Help needed. Bdsm night planned.

Hi people. I want to surprise my wife with a naughty night of bdsm fun. She's into being tied up, blindfolds, gags and kinky outfits. She made it clear recently that she loves to be dominated. I know she will enjoy turning our room into a mini dungeon.

The HELP I need is in the planning. I want to surprise her on the night by leaving her notes around the home telling her what she should wear and where she needs to go and she should go with the flow, almost be her master. I just wanted to make it something different.

Any ideas on what notes to write.

Start with something like "tonight I will be ypur master" then if you've chosen her something to wear put it in a pile and leave a note on them saying "you will now put these on" no phrases or thank you's as its about you having total control.

Dpman wrote:

Hi people. I want to surprise my wife with a naughty night of bdsm fun. She's into being tied up, blindfolds, gags and kinky outfits. She made it clear recently that she loves to be dominated. I know she will enjoy turning our room into a mini dungeon.

The HELP I need is in the planning. I want to surprise her on the night by leaving her notes around the home telling her what she should wear and where she needs to go and she should go with the flow, almost be her master. I just wanted to make it something different.

Any ideas on what notes to write.

You are cordially invited to a night in the dark side.

If she's a Star wars fan she'll get this if not then the dark theme is black toys ect.

Don't forget to everything off with 'Your Master' and make her call you that, no normal or pet names allowed! And it's good to agree a 'safe' word so you could put that in the note, just in case something is too uncomfortable or painful. But keep it in the same style - you're commanding her! "Your safe word for this evening, should you need it, is ....."

Ooh I'm excited for you!! And for your sub!! 😜

Or combine it with a bit of role play?? Burglar / intruder disturbed by the lady of the house and wants her to tell you where her jewellery is hidden. Full body search to start......

I want to give her the choice of outfits and join me in another room.
I wanted to leave notes telling her what is going to happen and where to join me. Just something different a bit of bdsm role play.

Sounds thrilling.If you are truly her master then no choice with the outfit,you decide what you want to see her wear or not wear.!! Take control from the off.
Have fun.

Sounds thrilling.If you are truly her master then no choice with the outfit,you decide what you want to see her wear or not wear.!! Take control from the off.
Have fun.

I agree with Funlover69

I agree with the others and you must not give her a choice in anything ( that is the main point of being submissive, relinquishing control).

You could suggest she get in the shower/bath and make sure she shaves/waxed legs, armpits and her bits, if you like that 😊 Then if you do find a stray hair she will receive a punishment.
Request her to tie her hair, (easy for you to grab a ponytail 😊.
She must wear what you have placed on the bed (or wherever).
Leave instruction for her to join you in whichever room and she must kneel in the corner, palm face up on her thighs and head bowed awaiting instruction from you. She must not make a noise, laugh or whatever otherwise there will be punishment.
You could then tell her to not look at you and keep her eyes downcast. She will want to look at you so you could say you don't believe she can be good, so blindfold her.
This will help you with your confidence as she cannot see you faffing about. 😊

You could then tease her with your manhood around her mouth and ask her how much she wants it and if her answer isn't good enough, loud enough, in the right tone, too desperate or not desperate enough, say you aren't happy and either be rough with her or remove yourself from her. Put her over your knee for any insubordination, you must gradually warm up the area first though with rubs and light smacks. Get out the toys and tease and deny orgasm, or enforce orgasm. Whatever you do be safe, if using bondage equipment make sure it is not too tight and that she can be released quickly. Never leave her on her own whilst she's tied up as anything can happen. Safe words are excellent, we use the traffic light system and it works great. You must check in with her and look out for a change in breathing pattern if she becomes quiet and unresponsive this can mean she is slipping into subspace. I suggest reading up about this as it can be quite scary for a new Dominant and read up about aftercare which can mean a lot of talking after (sometimes the following day) lots of kisses and cuddles. I could say and suggest a lot more to you but I feel this post is long enough.
Oh and another thing to discuss is limits (hard and soft) there are bdsm checklists available online which you should ask her to complete as a task before your night of bdsm. This will be a good starting point for both of you to do and give you more ideas.
I hope this helps and have fun 😊

I'm not sure she'll be fully into the whole master side of things, she just likes to be tied up and used. We've tried it the other way around and she doesn't enjoy it as much she told me she like me to take control and she likes to feel used. We've done that side of things loads of times, blindfolds ropes handcuffs outfits. I just wanted to make more of an experience for her and maybe build some anticipation and take it to the next level.
As i said I'm not sure she will go for that full on master and pet role but I'm thing sensory depravation blindfold and gag then tease her tied up before really using her.
I wanted to leave her notes letters etc teasing her about a kinky fun filled night to come. I just have no idea how to get it started without sounding like the master side of it.
Thanks for the replies so far.

1 Like