Most of my Posts and those I comment on tend to be about spanking but I want to ask I suppose a sex related question.
I have never had sex after playing or smacked a bottom from behind while having sex. I do however admit that certain aspects of how I enjoy my partners are informed by each. As a sensualist and energy enthusiast sometimes things meld together as to my approach.
A shock of hair in my hand pulling someone back for whispers and kisses or a caress of a well spanked burning bottom come from different places but were previously honed by my partcipation in both.
So the question how are kink and sex melded into your activites?
@JGood Yeah, I know there are merits for both. I think my desire to compatmentalize the two came from one an extended period of celibacy (10 years) and early expectations from kink players of sex being the end result.
Sex is sex, sex is great. But add in a little kink? It becomes even better. For me personally, sex without kink is just… bleh. It can be good, but think of it like ordering from a menu - I’m not gonna order it every time
Everyone models their relationships differently, so the people in it decide how the “flow of events” works for them. My sessions normally end with sex but sometimes they don’t, or there’s sex and no kink. We don’t usually plan how things are going to go, it’s in the moment and I trust my husband/Master to lead me.
Unless I’m doing something like edge or primal play, I like spotenaity…in the moment…over… first we start here…then we go there…then I’ll use this. I tend to open my toy bag and smile…a lot!
In some ways I think this mirrors some of what happens when I play. The hair pulling as an example, the way I twist my hands in someones hair is different during sex than kink play. Softer and less pull vs intentional and totally wrapped. The act may seem the same but totally different and with different intentionality.
