Impact Play or Spanking

I am just curious as to what sensations you enjoy out of spanking or Impact Play.

Let me explain.

When my OH applies a stroke with a paddle it leaves a pleasant not quite burning but a more stinging sensation afterwards.but does nothing to increase my sex drive. I do like it much harder that she does .

When I spank my OH ( lightly) and rub inside of her thighs it tends to turn her on, ready for love making( I am trying not to be too graphic here) .Hence her preference is erotic spanking as part of foreplay .

You can see from a similar activity we get 2 completely different sensations . Therefore is the sensations a woman gets totally different to that of a guy ?

Whilst I do have a couple of books on the subject it doesn't seem to mention about differing sensations between men and women but I also understand that womans skin is totally different to that of a guy. Not to mention the effect hormones also have.



For me, spanking hurts at first, but soon turns into a lovely warm tingle that heightens my senses, and that's why it feels great.

What I love most about spanking/impact play is the control my partner exercises over me. It's more of a mentally stimulating thing for me, because I love the idea that he is dominanting me and asserting his power by spanking me.

As I'm not a very dominant person, I don't really enjoy doing the spanking, as it doesn't give me mental or physical satisfaction and brings me outside of my comfort zone. Sometimes I spank my partner during sex, and he finds that a turn on because it's a sign that I'm horny and carried away, but there's never a time when I have him bent over especially for spanking, as it's not something he enjoys on its own.

I don't think there is a difference between a man and a woman, but there is between one individual and another.

Part of the kink is getting turned on by doing something "taboo". Part of the feelings are the way that the body reacts to pain. If you have a high pain threshold (which it sounds like you do) then you are probably not quite reaching that limit to where your body starts to release the really good endorphins into your blood.

Actually, you may find that you get turned on over longer periods of sensory play (get your SO to tie you up and blindfold you. Then get her to try a lot of different sensations with different toys or even house hold items starting slow and working up. Nails, fur, wooden spoon, ice, bristles on a hair brush etc. Just make sure shes aware of your sensitive areas (ie kidneys, joints, glands etc) - there's loads online about safe areas or avoid ("red") areas for impact play - but it sounds like you already have a lot of books. The longer play may really get the endorphins pumping, whereas short sharp slaps may not. Also building up the sensory play before full impact can "wake up" the skin making it a lot more receptive to impact at a lower level (meaning you don't have to be hit so hard) - this means that you will get a different sensation to try out. The goal is to lose yourself, and just have the sensations. You will probably not be up for sex immediately after and will just want to curl up under a blanket and bliss out.

At the end of the day, if you don't get off on impact play then don't stress out about it. Not everyone does. If your partner does get off on administering then lay back and just chill and enjoy and treat it like a slightly kinky massage!

I like the actual pain. The warm afterglow nice too, but the pain is what really gets me off.

So a light spanking isn't my bag really, I like a hard forceful spanking, followed by decent impact devices.

I can orgasm from this alone, no sexual contact at all. And this will get me wetter than any other sexual activity.

It's even more arousing when the person hitting me is really into it and I can here the changes in their breathing or if they moan a little or something, awesome.

I don't especially enjoy being dominant either, but I do enjoy hitting people with stuff. Not because I enjoy the control, but I enjoy causing the pain I know they will be feeling.


I like to be spanked fairly hard with either hubby's hand or a nice leather paddle. The pain is a definite turn on but I agree with Lady S - the change in his breathing as he gets more turned on makes it even better - especially when he gets to the point of rubbing himself against me and groaning each time he hits me. Love him to play with my pussy whilst doing it and can guaratee I'll come extremely hard and quickly. Also love the soothing, gentle rub afterwards.

Hubby does like to be spanked but it is rather during sex, not usually planned and it certainly gets him going. He prefers my hand rather then an implement of some kind.

My OH loves the feeling of me taking her from behind after she has been spanked. She said the tenderness really adds to the sensation and makes her come very quickly.

Subdom27 wrote:

My OH loves the feeling of me taking her from behind after she has been spanked. She said the tenderness really adds to the sensation and makes her come very quickly.

+1 yep would agree with her on this definitely :)

Sometimes it's the person not the act which reflects the pleasure. The act is foreplay into a more sensation act.the lady at work, I love the way she smacks me.only if we could go the full way. Dream on.

The stinging is what does it for me . It heightens my senses but gives a little rush especially during sex!

Thanks guys for you experiences and input ![](upload://ez5kOkpKXRZOxjavAURYmQxVTau.gif)

I think it confirms that me and my Mrs get different things out of impact play. With me its the stinging sensation and yes I agre perhaps I do need a longer session to get the full benefit.

With my Mrs it is clearly a turn on and doesn't need it hard for this to happen and I agree it does make it easier to take her from behind afterewards .

So my experiences are a little different maybe!! We use spanking as a punishment, usually weekly to keep my attitude in check and remind me who's in charge (oh) and to list my misdemeanours for the week or since my last punishment.

When he texts me in the morning to say that it's punishment night I'm immediately twitchy, wet and horny. Even the thought is a massive turn on, sometimes he texts through the day to list the things I'm being pumished for ( answering back, no garlic bread with the lasagne) and this has the same effect.

during the spanking the first few strokes are quite stingy and painful but it settles into an increasingly warm glow until I feel almost totally overwhelmed ( he uses mainly his hand and a wooden spatula/spoon/paddle) my orgasm is amazing during this 😜 I like to work up to it really hard and he delivers !!

I also love over the next few days that it is bruised and is painful, it makes me remember my punishment, why I was punished and how bloody great it was at the time and how much I want it again next time.

i actually crave it, I need it and I want it to be harder, longer and more painful and I want the marks to last longer ( think we are moving up to a cane soon and are discussing his belt coming into use!!)

so that's idea if this was any help lol☺️


From my experience there isn't a difference between gender, but more of a difference between individuals. Although saying that, you can predict a little about how someone may react to a spanking depending on where you spank and what you use to spank them with. SOme items offer more of a sting, some a thud, and some mix it up a bit. Some areas have certain nerve endings in which cause similar reactions in most people (like spanking the inner thigh can be a turn-on for many).

Daily moods and health also affect how a spanking is felt. If a submissive is under the weather, they aren't going to react to a spanking the same way they normally would - hence why it's always best to ask a sub about how they feel that day.

There are some who like to draw out a spanking, and others will get whjat they need from a couple. There are a few subs who say that they hate spanking and only see it as a punishment, and others who love it. Some see it as a challenge and aim to beat their past record.

I say sub, but a person being spanked doesn't have to be a sub, they can be a masochist only, but I mainly deal with a sub.

I disappoint people when I'm spanked... I just ignore it and shrug it off. Personally, if I don't want to feel it, I switch off in ways and won't find it pleasureable or painful. I just see it as a bore and roll my eyes at the spankee. This often takes all the fun out of the spankee.

But when I'm dealing the spanks, whips, floggings and cannings, I come alive. My eyes widen, and I get a buzz out of it. I find it highly pleasureable to do. Although I must admit my favourite is highly sadistic spankings, but there are few who can handle this. But like many subs who go into sub space, I go into my little space after a good session.

For me it's the psychological connection which is important too, and gets me off. From the sub who loves to be rewarded with a hundred or more paddlings, to the reason why a bad sub is being spanked. I think the psychological plays a key roll with the subs too, with the reason behind the spanking. To perform a spanking for no reason often leaves them confused or disappointed, and personally sometimes doing it just because you can, can be abused by some Doms.