Curious about the prostate

Ok I will hold my hands up as a woman and say I know nothing about the prostate.

My bf when I mention it to him also doesn’t know anything and when I ask if he wants to explore that area together he just laughs and says no lol

I know anal with men still holds lots of stigma of it being gay but I feel like if I put all the facts to my other half he could consider it. I’m not to fused about if he tries it or not but I can’t help think he is missing out on something.

So can anyone give me any advice. Does it cause an orgasm when played with? How does it feel? What toys are best for a beginner? Is it something he is missing out on? Is their any men here who have tried it and don’t like it?

I’m really interested in it as you might have noticed.


So I am a full on amateur with this, but I seem to be obsessed with anal play. I love exploring on Mrs. Val’s tight anus with my tongue and fingers - she is not a fan. She has made it quite clear that anal, in any form is a no go.

So I decided that I would spend a little time, money and toys on myself. I started by using the bullet I bought for Mrs. Val on myself. I love the feeling of being rimmed with a vibrator and having a finger or something bigger in there. It seriously takes the breath away when you are a virgin to it. Does your BF like anal touching? Does he allow you to put anything inside?

I then bought a T-bar vibrating butt plug which I introduced to my wife (who to this day I think believes it is for her…lol) I have had this all the way in myself on vibrate and experienced a fantastic orgasm. I have used her Tantric G-spot massager on myself and although can’t get it super deep, I did enjoy exploring myself with it. I have also bought her a curved glass dildo with individual sections for insertion. Currently I can only take the first bulb and can’t stretch any further.

I guess all in all, my obsession with female rimming and the fact that the a$$hole is so “forbidden” has made me want more. I really enjoy anal stimulation and have only scratched the surface with her exploring me.

  1. I think there is a “doctor/finger in the bum” stigma with this and most men won’t be up for it straight away
  2. He may think “gay thoughts” if 100% straight and be opposed mentally to letting you explore there
  3. Some of the reads on here are all about extended period of prostate orgasms which I am actually ok not trying yet. I actually really enjoy having the rim or entry area stimulated while orgasming and is a powerful tool to push me over the edge.

I’m interested to see if you have attempted anything around the anus on him and what his reaction was. I can’t get enough when Mrs. Val wants to explore and am trying to encourage her to spend more time on me with extra lube and toys. It’s a slow process and we go at her pace, but I do think she is missing out on how good it really feels when not forced or awkward.

Good luck!


Nope I’ve not introduced anything towards him around anal. He absolutely would not let my fingers go near him but I can’t say I blame him, I have claws and don’t even use my fingers on my self for that reason lol.
He loves doing anal with me though and we do it at least once a week. He also uses his tongue and fingers on me all the time and toys aswell. I love anal though and even though it hurts like hell we both enjoy it.
After we have had anal and I’m in pain in my bottom area I often joke how I’m going to peg him and see who is laughing then as he loves that it hurts and the noises I make and I say that in a non abusive way.
I’ve asked if I can use toys on him and he tells me to go away but all in a joking way. Im just curious to know if I tried something small he could enjoy it and he has been missing out all these years :joy:


I’ve defo tried it and think there is something to behold here about prostate play, obviously we’re all different and not everyone likes the first time sensation but when in the moments of bliss the added stimulation of the prostate can truly take things up to the next level for a guy if done right.

I’d recommend to try starting out with some prostate massagers not necessarily with vibrations as that can be something you can explore into once accustomed to things.
Even if you was to first try a smooth finger up the bum as they say the length of the index finger I think is enough to reach a man’s prostate and can stimulate it.


