Jelqing

I'm not going to use the quote function because it keeps eatting my post. =)

I was refering in that I do not find sexually stimulating what the majority of men may not consider sexually stimulating, and therefore I do not fit in the generalization.

I'm i'm honest I was perhaps being a bit spiteful over this comment, "It's kind of disgusting but that's men for you!" so I apologise. =) Relating that it was disgusting, but that men like it, therefore men are disgusting, was what I got from that, but that might just be me being sensitive.

I really do not feel any sort of anger or resentment or any bad feeling toward you by the way. In fact this thread has been one of the most interesting ones i've been on in ages. Not agreeing doesn't mean we are arguing. =)

Pixieking wrote:

You're perfectly welcome to be here, and nobody here really fits entirely. We all have our own opinions.

Generalizations are reasonable in certain contexts. I made a generalization when I said that most women don't like having thier cervix hit. I also know of at least one woman who enjoys having her cervix stimulated.

Neither option is wrong. Some like it stimulated, most do not. Both of those are fine for those paricular groups.

Thank you

Alicia D'amore wrote:

Of course I don't discuss sexual preferences with every man I meet but of all those I have - nope they all like smaller breasts. Two out of three of my closest male friends have very small breasted partners - that doesn't automatically mean they prefer it but I've found in their cases they do :).

If you do a search on the forums - there's a whole thread on the benefits of smaller boobies :P

Adx

But I bet there aren't many threads about big boobs? (Assuming I'm right) Why? Cos it's boring! Every man likes big boobs! - Sweeping generalisation yes but I don't care!

Alicia D'amore wrote:

Of course I don't discuss sexual preferences with every man I meet but of all those I have - nope they all like smaller breasts. Two out of three of my closest male friends have very small breasted partners - that doesn't automatically mean they prefer it but I've found in their cases they do :).

If you do a search on the forums - there's a whole thread on the benefits of smaller boobies :P

Adx

But I bet there aren't many threads about big boobs? (Assuming I'm right) Why? Cos it's boring! Every man likes big boobs! - Sweeping generalisation yes but I don't care!

Alicia D'amore wrote:

Of course I don't discuss sexual preferences with every man I meet but of all those I have - nope they all like smaller breasts. Two out of three of my closest male friends have very small breasted partners - that doesn't automatically mean they prefer it but I've found in their cases they do :).

If you do a search on the forums - there's a whole thread on the benefits of smaller boobies :P

Adx

But I bet there aren't many threads about big boobs? (Assuming I'm right) Why? Cos it's boring! Every man likes big boobs! - Sweeping generalisation yes but I don't care!

Pixieking wrote:

I'm not going to use the quote function because it keeps eatting my post. =)

I was refering in that I do not find sexually stimulating what the majority of men may not consider sexually stimulating, and therefore I do not fit in the generalization.

I'm i'm honest I was perhaps being a bit spiteful over this comment, "It's kind of disgusting but that's men for you!" so I apologise. =) Relating that it was disgusting, but that men like it, therefore men are disgusting, was what I got from that, but that might just be me being sensitive.

I really do not feel any sort of anger or resentment or any bad feeling toward you by the way. In fact this thread has been one of the most interesting ones i've been on in ages. Not agreeing doesn't mean we are arguing. =)

I'll argue with you on that one. We are arguing! But there's nothing wrong with that!

As I said - it's a different situation here. In "normal" life - I tend to agree. I'm not anti PC, it has it's uses but I do think there's a fine line between being deliberately offensive and someone being offended by something you said.

However - this is a place where we discuss very personal, sensitive topics and topics that are often judged in the wider world. Here is a place where we strive to be non-judgemental and we take extra care to word things carefully. Because to say something potentially offensive here could give someone as serious, long term confidence knock and I for one think it's best to avoid it,

As I said - we alter our language for different situations - for example whilst I don't avoid swearing if I'm in the vicinity of children, if I went to a childrens play area I would avoid swearing because the situation is different.

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John1986 wrote:

Alicia D'amore wrote:

Of course I don't discuss sexual preferences with every man I meet but of all those I have - nope they all like smaller breasts. Two out of three of my closest male friends have very small breasted partners - that doesn't automatically mean they prefer it but I've found in their cases they do :).

If you do a search on the forums - there's a whole thread on the benefits of smaller boobies :P

Adx

But I bet there aren't many threads about big boobs? (Assuming I'm right) Why? Cos it's boring! Every man likes big boobs! - Sweeping generalisation yes but I don't care!

