So I recently floated the idea of using a dildo in a hot role play scenario to my partner and although we both obviously have been curious on the subject we never had a desire to fulfill it for obvious reasons of people who choose not to introduce other people into their relationship in that way. When I am fully aroused this does feel like a good idea and a compromise that means we can peak curiosity without the hurt or jealousy of introducing a 3rd party which would affect the relationship alot cause we are both very emotional. When I am less aroused the idea and thought doesn't seem as attractive and it's making me a little confused. I am curious on peoples opinion if even having a faux 3sum with a dildo can still perhaps be a bad idea psychologically for the relationship or am I just over thinking it cause its 3am and I cant sleep haha. Just wondering is there a chance toy or not even though it's just us, could I regret it and change a dynamic in the relationship or is it something I should just get on with and if I am not fussed on it just tell her I didn't enjoy it as much as I thought and we just leave it as that one time experimental thing. What do you guys think? I dont usually do this or ask for backing to help me with this kind of mental thing but I do think a little community sway or if some experts weighed in it would make me either feel better about doing it or perhaps make me more sure of what I want to do with this fantasy. Cause it is a fantasy and with any other girl this would be straight forward but this relationship I cherish very much and dont want to take unnecessary risks. Thanks for indulging me hope this doesn't come across stupid.
do you allready use toys ? if you do i cant see how you could regret it to be honest its just a toy after all maybe you could make yourself a clone ( clone a willy im not a mad scientist !) and use it on her then its just you twice lol weve done that an it is fun
Yeah we already use some toys restraints candles feathers etc. Toys where the pleasure still lands solely on my responsibility you know. I'm just the type of person that over thinks things alot. Yeah its handy when it comes to finer details in sex but also has the con. The intimidation factor I guess is the reason why alot of mean get intimidated by toys you cant compare against a dildo it is what it is consistent. Dont get my wrong our relationship is strong enough I know this wont change anything she wont want to do anything outside the relationship and stuff. I think you get my train of thought about this even though it is a little irrational. It's just that thing like a woman imagines 2 guys and a guy imagines 2 girls. If both parties are straight then the cross over isnt so attractive or it would provoke negative responses. She can have that 3 some experience of having another guy but u cant have that experience of being with another woman. There is fake parts but come on they arent that good for men really. I dunno again I'm over thinking it but hey, that's what this community I imagine is about helping people put fears the rest and guide them through the wilderness that is sex toys lol
If a realistic looking dildo is a step too far for you right now then there are plenty of non-realistic ones you could try first? And they come in a variety of different sizes. Mrs Chimp is more into glass and steel dildos, though we also have a large collection of rabbits and g-spot vibrators (and pretty much every other toy shape too 🙂).
I'd also recommend a Fleshlight for yourself. I've got the Blow Job Turbo one and I think it's great (especially if you warm it up). 👍
I have done this as husband has made it clear getting a third person involved is and will always be a hard limit for him. He wasn't overly keen on the idea, but we have done it a few times when he has shown willing.
The first time I had a LH dildo to test ('oh darling, I might just bounce and 'test' at the same time as giving oral') so he doesn't have to look at aforementioned dildo.
The second time was whilst I was testing a fucking machine, and I must say he practically leapt on me because he (surprisingly to himself as much as me I think) found himself getting turned on watching me on the machine. Because of this experience, I don't think he would be concerned in the slightest anymore if I wanted to use a dildo at the same time as him.
I would give it a go if your partner is willing, and if he feels that uncomfortable then you can right it off and never do it again. Good luck.
I ve never really thought about this before but we do this all the time really just not with an accurate cock shape ! i love her sucking me while she plays with herself but the best is her tied up me useing a magic wand on her as i use her mouth when she moans its feels f"£$" fantastic
My lady often says she fantasises about being DP'd, but neither of us will accept another cock being involved. We agree that we are both allowed to fantasise, but there is a very strict line between fantasy and reality. Having said that, she loves having a butt plug in while having vaginal sex as it fulfills the feeling of being DP'd. It works for me too, as she becomes a lot tighter when she has a plug in. We are also more likely to have anal, which we both love.
We often use a vibrating plug in her anus during PIV sex. It makes her orgasms much more intense and it is tighter and more stimulating for me as I can feel the vibrations too.
Personally I do not feel intimidated by her use of toys. In fact I find it quite arousing watching her when she masturbates with a toy or when she uses a clitoral vibrator to achieve orgasm during PIV or anal sex. (She cannot orgasm reliably without direct clitoral stimulation and, if I'm honest, her orgasm is actually far more important than mine).
Her use of toys basically reassures me that she still desires sex and orgasms and also that she is prepared to take responsibility for her own orgasms rather than relying on me to provide them.
Similar experiences here to, with the OH using a vibrator on herself during oral sex. Advice would be to take it slow, your suggested route is I would have thought is less risky than introducing a third party.Kinky Couple 12399 wrote:
I ve never really thought about this before but we do this all the time really just not with an accurate cock shape ! i love her sucking me while she plays with herself but the best is her tied up me useing a magic wand on her as i use her mouth when she moans its feels f"£$" fantastic
We have recently been doing this after talking about having a threesome. So we thought a bit of role play might help.oh my god it drives us both wild so much so we have made the first moves in doing it for real. Honestly give it a try you wont be disappointed as it leaves my OH dripping wet.