My partner has recently mentioned that he would like to try some anal action (on him) thinking of slipping a finger in the next time he is getting a BJ, can anyone give me any tips?
We have had plenty anal on me but I have never returned the favour before!
Please help me get this right, I really want to make this pleasurable for him & not put him off!
Very much the same rules - slowly and carefully. Work your way up from small to big. Imagine he's lying on his back, then the pleasure spot (prostrate) is located by putting a finger in and hooking it back towards you (upwards).
Something like this should help: https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=35053
First time I received a bj with anal (a small vibrator) - I lasted about 90 seconds and then couldn't walk (I'd been tied up too). Good luck!
It's a pretty good place to start just going with a finger. Slow, careful, use lube, make sure there's nothing in there before you try... Buying a toy is probably not a wise investment if after one or two fingers he already feels uncomfortable. Best to try leaving it to your own devices before using toys.
I fully agree a toy is not the way to go, I think a finger until he gets used to it is definitely the best way to start.
HE mentioned it so I would say he's likely to be quite receptive, have you tried rimming him when giving a BJ? lube and a finger or two, watch his face as you do it, if he likes it you'll probably be able to progress quite far, like if he's using a dildo on you, try saying " would/bet you would like me to use that on you?"
You don't have to slip a finger inside, just rubbing round and over his hole feels really good, any normal lube is fine to start with or whatever you use when you have anal, he won't regret saying "can we try" which is a guys way of saying, I want, especially if like me he's a bit shy.
And if he mentioned it, odds are that it won't be virgin territory, he may have dabbled with a bit of self stimulation of some description alread to try it out.
Definitely if he has already mentioned it the possibility is that he has tried it out on his own either that it's just a big fantasy of his.
just make sure you use a decent lube that lasts for ages and slowly insert your finger as you are going down in his shaft with your mouth, don't just bang it up there take smooth strokes as you go pushing a little deeper each time and bend your finger back towards you on your pulling out stroke. You can also try rotating the flat part of your finger as you've bent it in towards you and go in a circular motion and do that going slowly up and down.
The more used to it he gets the bigger and longer the finger or fingers you can use and then maybe go on to toys, anything from an anal probe to a prostate massager and even anal beads if they are of a decent size.
Just definitely make sure you use lube and hope and pray it's all clean before you try
I find long flexible toys best for beginner, hit the prostate so he enjoys it
Get the right lube, use almost too much. Go slowly, watch your fingernails are not too sharp. Point your finger at his prostrate and slowly milk it. When done right there is no better male orgasm in my opinion. After years we have only just started moving into the world of pegging as it embaresses my wife - the harness side. So at the moment we are at stage 1 - using the dildo by hand. It's amazing but even with solo butt plug experience I still came hard during her using the dildo and then reakised on the other side of my orgasm that I had not enough lube and was a bit tender on removal. So, i'll repeat, use the right lube and almost too much.
Same advice as the others ; dont forget the lube and if your up for it rimming might be the way to go.
Dont forget the protate can be stimulated by light pressure to the perineum ... can be better than direct stimulation sometimes
Have fun!
start very slowly just your fingertip on the outside and stick to that until you are both comfortable with that when you are ready for more with very neatly manicured fingernails and more lubrication than you think you need slowly insert and just work your way up communicating the whole time him telling you when he's ready for more and you telling him how much you enjoy bringing him this much pleasure and from a guy's perspective you communicating is probably the most important thing otherwise it feels like a bad trip to the doctor's office
From another post of mine in a different thread:- My ex-gf used to do this for me and I can vouch for it feeling amazing. Without too much repeating of all the usual about relaxed / lubricant, etc, I used to find that moderate rubbing from my back towards my front over the prostate from her inserted finger, whilst she used her other hand to masturbate me was the best feeling. Make sure there are no hang-ups about cleanliness so sort that out first. He will be aware of that sort of thing as well as you, so remove it as distraction before starting. If my ex-gf was using her mouth to suck me as well, even better. Lots of lubricant, moderate prostate stroking from back to tummy, steady rythmic full-length hand or mouth strokes on his penis, some reassuring hot words from you to show you're enjoying it too... neither of you will regret it. Match the moderate prostate stroke from back towards tummy with the down-stroke on his penis with your hand or mouth, and that's what felt best for me. I don't tend to find prostate massage on its own makes me cum, although I know some men can do this. If you both really get into it, suggest a bit of tying him up with his ankles spread and his hands above his head. The above, coupled with the lack of control he has will make it even better.