But you could say the same about weight! Loads of threads about being overweight, very few about being underweight but I'm sure you could argue men tend to prefer overweight women to underweight.

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Pixieking wrote:

John, I really wouldn't want you to be put off this forum because it's a really great forum.

There are loads of thread on this forum along the lines off "I really love men in ladies undies, anyone else here really enjoy their OH in ladies pants, and if so, what kind do you most enjoy?" That is a normal, every day post for LH. The same could be said if you posted a thread saying "I want to have a bigger penis, how many ladies out there like their man to have a big cock?" and that would be cool too.

What those posts don't do is try and claim that anything is sexually better than something else outside of personal opinion. It's about sharing what you find enjoyable, or what you don't find enjoyable, but not expecting others to share your attraction.

I totally agree with you.

I think the problem I've been having is that the generalisations I've made from the "real" world are not always applicable in the Lovehoney world. And I guess that this is maybe due to the "fact" that Lovehoney customer base are not representative of the UK as a whole i.e. there is a bias - there is a certain type of person who uses a website like this. And then a smaller subset who use these forums. This was not meant to sound like a negative but I couldn't find another way of wording it.

I think the best introduction to this forum is to think of it as a place that thrives of sex-positivity. Sex positivity isn't about enjoying, likeing or sharing sexual kinks or habits, and it's not even about enjoying sex, it's just that everyone is entitled to their own sexual identity and enjoyment and that nobodies identity is "wrong" (Inside of safe, sane and concentual for most) even if it is not right for you. =)

We try not to trash what other people like or dislike here, we just try and give our own opinions about we like or don't like, or to share and give advice and information to others. =)

I'm also pretty sure there will be a few threads on the joys of big breated women. I've seen breast porn where the women were litterally titanic in the boob department. Massive breast fetish isn't uncommon. =)

Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

Slow posting and everything is moving so quickly! Lol!

Um.. I'm not sure if I can make myself very clear at all, but I see your post alicia about it not being genetic or instict, but environmental. But if he has this fascination with large breasts, it could be what is going on in his brain that tells him to go for large breasts. Its not the case for most men, but it could be a factor, maybe this is something to do with his environment that makes him see it this way. Of cpurse itx not the only explanaition, objectifying women happens a lot. There is actually a name for the type of person who sees women more zas objects and doesn't think much of their pleasure (not a swear word honest, its a cndition, but can't remember the name) I don't want to make it sound like you are suffering a condition, but it is out there and sounds a little like yourself, except that you have the thought of your penis not being adequate for a woman.. but it could still be the same condition because you still have your brain telling you that women like bicg cocks zand this is what they must like. Same as your brain tells you that women should have large boobs and like sex hard.

I think I definitely have this condition. I do think of women as sex objects (I honestly wish I didn't) but on the other hand, I do love giving them sexual pleasure. It's just as good as receiving in my eyes.

I wouldn't agree with that. Your possition was that, given the choise, the majority of men would want their partners to have bigger breasts. I don't believe that is true, and most of the varied things I have heard along those lines tends to come from what women believe rather than what men believe, quite similarly to how men are more likely to believe cock size is the most important criteria.

John1986 wrote:

I totally agree with you.

I think the problem I've been having is that the generalisations I've made from the "real" world are not always applicable in the Lovehoney world. And I guess that this is maybe due to the "fact" that Lovehoney customer base are not representative of the UK as a whole i.e. there is a bias - there is a certain type of person who uses a website like this. And then a smaller subset who use these forums. This was not meant to sound like a negative but I couldn't find another way of wording it.

It doesn't sound negative. I still don't agree it applies to the wider world either :P. But we *aren't* representative of the wider world here - we all tend to be lovely, liberal, open minded people who tend to be pro personal choice and pro sexual openness. I think it's actually very positive :)

I will also say - I mix in very similar circles IRL - I hang out with Skeptics who tend to be lovely, liberal, open minded, pro personal choice and pro sexual openness and scientists who are much of the same. But I would simply say when it comes to attraction - there is a kink for everything out there. Everything you can think of - someone out there will find it attractive! We all have such variations in our preferences that when it comes to human attraction I find generalisations tend to be unhelpful.

Adx

Oh and PK's point about sex positivity hits the nail on the head.

John1986 wrote:

I think it's best if I stay off these forums. I'm clearly very very different to most people on here and don't really fall in line with the whole LH ethos.

