Last nigh it finally did happen, me and my husband achieved full hands free prostate orgasm. We have been chasing it for almost a year now, and had many things to learn and discover, The expirience was so powerful and amazing that we did decide to share keypoints for other couples to hold on on this long yourney. Me and Tim are both in our mid 30s, fit, not into bdsm or any tipe of domination, humiliation or any type of those things, but we doo like to experiment and chase kinky pleasure. As for prostate I doo use only my fingers(1 to 2), no toys, because I can feel it better. We use only doggy because of easy access and great sight that i get. I wont talk about basic stuff here like lube, gloves relaxing and so on...
First things first, not everyone is made the same way, so we cant promise the things we did discover will work for other couples aswell. By saying that I also should mention that we doo love each other very much and can talk about every single detail about sex with open minds, for us this expirience first of all was an emotional one(we cant imagine how someone could have prostate orgasm without 100 procent trust and strong emotional bond both ways)..
1)As from above, the first and most important keypoint is emotional bond and state of mind, we did struggle with this alot, because Tim needed to overcome his masculinity and bee the reciever, and the constant stress"Is this gonna bee okay? what to do now?" later turned out for us to bee devastating progresswise. We both needed to learn not to stress and just let everything happen and enjoy every second. Tim knows that i love his prostate and everything with it, and him knowing that makes everything alot easier. Also, you both must bee comfortable knowing that in every human beeing there is masculine and feminine side, and thats its completeley normal for hetero male sometimes to embrace and enjoy the feminine side aswell.
2)Conditioning. As i mentioned above we are not in any kind of bdsm relationship, but for last month we both agreed "nono to any kind of penile stimulation, this did help alot, because pleasure zone slowly transfered to prostate, could even feel the changes with my fingers. Hardest part for Tim was to deal with constant hornyness, he did get sexual attention whenever he wanted, but it was "assonly". After first week his testies started to hurt, because he has been used to cum atleast 3 time s a week abd was horny all the time, we did discover that soft testie massage helped on this. The looks of testies have changed aswell, you could tell that they did hang more lower and seemed more looser, bigger, softer and fuller on touch. Things work out much better with high arrousal, and full testies equals high arrousal.
3)What to focuss on? You both should forget about prostate orgasm and focuss ONLY on relaxing, sensations and pleasure, it took some time for our sessions that ended without ejaculation to feel normal. As a giver you should focuss on observing partners body reactions and reacting to them. As for Tim, when his cock loses erection and shrinks abit staying semi hard, thats when i doo know that hes prostate is ready for more intense stimulation (faster, not stronger, becaue if you push too hard pleasure goes away and you are 1 step back), if Tims knees start to clench, i know that his pleasure is high but he is for some reason holding it back. verbal encouragment and positive feedback here is the key. Say anything that gets the boat going - like "Give it to me. You are doing great. I can feel your prostate filling up, but you need to relax more", or any kinky stuff that turns your man on. If you are very open minded and kinky, you can even put on some porn in background and give it some wiggle from time to time.
4)Time. Same as for woman, pleasure buildups take time. If you rush things, you will hit the wall pleasurewise, like Tim says, its one point that feels good and you cant get better. By time our sessions did last longer and in the end the pleasure Tim did get was much more intense. Sessions should last atleast 30 minutes, the longest session we had was 3 hours, with some brakes.
5)Breath, never let your partner to hold breath, encaurage to breath deeep and long breaths, righ breath equals pleasure waves all over body, wich is required for anything to move further. Its ok to moan :)
6) Opening up. Not only relaxing but inviting anal pleasure in mind aswell. Focus on emotional bond that you oth have, let it overcome you both and overtake your pleasure. During orgasm Tim was focussing only on giving his trust to me, brearhing and "not shaking too hard".;)
As for giver it has been one if not the most intense and pleasurable expirience i have ever had in my sex life. The emotions wher overwhelming for both of us and the sight was amazing. The orgasm it self did last about 35 seconds, cock was semi hard, but quite small and i could feel the prostate pulses with my fingers, but semen did not spurt out, for first 15 seconds it was long slow stream of cum that ended with 8 more squirts and few emptyones after that aswell. Tim told that hes body just radiated with pleasure waves and at the point of no return the waves just all blended and it was nonstop bliss.
So keep your hopes up, enjoy the process and good luck to you all. As for us, we are staying open minded and on my bd as a gift(my innitiative) Tim will present the sight where he is taken anally by another male for first time. So we are practicing for it so that Tim gets maximum pleasure out of it as a receaver aswell. Cant wait :)