Hi, so I am looking for advice on how to share with my wife that I like to crossdress. I know she will automatically think I’m homosexual, but I’ve done it since I was a teenager. I do it for sexual gratification idk why but wearing lingerie and the feminine behavior gets me and I would like to include her to dominate me and peg me while cross dressing. HELP!!!
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Hello and welcome to the forum.
Only you can figure out the best way to introduce this, I can only offer a few ideas.
The simplest way is through clear open communication, explaining and asking for her acceptance.
Another approach which I used when dabbling was to make it fun. Swapping outfits for a kind of dress up night. Then comes the communication element where you have to explain how you feel and build from there.
It’s not easy, but from what you’re saying something you need to bring to the open.
Wishing you good luck.
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You havent said how long you have been together.?
Id imagine she will ask why you didnt mention this from the outset of your relationship. She may feel she had a right to have known before now.
She may well be cool with it, or find it unnerving.
There is only one way to find out, but be prepared for a less than positive reaction.
Revelations like this can have a major impact on a relationship.
If you have any inclination that it may not be well received, it may be better to park that side of your sexual makeup unless it is the overriding aspect of it.
Then you have to decide if being honest and allowing your cross dressing side to surface, is worth potentially loosing your wife.
However as I said, she may be cool and embrace it…maybe she already has an inclination.?
You havent said what your sex life is like together generally.
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Not a lot to add to the two replies above except that many years ago for Halloween my wife put me in one of her slinkier dresses , did my makeup , had me put on nylons and a pair of her panties . As a note back then she could drink and after the party she was pretty hot having her way with me . It was not until many years later while she was pretty drunk that she fingered my ass and I found out she had wanted to start anal fun on me for many years . She can no longer drink and even though she does not seem to get into it as much , she tolerates me dressing for play time . When you get more privileges you can skim my photos and see some of my wearing of lingerie . As the above posters said , only you can decide if and when you may reveal your desires .
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Totally agree it’s being open and honest and just speak to her
Ask to wear her knickers and express how good it feels
She will get the vibe
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I have been crossdressing since I was a teenager. Wife and I got together in my mid twenties. Kept the cd thing secret for a long time. Eventually she accepted I liked wearing satin pj’s (all womens) and she was happy with that. Ended up with 20 pairs, including very pretty pink ones with lace trim. After many years I told her the whole picture, that I cross dressed (fully). This didnt go down at all well. Lived apart for a short while, almost got divorced, went through several periods of counselling. I badically had to convince her that it was something I could stop doing. So got rid of everything and we got our relationship back on track. Things have never really been the same though.
Thats my story any way. Nearly lost everything. Mostly now regret having come clean but she is and always will be far more important to me.
She did say that she felt she should have handled it better and it shouldnt have been such a trauma, but you never really know how a person will react until facing the facts
I’ve just put a put post up about how my OH found out. All I can say is it might not be as bad as you think
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Usually my wife tolerates me , especially in panties and stockings . But yesterday while cleaning up our living room I picked up this really cute somewhat frilling crop top she had bought the grandson’s girlfriend that she did not like . I tested the waters by saying " oh you bought me a nice top ?" . I was immediately told she would kill me if I put that on . Not sure why ? She has dressed me up before and we often talk about our dads dressing in drag in the late 60s and into the 70s . No issue with that , and they did it in front of other people at parties . I just want to do it in the privacy of our house . She does not know I tried it on and it looked good on me and was just loose enough to brush my nipples to keep them hard . If I am brave I will ask why ? I would really like to keep that top .
All, thanks for the advice seems like you have conquered my fears!
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