Ah, but see that's just it: there is no "most people" here! ^_^ Honestly, that's the beauty of it, you can find someone to represent pretty much any point of view here, and for the most part people will be tolerant, even if they don't agree. All that's asked is that you grant the same courtesy.

I know all you're trying to do is make everyone see where you're coming from with your generalisation, but all everyone else is asking you to accept is that it's your opinion and can't be held as 'fact'. Neither would anyone here claim as fact that all men love small boobs, or even that most men don't give a crap what size they are once they're getting to give 'em a honk! Bit of give and take, and that's all there is to it.

Thing with generalisations is that they are handy for processing, but only when it's necessary. For a context-neutral thing, we say "i before e, except after c". But then we find words like "weird" that go against that. Doesn't mean we stop teaching that rule, we just also teach that there's exceptions to it. In cases like that, 'generalising' is handy, because it means that 99% of the time, you follow it and you get it right, which is better than guessing blindly will get you. However, when you get to much more fluid data, such as personal preferences in breast sizes, it's impossible to generalise, because you cannot get a large enough sample size to derive that claim from, and even if you could, you couldn't rely on the results to be perfectly factual - hell, even lie detectors aren't good enough, as some reports claim as low as ~70% accuracy (it does amuse me that there's not even a single true answer as to how accurate they are, but that's a personal love of irony). And, after all that, you have to account for shifting fashion trends, which could change before you even compile all that hard-earned data! Basically, it's not something that's possible to generalise about without fallacious reasoning. However, you're defeinitely allowed to say that you've found that most men prefer big boobs, or even that you can see the logic behind the notion that men are programmed to like them bigger. Basically, stating it as an opinion, rather than dressing it up as a generalisation.

Bear in mind, too, that you could be insulting people without meaning it. No, it doesn't mean you have to be all crazy-PC and not squeak lest someone be offended, lawdy lawdy. Just remember that body image is a very sensitive subject - as you yourself are aware, being so conscious of your penis size that you're willing to do special exercises to get the tiniest of results! - so saying somethign like "bigger is better, so say all of mankind" does indirectly say "those smaller members of the audience? fuck off, no one wants you except the odd freak." Not your intention, I know, but when it's such a sensitive subject, it's better to try and be a bit mre considerate.

Well Im not one for arguing about size but I prefer smaller cocks myself. Oh and have to say much prefer smaller breasts.

Since John here seems to be inclined to dismiss all of the men who've loved my A cups, I'll let one of my favourite pieces of art do the talking. The woman is gorgeous, sensuous and small breasted. She might not be your cup of tea, but plenty of others appreciate that lovely shape.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Lilith_(John_Collier_painting).jpg

rose hip wrote:

Since John here seems to be inclined to dismiss all of the men who've loved my A cups, I'll let one of my favourite pieces of art do the talking. The woman is gorgeous, sensuous and small breasted. She might not be your cup of tea, but plenty of others appreciate that lovely shape.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Lilith_(John_Collier_painting).jpg

Im not an arty person but she is quite something.

rose hip wrote:

Since John here seems to be inclined to dismiss all of the men who've loved my A cups, I'll let one of my favourite pieces of art do the talking. The woman is gorgeous, sensuous and small breasted. She might not be your cup of tea, but plenty of others appreciate that lovely shape.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Lilith_(John_Collier_painting).jpg

Nice rack. ;)

(Edit: Urgh, emoticon no workie!)

WandA wrote:

rose hip wrote:

Since John here seems to be inclined to dismiss all of the men who've loved my A cups, I'll let one of my favourite pieces of art do the talking. The woman is gorgeous, sensuous and small breasted. She might not be your cup of tea, but plenty of others appreciate that lovely shape.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Lilith_(John_Collier_painting).jpg

Nice rack. ;)

(Edit: Urgh, emoticon no workie!)

You have to edit the post and readd the smilies at the mo. They'res a problem but fine if you edit and try again!

Adx

Alicia D'amore wrote:

WandA wrote:

rose hip wrote:

Since John here seems to be inclined to dismiss all of the men who've loved my A cups, I'll let one of my favourite pieces of art do the talking. The woman is gorgeous, sensuous and small breasted. She might not be your cup of tea, but plenty of others appreciate that lovely shape.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Lilith_(John_Collier_painting).jpg

Nice rack. ;)

(Edit: Urgh, emoticon no workie!)

You have to edit the post and readd the smilies at the mo. They'res a problem but fine if you edit and try again!

Adx

Well that's a completely messed up word - that should say "there's"

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