I’m definitely going to put the idea to him and see what he thinks. It could awaken a whole new side to him. I think it’s just one of them things you have to try to know either way. I think he thinks it’s really painful aswell but that’s just because I’m a wuss and scream at anything lol

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I’m sorry I know nothing about anal from a man’s perspective since my OH won’t consider it but I just wanted to comment on your previous post - anal shouldn’t hurt, maybe you need to do a little more warming up with something smaller during foreplay? I’m assuming you’re using plenty of lube? It sounds like you are still happy to have anal sex so this comment is probably totally unhelpful but I just wanted to check that you were ok with it since I worry when I hear that someone finds it painful x


I’ve done anal so many times in the past with previous partners and lots of time not even using lube but my OH has a very large penis and that’s in length and thickness. We use so much lube and always play with toys first but I’m always in pain with him. It’s not that bad that I can’t do it but I do have to grip my teeth. It took us months to be able to achieve it. I’m not in pain so much after now though which is good. I would definitely take any suggestions on board to help with the pain.

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I’m not really an expert since my OH isn’t particularly large. The only thing i could suggest is wearing a butt plug for a while before sex to open up a bit first, and then play with a dildo or plug that is bigger than the first one but still smaller than your OH for a while before he penetrates you. You’ve probably already tried all that though? Have a search through old threads to see if this has been discussed before, if not it might be a good idea to start a new topic rather than derailing this one?


For me the most successful prostate play has been when my OH has pegged me with her strap-on, we bought a g-spot strap-on which works perfectly when the dildo is angled towards the prostate, strangely for me its not as much a orgasms as whats known as prostate milking, I sort of leak cum, I can even be soft and it will slowly come out, not even an ejaculation, it feels really different and looks cool as cum is slowly coming out without any penis stimulation, I have tried solo prostate play with toys I bought but so far that hasn’t been as successful.
As for men and anal play the only taboo is with the ignorant, there is nothing gay about straight men wanting to try anal play, I’d also say pegging is a very liberating sexual act especially for the woman as it gives them the bit of dominant control. My OH absolutely loves being in control and having the cock. If he’s open to it I’d definitely say give it a try. Pegging is very popular with couples recently, I’m sure you both won’t regret it. Have fun. XxX


There is also a really good thread for prostate play here which has lots of first hand accounts


I’m NOT a pro, but I think that if it hurts that bad, you are rushing it and definitely need to take it slower, stretch and lube more. Any insertions I do are definitely slow and methodical. Loads of lube and other stimulation to help me relax.

His apprehension likely has to do with your pain and thus the brakes are on. There should be some pleasure with it and not just agony!


I definitely feel pleasure but I do also enjoy pain In the bedroom so it definitely works for us. I wouldn’t say we are rushing though, which is why it’s odd. We play in that area so much before hand. I just think it’s down to being big.


I’m in opposite situation! Still not up to mentioning it to my missus. Have bin fingered before n it’s amazing!!! Bought a toy for myself last time she was away n it was amazing, didn’t climax from it but takes time to get there iv bin told. There is a massive stigma bout it, shouldn’t be but there is. Get a few drinks in him, go down on him n play with his arse with your tounge 1st n he will defo be more intrigued

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Yes. Absolutely. Though prostate orgasms feel quite different to the ones he’ll feel when he ejaculates.
Prostate stimulation and orgasms tend to stimulate a lot of prostatic fluid or pre-cum for me that leaks out rather than shoots out. The orgasm’s less explosive and more of a long, drawn out warm, slowly building whole body experience.
I’m a fan of prostate orgasms timed to coincide with a more standard penile orgasm. Both together feels :drooling_face::smiling_face_with_three_hearts:.

I would say something not much bigger around than a thumb to begin with, and a little flexible but not too flexible. I’d avoid rigid materials like glass or steel to start as they’re unforgiving.
The ideal for me is something with a prominent head or slightly hooked shape, to direct the pressure into the front wall of the rectum. G-spotting toys are the right sort of
If you imagine the shaft of the erect penis has a root that extends to near the anus. The prostate, is slung on top of this root, and the balls are slung underneath.

