No - I can say that I have never for one minute felt that pegging brought my sexuality into question. Perhaps that is because after so long together I'm not only not interested in sex with a man I'm not interested in sex with anyone but my wife.
And then there is the actual situation when being pegged - I'm looking up at my wife with the straps of the harness accentuating her waist and hips like a suspender belt on steroids and my manhood is being massaged from outside and in. I'm watching the rise and fall of her breasts as she thrusts and her soft voice urges me to give myself up to what she is doing to me.
If that's gay then OK...
I wasn't offending anyone I just wanted peoples views due to a situation I am in I do not think there is anything gay about enjoying anal play I thoroughly enjoy it it is something we do a lot but my oh is thinking maybe that is what he would like and just wondered from a man's point of view if others have felt the same or not
Ok here's another one for you ( hope you don't mind me butting in luv bunny .)
Do all men who enjoy anal play question there sexuality ? or is it just that they enjoy anal and no there straight .
Feeling confused .
Don't think I worded this right sorry if I offended anyone , I certainly never meant to x
I don't think you've offended anyone Elle and em, and I didn't mind you butt-ing in, hehe!
I've addressed the whole bum fun issue with my OH thus evening, and well, not sure he's changed his mind any, but I can still enjoy my butt toys on my own. And occasionally surprise him with the vibrating butt plug during mutual play time! 😝
When me and OH were considering anal this was a worry and I did quite a lot of research and I couldn't find anything medical that says loose bottom is a problem unless you do perminant damage by doing something really really stupid. However like all muscles they can need keeping in good shapes so like pelivic floors after pregnancy or lack of fitness. Assume it's the same for our arse as well?
I wonder if this idea that any play leaves a loose bum is a throw back to less informed times where bottom action was assumed to be homsexual and therefore automatically deviant.
As for men and bottoms, I for one am 100% straight and its just plain feels good and I only found out checking myself out when I was worried I might be getting chalfonts.
Elle & em - Sorry if I gave the impression I was offended, I'm not, and the question you ask is fine. When I first started evangelising about pegging (inconveniently before there was even that term to codify what I was talking about) it was pretty much the main question people had, and the one that gave most angst. I got into a lot of hot water on some (mainly USA based) forums back then as there were those who clearly saw the whole thing as sinful and would wish to save others from descending into the same pit by questioning the sexuality of anyone who would consider doing it. The logic often ran something like "if you like a dildo up the ass you gotta be a f@gg0t. period...." - a prescience apparently only given to those from a long line of first cousins (I guess you can see how I got into trouble!)
I'm glad it's now so main-stream it hardly counts as a kink any more. I will have to try harder.
I read an article once a long time ago where a study was conducted on two groups of men.
One group had never received any sort of anal play ever. The second were actively enjoying anal play.
It was conducted over a set period of time where the group who did have anal play had to do so every day for this set period of time.
At the start of the experiment they tested the mens ability to squeeze onto a slim object inserted into them - if I rememebr correctly it was as slim as a pencil.
After the testing period was over, the same experiment was repeated, to see who could 'grip' tighter.
Both results showed the men who received anal play had better muscle control.
They put it down to these men having control over the sphincter muscles and also working the muscles more in terms of relaxing, stretching and squeezing to build up strength and hence have a better set of muscles down there.
Really, you do run a risk of damage if you are stupid. A chef runs the risk of slicing their finger off with a knife if they arent careful.
Listen to your body, be patient with yourself and you will have lots of fun!