Extreme Premature Ejaculation

I have always suffered from premature ejaculation; since my first sexual experience. Now I am 33 and I orgasm as soon as my OH touches my penis. Even when I masturbate, I can only last two or three strokes. I have tried patches, creams, sprays and even Priligy. The only thing that has worked is delay spray but it is so numbing.
So my question is: what else can I do? I am fortunate that my OH is very understanding but I have huge performance anxiety and I want to sort it.

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First thing forum rules means sex starts at 18 (I suggest a change before this is deleted)

@SexGod2314

Done. Apologies

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Do you stay hard after ejaculating or go soft? If you stay hard just keep going if you go soft then edging training, exercise and desensitisation training are the only things that work and look into tantric methods too.

I used all these to prolong erections without coming so more time and pleasure can be had together. But it’s not an overnight fix.

@JGood Can you please explain these methods that worked for you.

I’ll do my best

Edge training - if it’s extreme as mentioned then just watching, listening or reading about sex should cause an erection. If someone comes from no physical touching then before cumming pinching below the glands or base of the cock can stop the need to cum. Control the breathing (read about tantric practice for this) and then repeat once the need has passed. Keep practicing once a day or whenever you can. If you need more information @GEVETISH I can add more but there’s now lots of information now here an o the health forums to guide. I was learning this when the book press was new.

Exercise is based around kegal exercise and core development if you can increase the pelvic floor muscles so that you can stop you own pee mid stream and start again you can drastically increase you ability to not cum. You can even practice you exercises while having sex and piv (penis in vagina) legal exercises are well worth the try. The core is just for basic stamina and so cardio doesn’t hurt especially if carrying a few extra points @MrGoodGuy is a role model and inspiring man when it comes to this part.

Desensitising is finding what your triggers truly are case in point would be a redhead in floral flowing summer dress with no underwear on and the sun setting behind her while she dances in the field. My imagination of that encounter from my past gets the heart pumping every time. So I desensitised to its influence enough to not make it difficult to exist. Cold temperatures seemed to work best for me. Ice cubes and a fleshlight nowadays so if close switch to the cold device to ouch you back if it’s just seeing breasts take the mystery out the equation just find the trigger we are all different and the either back down with it or even using the gels to do the work.

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@JGood Thanks
Will wait for @MrGoodGuy to share his thoughts and ideas

Sorry to hear of your struggles, including that you struggle even to last when masturbating. Lots of good suggestions from @JGood on trying to train with edging and kegels to last a bit longer.

Are you able to go for multiple rounds per day? For example, would masturbating some time before you’re with OH help you last longer?

Other thoughts I had would include using condoms or penis sleeve to reduce stimulation and/or allow you to keep penetrating (in a sleeve/extender) even after you cum without being overstimulated.

Also, glad to read your OH is understanding and supportive. You don’t say specifically so correct me if I’m wrong in assuming OH is a woman, but do you have the kind of sex where she’s open to receiving full attention and pleasure to orgasm before you get to penetration? Does she like receiving oral, manual, or toy stimulation from you so that if you don’t penetrate until she has cum it doesn’t really matter how long? I know for myself when I go down on my wife and don’t enter her until she’s cumming I ride the tail end of her orgasm and rarely is it longer than a minute.

I hope you’re not offended by my laughing emoji, it’s the way you worded it all. You brightened up my night. :face_with_hand_over_mouth:

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I’m like total opposite where I can last forever and not climax in front of anyone… maybe we can give each other a little bit of what we have to balance out lol

I have always been ridiculous too. Even over 50, doggy was one push and over. In my least favourite position missionary (don’t like the angle) I could last up to a minute if I really tried and thought of the washing up or something.

Yet if my other half tried oral on me, she got bored after a few minutes even with gaps and I am nowhere near. Same with mutual masturbation, she would finish before me, totally weird.

However there was a cause for me, severe lifelong phimosis which I only realised I suffered from about a year ago after an injury forced action. It caused serious over-sensitivity which has now been addressed, and now in recovery stage. Will update timings over the next few months :innocent:

@SexGod2314 your not the only 1 with this problem. I recently suffered from this and my wife is 13 years younger than me and by god its frustrating when it happens. My trouble is I get over excited because her woman cave is tight even though she has had 2 sprogs. I feel so disappointed when it happens an now it gets to me an I know its letting her down, but I do make sure she cums first when we have foreplay.
If there is anyother people here with suggestions that would help massively :+1:

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Combining Kegels exercises with edging is one approach. The edging technique can be used by the man to avoid ejaculating before the woman has climaxed. It involves getting aroused through stimulation, backing off on the stimulation and going to a lower arousal level, and then repeating the arousal/backing off cycle. This is repeated over and over again until finally the final arousal with ejaculation is done. Since it takes a woman much longer to climax than the man, it is very beneficial for the man to practice some form of edging. Edging can allow the man to delay ejaculation for 12 minutes or longer. Since the average time for a woman to orgasm is 13 minutes, edging is very useful. Kegels exercises can be very helpful with holding back the orgasm and holding the erection during edging. A big benefit of edging is that, when the climax and ejaculation eventually occur, the climax can be full body and many times stronger than the localized sensation in the groin that comes from not using edging. Sex therapist Helena Nista also has a video that describes the edging process. Kegels also help with the edging process. Pelvic floor therapist Michelle Kenway has a YouTube video that provides a Kegels exercises beginners guide for men. Kegels trains twitch muscle fibers in the pelvic floor. The slow twitch fibers are endurance fibers, and they work for extended periods of time. Fast twitch fibers are for fast, strong contractions. For the exercises, Michelle Kenway describes the technique as simultaneously (1 retracting the penis inwards as if a turtle is drawing its head in, (2 tightening and lifting around the anus opening, and (3 thinking about passing urine. The slow twitch fiber exercise is done 10 times for 10 seconds each, and the fast twitch fiber exercise is done 10 times for 1 second each. Both of these 10 times sequences should be done at least 3 times a day and for at least 3 days of the week.

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Does this technique work

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That looked like a copy and paste from a book. it wouldn’t have worked for me.

AI generated.
Dont understand why they bother.

It works for me, and I have seen Kegels and edging endorsed by many on other sex advice forums. The text that I posted is not AI generated. It is based on research and experience.

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I’ve always suffered from PE. When I was younger I used to discreetly have a wank before having sex and it did help, but now I’m older I would struggle to get it back up if I did this. I’ve also used delay spray which works really well. I found this helped with my PE and got my body used to not cuming so quickly and after using for a while I found I didn’t need to use it anymore. Unfortunately My PE come back. We don’t have sex that often now anyway but when we do I either just put up with it and please her orally or with a toy afterwards or use viagra so I’m good to carry on for round 2 afterwards and then I can last

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One purpose of the Kegels exercises is to train the fast twitch muscle fibers that control the ejaculation. If the fast twitch muscle fibers are trained, I would think that would help with PE. Maybe when the delay spray is used, the muscles get conditioned by it. If Kegels are done (in the right way) instead, they may do the same conditioning.

I got the same problem, because of this its making my sex life nonexistent. My wife thinks shes the issue but I have told her its like being alot younger and making me nervous.

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