You know normally I’m full of advice and guidance, but right here I have an issue of my own that I need your help with: how do I get my husband to play with my boobs for longer than a quick squeeze or suckle?
It’s driving me insane.
At 38 and childless by choice, my breasts are smaller, still perky and very sensitive. I love them for that: I love that I can go braless and not get a backache
One problem though: no matter what I do, I cannot seem to get my husband to play with my boobs for nearly as much as I want him to. I don’t think he hates them because he will play with them, just not nearly as often - or as impulsively - as I’d like.
For me, my boobs aren’t only a sex thing; they’re a bonding thing too. Before now when he’s been restless at night I’ve taken hubby’s hand and placed it on my boob, thinking my heartbeat and the softness of my faminine flesh might help him settle. Nope, he seems to think it’s inappropriate and pulls away. Even if I’m horny and try to instigate things by placing his hand on my breast so he feels my hard nipple when he wakes up, the same again.
I’ve tried being more vocal, that seems to work to a point but then he gets distracted by the other parts of sex and it’s over before it really started. My boobs need some love, damnit!
Boob play doesn’t do much for me but what about plastering your boobs in something like melted chocolate, chocolate mousse, trifle or squirty cream and get him to lick and suck it off or anything that you know he really likes. A bit like a mini sploshing session just for your boobs.
Mr K here. From a mans perspective I think there is only so much you can do with boobs so naturally you do go to other areas rather than stay on them but maybe you can introduce something so he spends more time there.
Maybe get a cup of ice and cup of hot peppermint tea and ask him to do some hot and cold teasing on your boobs/body.
You could also forbid him from going further south until your boobs have been fully satisfied to your liking.
Can i just check, Is you husband a man @Tenshadesandme I have not known a man who would not play with boobs for hours, they are magnificent in any form small, large , pert. I do feel for you, cannot give advice unfortunately. Good luck.
What a great idea from @Wood-Nymph get that vanilla ice cream out immediately . Who could say no to that. i would be first in the queue. @Tenshadesandme
My only thoughts are — and obviously I may love psychology, but reading minds is not a skill I currently possess — is that he thinks it’s “wrong” to touch? His father is an ex-biker, he’s very big on respecting women and always made sure my husband respected me, even if I said to my husband basically “hey, I’m kinky. You can be rough with me, I like it and I can take it”. Whether that’s had some knock-on effect? That’s all I’ve got.
My other thought is that his mother passed when he was young and I can’t help but think that may have had an impact too. Not in an inappropropriate way, but in that he’s only really had a male influence, and that man’s Mum (his Nan).
It sounds like he is very respectful and does not want to take advantage/assume , remember he is not a mind reader either so he may be thinking I better stop as she wont like it? The ice cream sounds a great idea, give it a try, if he likes ice cream that is. @Tenshadesandme
What about asking him for a boob massage? Tell him you want to lay back whilst he focuses on your boobs, but be prepared to give him lots of directions. They can definitely be done in a way that doesn’t detract from the mood and feel purely instructional. Frame it as you feeling the need to be pampered but you want to help him give you what you need. Without meaning to reduce sex to being transactional, you could always tell him that he’ll be rewarded for seeing to your needs too and find something you know he would like.
Tell him where you want him to start and how you’d like them playing with, tell him if you’d like him to be gentle and use his fingertips or be grabbing them using his entire hand. Tell him when / if you’d like him to move on to your nipples, or to focus on just one or on both. Use these check ins / instructions as the way to keep things going to satisfy your needs.
If this isn’t something he naturally does, I think he just needs guiding through it and possibly given instructions that are to satisfy your needs but give him permission to do things that perhaps fall outside of what he thinks is expected of him in terms of his views on being respectful.
I’m definitely teaching you to suck eggs and I’ve seen you give this advice so many times… but you’ll just have to communicate your way through this one.
Now I think on it, I do remember not long ago we had a discussion about masturbation and it was basically “I didn’t think you were in the mood” — we’d both assumed the other one was tired and neither of us wanted to bug the other about wanting to get it on
It’s entirely possible that that’s the culprit, it just doesn’t tally when I’ve told him several times “it’s really okay if you want to play with my boobs”
That’s an idea, I just think he’d look at me like I’d lost the plot. I love a back scratch/back massage, but a boob a massage? Where’d that one come from?
I do think communication is our issue, somehow, ironically. Far from not communicating with one another respectully, we’re perhaps communicating with one another too respectfully
Granted I’ve taken the “these are my boobs. You will look at them, you will play with them and you will like them” approach a handful (no pun intended) of times before. Generally it works, I just don’t always want to have to take the “my boobs, damnit!” approach
Don’t forget, I’m sexually submissive. It’s kind of a bit contradictory for a submissive to start ordering a Dominant about
I thought all guys were boob obsessed well in our case OH is obsessed with mine hands on them at all times , , have you outright just asked him To play with them more and why he isn’t ? Maybe there just are guys out there that can take them or leave them and find other areas more attractive which would be totally normal
I’m also a bad liar 