Well, yes and no, basically.
The prostate is stimulated internally by the body’s sexual arousal and movements and plays a bit part in normal ejaculation. Cum is a mixture of prostatic fluid, and semen, so the prostate is involved in the more commonly experienced type of orgasm. It’s just that some people like to get intimately acquainted with this aspect of their genitalia and have extra fun with it :wink:
The fact that it’s accessed via the rectum puts a lot of people off. And it’s their body and their choice at the end of the day.

I didn’t enjoy the experience of putting things in my butt to begin with. There’s a lot of nerve endings back there, so it’s super sensitive, and the anus is designed to keep stuff in, so relaxing it to put external objects in felt quite alien to start. Once I learned to open up (by gently pushing out to ‘open the doors’) it became bit by bit more relaxed and pleasurable. And then prostate play became waaay more accessible and exciting.

I’ve enjoyed prostate play solo, and with my wife, and both can be alot of fun. It can make me feel super submissive and very vulnerable, so for me in particular, it’s not an everyday thing by any means. But the mood does take me on the odd occasion. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:


Hi im a straight guy and love my prostate played with have for years but im very open minded .ive done alot of stretching with toys on my own or with a partner . I just bought the lovehoney high roller.when it turned up i thought it wouldnt satisfy as ive had alot of big toys up there​:see_no_evil::see_no_evil:.but i have to say wow wow wow this little prostrate toy will blow his mind i was shocked how good it was ive had mine for 4 days and ive used it everyday i carnt get enough of it especially in a tight pvc catsuit​:blush::blush: . I promise after using this toy you will both want to use it over and over again making him sqirming and moaning like your little bitch .when you cum using this toy it will turn you on so much and blow your mans mind.its not a gay thing i think its more kinky .but give it a go and definitely recommend the high roller 10 out of 10

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Great advice @Knottydevil.

I would add that for the first time if he’s up for it, make sure he’s really horny. Don’t cum for a few days and make sure there’s plenty of foreplay before putting stuff up there. That will make sure the prostate is engorged and will make the feeling of it being stimulated more noticeable. Its hard to tell if you’ve got the right spot otherwise if he’s not ‘primed’ for it so to say. Also being super horny lowers your inhibitions a lot and are more likely to want to have a go and be more successful with it!

First time putting a toy up there, the stretch can be a little off putting as the muscles want to tighten up initially. Once it’s in just leave it there and relax for a bit. Do some penile play in the meantime and then can start to try move the toy up and down rubbing the prostate anteriorly. It may have a strange ‘need-to-pee’ sensation at first until your brain re-wires to recognise the new sensations of pleasure.

Hope he has a go and has fun!


Yes exactly! Need to dive in and try it to know if it’s something he likes or not but from what I’ve heard most men become converted to anal play even if it’s just a little finger teasing.

Haha! Nah it’s defo not painful but first time can feel rather weird so always good to lube up plenty and take it slow :relieved:

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Few years ago I didn’t know what a prostrate gland was apart form hearing about some bad stories of prostrate cancer.

Then I read about male prostrate orgasms.

I read a lot of different articles and blogs and bought myself a rotating and vibrating prostate massager which my long term wife is fine with.

My wife has rimned me in the past and I asked her to lube and use her fingers on me (works but better with latex or nitrile gloves). She said she found felt my prostate and rubbed it was locking sucking my balls and cock and anytime I go to close to cuming I told her and she left my balls and Penis alone for a while. She got quite a bit of pre cum out then using her mouth I had a really awesome orgasms with her finger still inside me.

Her hand gets tired after a while I and I’ve built up a collection of butt plugs and anal dildo and can have a great milking session by myself and am currently very close to a prostate orgasms but for me it’s a hard thing to achieve but fun trying. We sometimes wear butt plugs together etc it mixes it up nicely. Have fun.


Any tips on manual prostate massage? Prostate massager attachment for wand arrived today but it doesn’t fit it​:sob::sob:…my heart was set on it. Never tried manually, any help will be sooo much appreciated

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I got my wife drunk one night and asked her while she was giving me head, to suck my balls, the. I asked her to go lower, to the place between my balls and ass, then I asked her to go lower! Lol

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