Sup guys. I've been searching online for ages for a proper male masturbator. Not those shitty rotating battery powered devices that you still have to hold. I'm after a hands free device that has actual grip and power. I even thought about building myself one because there literally isn't any available.
I always jerk off at my desk watching porn so I thought about perhaps something that sits on your lap. Don't get me wrong there are a lot of battery powered masturbators but 100% hands free is what I'm after. A remote to control speeds etc would also be cool.
I'm willing to spend a few hundred dollars if need be. There are so many female fuck machines but none for me... sad times.
Something like this http://i.onionstatic.com/onionstudios/1738/16x9/800.jpg but with a piston so it can move up and down a good 6 or 7 inches.
An ideal toy would be a a clamp that is attached to a frame that I can just insert my fleshlight into and the hydralic arm just just goes up and down and twists. How hard can it be for a company to make something like that. You know how many men want hands free experience? I might even start a kickstarter my fucking self.
For what it's worth, this thrusting sex machine has a male attachment and you can use your Fleshlight sleeves in the clear cylinder:
http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=32248
Bit tricky to use under a desk perhaps, depending on the set up of your desk. Could be easier to make your porn mobile via a phone or tablet.
To answer your question on why it doesn't exist, probably because it wouldn't sell. You may be willing to pay several hundred dollars. But not many people would pay that sort of money simply to not have to hold a toy while watching porn while sitting at their desk, probably not near enough to cover the costs of developing/producing the machine.
It's pretty easy to make toys handsfree yourself with a bit of imagination/googling too. Guys have been doing it for years. Another reason they wouldn't pay big bucks for it.
If you do try to create a kickstarter, I'd refrain from calling other toys shitty and really adopt a better attitude in general first, you're not the first to think of or want this sort of thing so no need to act like companies worldwide are idiots for not making an extremely specific device