Heard about the kink of “free use” yesterday … and had lots of fun thinking about how that might work … does anyone here play with that as part of their dynamic?
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I’ve done it. There are two ways, one where 1) you basically can have sex (or do other sexual things) whenever you want, and the other where 2) see ‘1’, but they basically ignore you and just continue doing whatever they were doing… there’s obviously some in between grey areas at times.
We do 1 within set periods and parameters. I’ve done 2, but not really any more.
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So #2 sounds like when a dog starts humping your leg and everyone pretends its not happening 
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As the one who always does the ‘using’, I, in this particular scenario you described, would be the dog.
I’ve been called worse.
Explain more about what this kink entails? 
Basically… the person being used consents to being sexually used whenever the user wants e.g whilst cooking, sleeping, eating, bathing, working etc.
In other words, they can be used freely.
As to what the sexual activity is would, as always, be pre-agreed during initial discussions.
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As you’d suspect it lends itself well to the D/s dynamic
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Ooh how intriguing! Sounds rather fun 
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Still totally confused- ???
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It’s basically a dom / sub play kink in which one person agrees to sex whenever the other person wants, and however they want. There are usually pre-defined and pre-agreed limits and prameters eg not bringing in another person, no anal, no public play etc.
I’ll give an example…
You agree with your boyfriend that you can be ‘free used’ (I don’t know if you’re in a relationship or not, but you are for the purpose of my example).
Now whenever he wants, it doesn’t matter if you’re in the mood or not, and it doesn’t matter what you’re doing at the time, he can have you do sexual things to him/do sexual things to you.
You’re watching tv? Boom, suck this.
You’re doing work? Boom, get on all fours.
You’re sleeping? Boom, not any more.
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It’s not necessarily a dom/sub play kink. It can be done without dom/sub, and indeed, we have done so.
I’ll blog about it at some point, but we’ve ended up with a group of 5 other couples from our village that do free use parties. My husband and I have done two, one like (1) in the second post and one like (2) in the second post.
I enjoyed both, but I actually think (2) is more fun. Certainly takes concentration keeping a conversation going when you’re being shagged. We’ve got another one later this month.
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Not exactly a kink, but just a normal part of my relationships. Unless I’m really sick, I refuse to say No. I like the pleasure of sex, but even without the pleasure I don’t deny my partners. If all my husband wanted to do was drop my shorts and leave his sperm inside me at random, that’s part of what I’m here for.
The closest to this I get as a kink is with my GF. When we started our relationship years ago, she thought I was unique and wanted to keep me. So, she takes care of me and in return she owns my cream. The catch is that when she demands it, I have to produce. Sometimes that means in front of others, like GF’s friends. Sometimes she’ll lick it up herself, but a lot of it I end up having to swallow myself.
Firstly, that sounds amazing!
For sure it can be done without a D/s dynamic, all I guess I’m getting at here is that it lends itself well into that type of relationship ie ‘I’m having sex with you whenever, wherever, and however I want’… depends what exactly the situation and agreement is though, of course. Either way, it’s semantics.
Please shout when the blog post is out. Would love to have a read!
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Depends what you’d consider a ‘kink’ I guess. Broadly speaking I’d consider it as being along the lines of a sexual activity or preference that is not ordinary or is maybe unconventional…
There are plenty of things that I do regularly that I think now are pretty vanilla, but are probably still not accepted as ‘normal’ eg rimming, impact play, bondage etc - so I’d still call them kinks.
I think that a lot of these things seem quite normal on this forum, because there are a lot of sexually charged and adventurous people on here who talk about it regularly, and it becomes normalised, but they’re probably still not ‘normal’.
I had a conversation with work people recently where the topic of pegging came up. Of about 8 of us, only two of us knew what it was and I was sat there awkwardly explaining how it works. This spiralled into conversation about other sexual things where I was quickly reminded that the majority of people seem to think that having sex in another room of the house is a frisky night.
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Blog post will be a while. I have a cake morning with the girls later in the week to discuss the blog post and find out what they are happy for me to put etc. When I’m writing about other peeps, I do like to make sure they are happy with it etc.
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Not something that I think the OH would be into, though with a whisper in her ear and if she is feeling horny, there have been many impromptu sex sessions.
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Mira! I’ve been reading your blog today 
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@KinkyMira I’m looking forward to reading your take on free use at some point.
We’ve experimented with this from time to time. I’ve been bent over whilst my other half has had his phone balanced on my backside so he can watch porn whilst using me like a toy for his pleasure. I really enjoy it, especially if he doesn’t speak and just does as he needs then zips up and walks away.
He’s also done similar a few times whilst sexting other women for his pleasure. It means he’s hands free to text and he can get his pleasure whilst enjoying the steamy chat. Again, I find this really kinky and rather enjoy it.
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MRS and I have that dynamic, with the only boundry being obvious timing conflicts and not so much in front of others… so free us with some very specific boundries. We do naturally have a D/s type relationship but not so much in the most commonly displayed way. Again, the natural was that fits us.
But to the OP’s original discussion. It works great for us. Neither of us denies the others requests, urges, or advances unless there is a very specific reason - but we would not ask it under obviously bad conditions (i.e. someone is hurt or has a migraine and has been fighting it all day, not going to start an involved session with lots of physical demands). I would be happy to answer any specific questions about how it works in our lifestyle.