Fitness and sex

Hey, so I’ve always been a big man for my entire life and not someone who found exercise as a priority.
I’ve done some huge learning about mentality and positivity and set myself the goal to lose 12 pounds in three months. Two weeks in I have already lost seven pounds and an inch off my stomach :grin:
Anyway, my question specifically was has anyone gone from being unfit to a reasonable standard of fitness and did this have a significant improvement on your sex life? If so, how did it improve things?


Loosing weight is always a positive, always going to benefit your life in numerous ways including your sex life. It’ll increase you stamina, your flexibility, your endurance etc Also I’ve found when I’ve lost weight before, it makes my dick look a little bit longer so that is nice.

Seems like you have set yourself sensible goals. Keep it up, remember that you will always loose a lot at first, then it starts to slow down and get a little harder. Don’t be too tough on yourself if you don’t make the progress you’d hoped though, its a marathon not a race.


I went from 17st to 12st and although I did no additional exercise I obviously felt a great deal fitter just through carrying so much less weight around.

I think the improvement in my sex life was due more to my much improved self image and confidence in my appearance.


It’s a massive help.
I’ve gone from 105kg to 75kg, and back up and down again.
Lockdown piled on pounds for me. Back up to 100kg.
Currently at 90kg and training again and better at eating.
Increased confidence, sense of well being, more energy are all benefits. Plus I have the strength to hold myself up in a press up!
My wife too - she dances, does yoga and we walk a lot.
A meditation practice too - keeps the mind settled :man_in_lotus_position:t2:
In my life I have been very overweight and didn’t feel good in myself at those times, my libido disappeared and I had really low self esteem.
I find that extra confidence, more energy and the feeling that I’m more physically capable has helped me a lot.
Lastly I’d say that sex, for me and very much for my wife, is about getting out of our heads, and into our bodies.
Exercise really helps us with that.
Sounds like you’re doing great!
Keep it up. Hope you’re feeling good :blush:


Thanks everyone, for the first time in my life I do get that buzz after exercise and feel great for having done a great workout so that does give me a lot of hope.
I do look forward to being able to do things I wasn’t strong enough for before like sex up against a wall etc and the increased stamina in more vigorous sessions :rofl:
This recent change has come from finding a great exercise program that covers strength, flexibility and fitness while helping me understand and manage mindset first. That owning my mentality was a HUGE step forwards and so excited for the future


Can’t say first hand for myself but studies have shown leading an active healthy lifestyle and losing excess weight does contribute to a more invigorating sex life paired with a more positive outlook for mental well-being

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I’m the opposite way around. I lost quite a bit of weight after having covid as I was quite unwell with it. Going below my normal weight range and a few “you look like you’ve lost weight” comments, it spooked me into wanting to put some weight on, and hopefully build some muscle. I usually get comments about how skinny I am and had been I’ve been telling myself for a while I need to start working, but the weight loss was the extra kick I needed to try stick to a regular work out and diet. Nothing fancy, just some bodyweight exercises and hitting protein intake goals.

It’s only been a month so not really tipping the scales much but heading in the right direction. I’m definitely feeling stronger though and better about myself which seems to translate into slightly more appetite for sex. Although I’m sure that can come down to many other factors. Hopefully I can maintain the motivation which is the main problem. It’s pretty hard to keep to a workout schedule when I work full time, have a 12mo child and am the chef of the house! Making time is a squeeze :sweat_smile:

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Steve here, as an ex personal trainer, nutritionist/dietitian, exercise helps you in so many ways, mentally is a massive one, your mindset can change so much, through just the simple release of endorphins of doing something that your not use to doing and achieving something, I always use to tell my clients always do 1 thing positive in the morning before we have a session, like make your bed or send a nice message to a love one.

But back to weight loss they say depending on weight and trying to lose fat and gain muscle at the same time you will take about 4 weeks to start that process, 8 weeks for others to notice and 12 weeks for you to notice, this isn’t always the case I would have a guess it’s more like 50/50 in people noticing in that time frame, when loosing weight ensure your losing it healthily and drink lots of water!! When starting don’t push yourself to hard and stretch when you exercise your muscles are like bluetac when cold it snaps when it’s warmed up it stretches.

So sexy drive healthy mind and body 100% improves your sex drive, and even the way you have and feel sex, as your more happy in your own body you feel more comfortable to do and try more things too.

Sounds like your already doing a top job download a free app called my fitness pal if your just trying to loose weight that can help you so much I got my mum to do that when I was training her so she could keep tabs on what she was eating at home, and after a week I could also see where she was going wrong food wise too, so after a little lesson with her on food as well as training her, she lost 24kg in 6 months.

Good luck on hitting your goal sounds like your going to smash it easy! Keep up the good work!


Well done on your weightloss and for making changes to help you feel better as ultimately thats what its all about.

When I went from being fit to unfit I wasn’t sexually active but for me my sexual confidence does not come from my body image. It is mindset for me and that gives me body confidence. It does help that my sexual partner loves my body :grin:


I’m naturally a petite person, but whenever I’m sticking to a regular workout routine, I notice that I feel better about my body because I feel stronger, whether there’s a noticeable change or not (and whether I’m actually stronger or not :joy: ), and that gives me extra confidence… I already have a pretty high sex drive, so the only thing that really changes is if I overdo it and am sore, I won’t want to try out a difficult sex position :upside_down_face:


I can’t say I have gone from one extreme to another like that as I have always been very fit having surfed, climbed mountains, done ironmans etc ever since I was college aged, however every single study done into the subject is pretty clear that being reasonably fit and healthy improves your sex life either through increased physical fitness and vigour or simply better body image and a more positive sense of self.

That’s not to say someone who isn’t ‘fit’ (which is a relative term by the way) won’t have a great sex life, but on the whole getting fitter will only improve things for you.

Actually one of my fondest memories when I was younger was having sex with a girlfriend in the gym, all sweaty and sexy in her tight shorts and sports bra!

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