybe some others. I'll definitely invest in some butt plugs in the next couple weeks.
xox
Yeah, you'll def want to work your way up to him. Fingers, toys, whichever one suits you better. It takes quite a long time to work up to being able to take a larger cock, so patience patience patience!
The Lovehoney own anal lube and Sliquid sassy are both quite well reputed lubes. Both are water based and have no chemical nasties so you can have worry free play!
Don't forget a douche, always nice to be clean before hand.
He uses his fingers sometimes, but I don't feel like it'll be enough so I can handle him at some point. I'll be buying some anal toys soon.
I prefer water based lubes, so those two suggestions I'll definitely look into!
Does it matter which douche I use?
I second the douche and also the use of a graduating set of plugs before trying to take anything substantial. I use Lovehoney Discover lube and my OH prefers the FSoG At Ease lube. Both are waterbased so can be used safely with silicone plugs.
The only advice I can give is to take it slowly and try your best to relax. If you tense, your anal sphincter will tense and either won't allow anything to pass at all (yes I did think of Gandalf then :p) or will greatly complain if you manage to force something in.
I've been into anal play for a long time but sometimes I still find things hurt until after a few thrusts if using larger toys or during anal sex, as my OH is well endowed too. Another thing I find is that if I'm not completely raring to go, initial penetration will be a little uncomfortable but if I'm begging him to get inside of me there's no discomfort at all, so maybe leave insertion of any toys/his cock until you can't wait any more.
Emiie10 wrote:
Does it matter which douche I use?
I wouldn't imagine so. I just use the Lovehoney basics douche. It does the job, just remember to lube the tip or it gets a bit stingy :)
OUCH! Thank you ;) wrote:
Emiie10 wrote:
Does it matter which douche I use?
I wouldn't imagine so. I just use the Lovehoney basics douche. It does the job, just remember to lube the tip or it gets a bit stingy :)
I second that
Never even thought of the douche! lol
Anyway Just wanted to pitch in and say that we used pjur backdoor anal glider one too at first and it really was great! I recommend it =] we don't use any now, and i haven't experienced any tears even though we do it rough etc. But of course everyone is different you ahve to find what works for you and your own body =]
xxx
Thank you :)
Since he's been using his fingers he seems to want to use his cock even more quicker aha! But he knows he'll hurt me if I'm not ready, so I do intend to go slow and work up to him.
I've just purchased the LH douche!
I prefer rough too, but I think we'll take this one slow at first ;)
As above - building up to it is a must. Relaxation is also a must.
I always timed anal sex to fit in with my bowel movements so there was never any mess at all. Always wait until a couple of hours after you have visited the bathroom to start play and you should be fine, this applies to douching too. If you go ahead and start anal play right after douching you are putting yourself at risk as the douching will dry you up more inside. Leave it for an hour or two and use plenty of lube :)
I personally find that a nice romantic evening followed by an intimate massage will get me nice and relaxed.
Butt plugs are a great way to ease in to anal sex. Start with a finger and lots of lube and work up to a butt plug. This can then remain in during foreplay to help you to get used to the sensation and stretching, you should then be good to move on to anal intercourse. Relaxation and lube is key.
I also want to mention that any noise, mess etc. is OK. Before I started getting in to anal play I was always so worried that any of these things might happen and that I would be mortified - I was never told that it is normal and isn't a huge deal at all. So just putting that out there, don't worry about it :)
Good luck to you and have fun :)
All good advice - the only thing I would add is regarding the douching...
Just literally insert the tip into yourself, not the whole tube.
Also douche well in advance - probably a few hours or so, to allow everyhting there to settle down, and try avoid eating having douched. So dont douche too early and go hungry!
I'd recommend a water based lube. We used so many different types and then one day tried the water lube and it was amazing. Did it's job and was easily removed/wiped off.
I recommend maybe a plug first, however we slowly slowly worked more of my cock in every time. The only advice I can give you is Relax!!! As soon as your get nervous or tense things become 1000 times more difficult
Thanks for the advice everyone :)
I've read up on doucheing, so I have some idea of what to do and what not to.
I always talk about anal play with my oh, and he always lets me decide when we do (at least until I'm more comfortable) since I'm normally the submissive one.
i'd recommend building up with some smaller toys, and as some have said, douche before hand or it could be dangerous!