How do people in long term relationships initiate sex?
It can be anything from dressing up sexy and surprising each other, a full on romantic evening with a nice home cooked meal to simply "I have put the toys on charge if you fancy a little fun" it's not always romantic.
I usually just get told "Right. You. Get upstairs now" or "Stand up. Take your clothes off". And I'm not one to argue.
All starts with a cup of tea in the morning
We look after our grandchildren on 4 days of the week and evenings don't work either so we have limited windows of opportunity. To be precise Thursday, Saturday and Sunday mornings.
As a result of this strict timetable nobody needs to initiate anything as we both know when it's going to happen.
What we don't know of course is exactly what's going to happen as we have a large collection of toys, a lot of imagination and unlimited time on those days.
My Husband sometimes asks for "a floor show" while I'm getting dressed and he is still in the bed. The general involves shedding the cosy dressing gown and putting on underwear..and him making comments then pouncing at some point. This is great instigation!
My OH will sometimes throw a leg over mine when we have just gotten to bed as a way of saying she is open and ready. Sometimes when she can't sleep at 2 in the morning she will rub me until I wake up so she can have sex in the hope it helps her go back to sleep. (I have told her that I don't mind to be woken up for sex during my sleep) (She has told me never to wake her up during the night for sex) I tend to ask her for sex if it has been awhile since our last session. Other times I might rest my hand on her leg and then move it to her groin, if she wants sex she will leave my hand there, if not she will move it back to her leg. We usually have sex twice a week. Every weekend and anyone of the weekdays.
No set way, spontaneous sex is always the best, a little increased risk heightens the experience.
I don't live with my lovers so like others time is limited as to when/where esp with our children being older now! For our threesome it takes planning as we want the children out of the house before anything more than flirting or a hand hold starts. Thanks to parties & other events we have a window of opportunity later this week, no idea what will.happen but I do know I will be wearing my new LH undies I brought! Again for me & my lady it is down to windows of opportunity- so planning time together. However me and him it is far more spontaneous- we both have a relatively high sex drive and more time alone together. Usually it starts with a cuddle or a hold of our hands and that look in our eyes.