No wonder I've been struggling with this. I thought that seeing as I needed to build up to my partners size I should know what his measurements are. I am clearly really used to looking at him, and am used to his size because the actual numbers have shocked me.
5" girth and 7" length
I am now not surprised we have been struggling. We will going sssllloooowwwllllyyy and building our way up bit by bit for sure.
I'm shocked Amanda, I honestly would have guessed at least an inch less on both numbers. It's all good though, at least I know what I'm working with now :)
I think my face said it all to be honest, lol. He got to spank me with a paddle after though, so I think all is forgiven.
LadyS, when my OH decided she wanted to try anal she did exactly what has been suggested, she bought a range of plugs up to a size that was a bit bigger than me, she slowly started with each one until she was comfortable inserting and wearing it for at least an hour or two, it wasn't until she was comfortable with the biggest before she would allow me near her with my chap, we had used some small anal toys before so she could get used to feel, even now she wears a plug before we have anal just to get herself ready although we have had anal quite a few times without any prep as its easy to get in but with plenty of lube which is always important what ever your doing! She loves anal and her anal orgasms are always more intense than normal ones which is probably why we do anal ad often as any other sex! Douching is always a good habit to get into, makes it a lot pleasant and if you adventurous you can try other things, My OH didn't stop a my size plug and kept going so is up to a large plug now so I can now have a good explore of things down there!
I am new to all this anal sex thing always seen it as an exit not entrance lol...but the boyfriend is highly turned on by it all so want some advice on it to keep him happy and who knows it might me too. But the one time we tried was with no lube and it cained
I would also want to recommend the book:
The ultimate guide to anal sex for women: http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=1554
It has tons of information on toys how to use them and when, lube, anatomy sex positions etc etc.
It will really really help you understand what it is about and with information there is less tension = makes it comfortable and safe.
Find out how you like it. For me it's on my back kneeling down one leg up on a counter or pile pillows up and tummy down on them.
Then start with something small. Use lube a fair amount. Push it in let it slide out repeat a few times. If it's a plug leave it in for a bit if it's balls or beads play around and if it's a dildo I say do it when the house is empty and make sure it has a base so it won't go in and a thong so I don't shoot out. And walk around get comfortable.
Then moving up remove item. I like to force it out keeping a hand close and play a bit clean up and move up by lubing again and starting over.
I love bum play it's great fun. I am wearing a plug to sleep for the first time tonight.
Find out how you like it. For me it's on my back kneeling down one leg up on a counter or pile pillows up and tummy down on them.
Then start with something small. Use lube a fair amount. Push it in let it slide out repeat a few times. If it's a plug leave it in for a bit if it's balls or beads play around and if it's a dildo I say do it when the house is empty and make sure it has a base so it won't go in and a thong so I don't shoot out. And walk around get comfortable.
Then moving up remove item. I like to force it out keeping a hand close and play a bit clean up and move up by lubing again and starting over.
I love bum play it's great fun. I am wearing a plug to sleep for the first time tonight.
I had anal sex for the first time today! It was spontanious and I have never had anything bigger than a finger up there before. It went successfuly and I think it was because of lotsssss of foreplay like an hours worth at least? with him giving me lots of head and rim jobs and playing with his fingers. i'd just had an orgasm and we were spooning (becuse he was supposed to do an assinment and we got distracted so were calming down) and i rubbed my bum on his cock and he asked if i wanted to and i said i wasn't sure but could try and just tell him to stop if i didn't like it. I don't think I've ever seen a guy run for lube faster. He had me lie on my stomach with a pillow under my hips and lubed me up a lot and fingered my bum to make sure it went up there and then lubed his penis and slowlyyy pushed it in a bit, more lube, pushed it in a bit more and more lube took it out and more lube (always checking if i was alright) and he slowly put it all the way in and started thrusting.
It didn't hurt because of how relaxed it all was. And I think also helped there wasn't any expectations? I didn't feel pressured to be able to do it. Good luck! :)
I am a young lass but never even dabbled with this kind of thing so not sure where to start
Hi intreaged person. And welcome to the forums. Have you read the whole thread? Also on the main site there is a whole page on how to begin
Yes read hole thread just every time we try as soon as he enters I tense and then get the urge to go toilet so he has to stop, so guess I want technics to relax
Hi Intrigued,
I originally started this thread and for exactly the reason you stated above. Every time we try I just can't go past a certain point. I really, really want to do this so have got the following plan.
I got myself some toys, butt plug, anal prober and a dildo. I have been playing with these on my own. I haven't got as far as the dildo yet, but the plug and the prober were easy to accommodate. I figure they will get me used to having things enter that area.
The main thing I got from this thread was to go slow, so for now hubby even trying to enter me is off the cards. He can play there using the toys, then once I am comfortable with them, I am hoping that one day during a pretty hot session we might get the natural urge for him to try after a play with the toys. I am also going to make sure I am the one in control of him going in. As much as he tries not to move when I tell him not to, I think he still does it without thinking.
I think some people are lucky and can't just lube up and give a go and succeed. But I think for some of us, as this thread has shown it takes time and effort. I am just hoping it's worth it. If after all this I don't enjoy I will be pretty cross, lol.
Also is there anything worrying you about trying it? I realised I was actually pretty paranoid about mess. I was convinced that even though I had been to the toilet there would be something, so I bought an anal douche and after using it I realise there is unlikely to be too much mess.
Have you tried out any anal toys/fingers at all? Or has it just been him going straight for it?
x
He will try and play then go for it and just tense as soon as he gets close, just think cuz it's so alien to me I get nurvous! Just never seen it as something a woman could enjoy but loads have and sort of intrigued! Lol
I would definitely consider some anal toys to get you used to playing in that area, and doing it by yourself. This is was I have been doing and I think it is helping. Not only am I used to the general area being played with, but also I now know it is likely to feel like when he finally enters, not exactly i'm sure, but I have a better idea. So i think i'll be less tense when we finally get round to trying it again.
I actually measured my husband as well, so I knew I was getting toys that would compliment his size. So now I know if the toy goes in so will he, this had made me feel a lot calmer about it too.
x
My partner is not as large as yours admittedly, however I find him much easier to accomodate than any toys I have (even ones smaller than himself)
There is a lot more give in it than the toys have lol
Keep going, but don't over-think it or over-do it. Gently does it even if you only get half way first time, then build up. Be prepared for this to happen even after all of the toy training, as it will be a completely different sensation to your body. Think of it that, if he can get just a little further in each time you try then you're definitely suceeding x
Hope you can enjoy it soon =D
This thread has been so helpful OH has been desperate to try and I always say ok then tense or completly freak out...it sounds silly because ive had anal before with my ex who was wider and was no problem but now I just panic when he tries...there was no.bad experience to.cause this sudden panic but this has helped with some ideas xx
Can I just say thank you to LadyS for posting this thread and everyone who gave advice after reading through it I spoke to partner and we gave it another try last night still not completly there yet but we got further than we managed before xx
Pleased to hear that kayliixx. That's what LH is all about :)
Yeah only joined forums a few days ago but I love them, I love that you can ask anything or talk about anything without judgement or worrying someone will disapprove. I'm addicted haa xx